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We don’t have freedom of speech for the mass market. Not sure we ever did – but then I’m not sure anywhere has. Organised religions are madness. But I would be fascinated to see how they psych a chap up for suicide bombing. We could get teenagers to run en-masse into death. Alone seems somehow harder to achieve. Different motivational skills. Also: I’m sure I read about a female suicide bomber. What do they get in death? And how much of a motivational factor are the 70 virgins? I made whoopee with a virgin once and it wasn’t anywhere near as much fun as making whoopee with a non-virgin. That’s just 70 sore willies. 70 deeply embarrassed silences. 70 ‘I’ll get betters’. And for the female bomber, almost 35 minutes of sex and a whole lot of thiquid. So if it’s not the virgins, what’s getting them going? The fact that other people are getting it? (Just noticed the hunk in the Aero bubbles advert has a lazy left eye). Cultural misrepresentation? The problem is, of course, that Hollywood hasn’t found a mismatch comedy vehicle for Arabs yet. We’ve had Bringing Up Baby (women!), The Persuaders (English!), 48 Hours (blacks!), Shanghai Noon (Chinese!). Where’s Owen Wilson when you need him?
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