The hunt is on for the bombers, let's have your theories.
PooF! Soon come. I, unfortunately, am at work today.
Posted by Toilet Duck (Member # 801) on :
My Dad and I both had the same instant reaction to the first announcements - "wow, the French were really pissed about the Olympics."
No I'm not so sure...
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
Bush did it - worried that all the little starving african children were taking away the light from his attak on terrror, him Blair and Chirac got together and decided London. Blaire wanted minimum casualties though, Bush wanted something big, Chirac mediated - well, you got the olympics mon brave....
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
Radio 4 called Chirac an Olympic Loser this morning which made me do a 7am-lol.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
NWoD claimed yesterday to be in posession of some sort of mind-blowingly terrifying secret knowledge - did he let you in on it, Uber?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
[Northern paranoia] It was anti-Metrolink campaigners trying to make sure the whole of transport budget gets spent in London. Rather than Manchester.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
It was so obviously Blair, it's embarrassing. Just as the US Government took out the Twin Towers to facilitate its wars on Iraq and Afghanistan, so Blair needed a rock solid reason to start major renovation on our aging tube network. Obviously any big works is going to engender a huge amount of resentment towards the Government, unless the Government can come up with a situation in which people feel like they're winning by NOT whingeing. It's a winning situation. He gets to overhaul the underground and not only do people not complain - they take pride in not complaining.
It's basically the same sort of thing as when the folk in charge burnt down London in 1666 because they had plans for a better one.
Posted by squeegy (Member # 136) on :
Possibly a group of French-Arabic anarchists plotting against the English because of the Olympic bid, the Iraq war, globalization and bad British food.
Posted by Vanilla Online Persona (Member # 301) on :
It was all one big marketing extravaganza to publicise this weekend's must see event .. An Audience With Louche, five times winner of the UK's flattest flatcap competition (Northern Division).
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
My transmogrification into complete charicature of self is now complete. Oh well, only another 33 posts of this shit to go.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: It was so obviously Blair, it's embarrassing.
Hard-hitting expose co-authored by Thorn and Snorton.
Posted by H1ppychick (Member # 529) on :
It's alarming that one in three people are apparently buying that bullshit in bucket-loads.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Fucking hell, if I did write something like that it'd be a damn sight more convincing.
quote: The mainstream media should ask the following questions:
1. Why did a senior police officer tell the BBC less than twenty four hours before the London attacks that the London police felt that they were on top of the terrorist threat?
Because they felt they were - the question would have been asked because the G8 summit was happening. The police might well have felt confident, and a senior police officer is unlikely to tell a beeb reporter "Actually - it's a fucking shambles here."
2. Were the alleged bombers under surveillance before the attacks, and if not how were they apprehended?
They... haven't been apprehended?
3. To what extent were the bombers motivated by rage at the failure of the UK media to report truthfully on the war on Iraq where torture and death squad killings by the U.S./UK puppet regime have reached a similar scale to the Saddam Hussein regime.
What?
4. Does the Blair government now admit that the illegal invasion of Iraq has aided terrorism?
No - they don't admit this. The home secretary already said as much. Pay attention.
5. Blair boasted to the Jewish Chronicle that he has given more support to Israel than any other UK premier. Will Blair now reconsider his support for Ariel Sharon and his decision to breach his own arms guidelines to supply the occupation forces there with the means to kill Palestinian children?
6. Why did initial reports say the Underground was disrupted by a power surge?
Because there was a desire not to say 'Terrorist!' until it was absolutely certain it was a terrorist attack, in the interest of not provoking panic.
God. This conspiracy theorist is rubbish! These things should be watertight if they're going to inspire the right level of "th-they're controlling us?" twitchy panic.
I don't think this is going to make the ID card thing any easier for Labour. For one thing there's now a solid question "How would ID cards have prevented the London bombings?" that's going to prove tricky to answer convincingly.
[ 08.07.2005, 06:09: Message edited by: Thorn Davis ]
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
On a news site over here they're saying the attacks were allegedly carried out by British youths.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Is that the Daily Mail news site?
edit: actually I wouldn't be suprised if the perpetrators were British. I keep thinking of the trio of Brummy Muslim terrorists from Monkey Dust.
[ 08.07.2005, 06:04: Message edited by: Thorn Davis ]
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Is that the Daily Mail news site?
I bet they were wearing hoodies!
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: NWoD claimed yesterday to be in posession of some sort of mind-blowingly terrifying secret knowledge
Not mind blowing, but I had heard the correct figures, which I couldn't say at the time. Sorry. Do I win points for drama?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: Do I win points for drama?
Not if your secret number was 37 and the number all over the news was 33. No.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
We are 5 (Now 4) posts away from a magic Life post moment.
Posted by Vanilla Online Persona (Member # 301) on :
Bugger. I was expecting him to reveal the location of the Grail. I'm rather disappointed.
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
Pointless gossip and supposition, no324. A woman in this office has just come from St Mary's hospital, where she says the surgeon was saying twice as many injured were admitted as the police said, and reckons the death toll could go to 200.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
I'm beginning to question the veracity of my source here at work, but the brother of the FB dick now reckons one of the tube bombs was on the underside of one of the trains.
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: 37
That was my secret number, but dang had said 2 confirmed. I didn't claim it was exciting. But it's nice to see people try and snap your hand off in the hopes of some juicy insider gozzip.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: Pointless gossip and supposition, no324. A woman in this office has just come from St Mary's hospital, where she says the surgeon was saying twice as many injured were admitted as the police said, and reckons the death toll could go to 200.
Hmmm. You reckon that could be the same surgeon who saw "at least ten bodies" at the site of the bus blast that killed two.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: dang had said 2
dang? dang? Yesterday meant nothing to dang! He was laughing at us from his rocky hyperborean promontory while we burned in fear, terror and panic. Nobody was even listening to dang!
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Has anybody got the full ludicrous name of the mob who claimed the bombing yesterday?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
It was something really catchy like THE SECRET ORGANISATION OF AL QUAIDA SECRET JIHAD ORGANISATION IN EUROPE.
[ 08.07.2005, 06:25: Message edited by: Vogon Poetess ]
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: It was something really catchly like THE SECRET ORGANISATION OF AL QUAIDA SECRET JIHAD ORGANISATION IN EUROPE.
Something like that...
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: I'm beginning to question the veracity of my source here at work, but the brother of the FB dick now reckons one of the tube bombs was on the underside of one of the trains.
That sounds like bollocks to me. The Scum has a picture here that looks as though the blast came from the inside of the carriage. My reckoning would be that this was a comparatively simple, lo-tech attack using bombs small enough to leave under the usual debris of Burger King wrappers and copies of fucking Metro on finds in abundance on the rush hour tube.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: It was something really catchly like THE SECRET ORGANISATION OF AL QUAIDA SECRET JIHAD ORGANISATION IN EUROPE. Secret Organisation Group of al-Qaeda of Jihad Organisation in Europe
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: That was my secret number, but dang had said 2 confirmed.
Which was correct at the time I posted it, just as 37 is correct at the time of posting this. Obviously I didn't think it was going to stay at 2 any more than I think it's going to stay at 37 now.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: Secret Organisation Group of al-Qaeda of Jihad Organisation in Europe
I knew Europe would be involved in it somehow. Kilroy-Silk was right all along.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: any more than I think it's going to stay at 37 now.
God, give it a rest. You monster! Can't you see we're grieving?
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Which was correct at the time I posted it, just as 37 is correct at the time of posting this. Obviously I didn't think it was going to stay at 2 any more than I think it's going to stay at 37 now.
It doesn't really matter what the result it, it's not much to write home about really is it?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Secret Organisation Secret Group of Secret al-Qaeda of Secret Jihad Secret Organisation in Secret Europe on Double Secret Probation.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay:
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Which was correct at the time I posted it, just as 37 is correct at the time of posting this. Obviously I didn't think it was going to stay at 2 any more than I think it's going to stay at 37 now.
It doesn't really matter what the result it, it's not much to write home about really is it?
Hmm. Which TMO poster organised the attacks to facilitate a long-overdue Dang65 backlash?
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
I was only kidding Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: I was only kidding
Oh, NWoD. It was you was it? It's all fun and games until 37 people are dead and the country's largest city is crippled by fear.
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: crippled by fear.
Fucksticks, I was going for burning. Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
Well, we of the Secret Group Of Secretly Encouraging People To Get On A Fucking Bike For A Change are a bit disappointed with the results I must say.
Newsreader: "Everyone's struggling to get home this evening..."
Me: "...apart from those with bicycles..."
N: "...thousands of people are walking slowly along the road...
M: "...apart from the ones riding bicycles..."
N: "...most of them will get home very late tonight..."
M: "...apart from the ones with bikes who will get home at exactly the same time as they do every fucking night..."
N: "...etc etc."
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
Do you think dang likes bikes?
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
You can murder as many innocent people as you like, Dang. The British people won't be terrorised into cycling .
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Goddammit. Some friends of mine have just moved house - they used to be within walking distance. Now they're about five miles away, as the crow flies, but the craziness of our transport system means that it's an 1 hour round trip on the train (going into London and back out again). Even more irritating is the fact that there's a disused railway line that directly connects our flats, now it's used as nothing more than somewhere for people to walk their dogs. Is there no way I can ever see my friends again. I used to enjoy seeing them every evening.
On the good news side, I've got £500 burning a hole in my pocket. What to spend it on? Might put it into a Gym fund, as I'm getting a bit tubby and that seems to be the only way of keeping fit, these days.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay: Do you think dang likes bikes?
Thing is, it's more like when you've been using the Web for years and you meet someone who's never used it and they go, "Yeah, I'm quite happy looking things up in the library, and booking my holidays in Lunn Poly, and buying my records in Sainsbury's and I've got a very nice penfriend, so why would I want the Web? Eh?"
And you're like, FFS!
I get that with bikes and commuting, see. It makes no sense at all to me that someone who works within ten miles of their house should use a car or a bus or a train. It just does not commute. Especially in London, which is a beautiful city above ground, and a large selection of sewers underground, some with train tracks running through them.
Edit: That should say, "it does not compute" of course, but I'll leave the error for everyone to laugh at.
[ 08.07.2005, 07:05: Message edited by: dang65 ]
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
dang, I've got a quick bike conundrum for you if you will: I currently have a bike that lives on my balcony because the neighbours complained when it was out in the communal hall and it doesn't fit anywhere else in my flat. My friend gave it to me for my birthday. It's ok but needs a service as the front brake doesn't work at all and the back brake sticks a bit, the gears are all rusted so don't work and it doesn't have any lights. My nearest bike repair / service shop is several miles away down busy roads and I don't want to cycle on the roads until aforementioned problems have been fixed.
Simple, just walk it down to the shop, get it serviced, pick it up and happy riding, right? Wrong. To get your bike serviced you can't book an appointment but you have to turn up on specified weekdays at 8am on a first come first served basis and hope they pick your bike to work on. If not the whole process must be repeated again (after you have walked your bike back home / to work again). I would have to leave at about 6am to walk to the bike shop for 8am. Basically I can't be bothered. What should I do?
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: Basically I can't be bothered. What should I do?
Take your bike on a flight to Holland. Go to the nearest bike repair shop which are ten a penny over here. Cycle back to the airport. Fly home.
Easy!
Posted by H1ppychick (Member # 529) on :
buy a new bike. and lol at Thorn, excellent.
Posted by Gemini (Member # 428) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Well, we of the Secret Group Of Secretly Encouraging People To Get On A Fucking Bike For A Change are a bit disappointed with the results I must say.
Newsreader: "Everyone's struggling to get home this evening..."
Me: "...apart from those with bicycles..."
N: "...thousands of people are walking slowly along the road...
M: "...apart from the ones riding bicycles..."
N: "...most of them will get home very late tonight..."
M: "...apart from the ones with bikes who will get home at exactly the same time as they do every fucking night..."
N: "...etc etc."
I cycle to work 4 days out of 5. Of course the bloody terrorists would pick the same day I decide not to cycle into work as the day to try and wreak burning fear and chaos. Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
Dang, your wheels are going round!
Hahaha. I always hated that joke'.
What other hilarious kid's japes can the forum think of?
Also: As a hekalopter flew hovered over Shoreditch High Street today, a young boy jumped out of a doorway and shouted "BANG!" at the top of his little lungs. Brilliant!
Posted by Gemini (Member # 428) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: dang, I've got a quick bike conundrum for you if you will: I currently have a bike that lives on my balcony because the neighbours complained when it was out in the communal hall and it doesn't fit anywhere else in my flat. My friend gave it to me for my birthday. It's ok but needs a service as the front brake doesn't work at all and the back brake sticks a bit, the gears are all rusted so don't work and it doesn't have any lights. My nearest bike repair / service shop is several miles away down busy roads and I don't want to cycle on the roads until aforementioned problems have been fixed.
Simple, just walk it down to the shop, get it serviced, pick it up and happy riding, right? Wrong. To get your bike serviced you can't book an appointment but you have to turn up on specified weekdays at 8am on a first come first served basis and hope they pick your bike to work on. If not the whole process must be repeated again (after you have walked your bike back home / to work again). I would have to leave at about 6am to walk to the bike shop for 8am. Basically I can't be bothered. What should I do?
Buy this book: And spend an enjoyable evening covered in oil, drinking wine and fixing it yourself.
[ 08.07.2005, 07:16: Message edited by: Gemini ]
Posted by H1ppychick (Member # 529) on :
what is this book whichof you speak?
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
quote:Originally posted by jonesy999: Also: As a hekalopter flew hovered over Shoreditch High Street today, a young boy jumped out of a doorway and shouted "BANG!" at the top of his little lungs. Brilliant!
My hero
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by H1ppychick: what is this book whichof you speak?
I thought it was just me. I was like: hey wow an invisible book.
Posted by discodamage (Member # 66) on :
quote:Originally posted by jonesy999:
Also: As a hekalopter flew hovered over Shoreditch High Street today, a young boy jumped out of a doorway and shouted "BANG!" at the top of his little lungs. Brilliant!
lolololol. thats the spirit!
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: Basically I can't be bothered. What should I do?
Are there any bike shops here that are nearish to your house?
Or, if your bike's in a really terrible state and might cost a lot to fix then might it be worth buying a cheap new one to get you going? I don't know how much you spend on transport, but I'm fairly confident that a bike costing around a 100 quid or even less will have paid for itself within a couple of months.
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
Discodamage, can you please write a long, quirky, funny post about a Bristolian's experience of yesterday's events. To cheer me up. Please.
Posted by Gemini (Member # 428) on :
quote:Originally posted by New Way Of Decay:
quote:Originally posted by H1ppychick: what is this book whichof you speak?
I thought it was just me. I was like: hey wow an invisible book.
Well the image tag is definetly in the original post. *shrugs*
There is a seperate one for road bikes as well, if that is what you have.
[ 08.07.2005, 07:25: Message edited by: Gemini ]
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
quote:Originally posted by Gemini: Well the image tag is definetly in the original post.
Yeah, I couldn't understand it, but I thought it said 'Zen and the art of...' which I thought would be totally cool. If your bike broke, you could fan your breath with two fingers and bicycle engineer would come down from the sky on a pink cloud with machine guns.
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
Ooo excellent I like the sound of trying to do it myself and then making a complete hash of it so having to take it to one of the bike shops in the list which dang helpfully provided. Thanks dang and gemini! Posted by discodamage (Member # 66) on :
quote:Originally posted by jonesy999: Discodamage, can you please write a long, quirky, funny post about a Bristolian's experience of yesterday's events. To cheer me up. Please.
oh how i wish i could jonesy but i didnt have a very funny or quirky day, except for when i was trying to charge my mobile so i could chase down all my mates and they wouldnt let me because my phone is an LG and noone has a charger for it, not even the people who bastard well sold it to me. and some Pollard pushed in front of me in the queue because he reallly needed to buy the new hellomoto 3865 binglybonglyfone which turns itself invisible when muggers are around and has a tiny band of japanese micromidgets who sing the top 40 most popular ringtones backwards at you when someone is trying to make a call and immediately informs you if anyone called mortimer is within a 5 mile radius. and i was all like, hand to brow, dont you understand, my need is greater than yours, i am a londoner, i need to check my loved ones are not dying or dead. so when they told me they couldnt charge my phone i thought oh my god what do i do now! so i went and had a fag and a greggs vegetable pasty. which was really very nice, as a matter of fact. so theres one discovery i made: when your beloved home city is being attacked my bommz and strewn with guts and muck and you are feeling all too distant from it all, that is the perfect time to eat a greggs pasty. reassurance in larden form.
mostly i just felt a bit miz and shooken up by the whole thing. got a bit pissed, wrote some maudlin stuff about how much i love london, watched some roy and hg, spoke to my bessie who dealt with the whole day in the aftermath of the 2012 bid team party she attended the day before, felt immensely proud of my friend who has spent the last four years coordinating the Royal london's risk management plan, whilst saying 'of course, itll never happen'... she is my Londoner of The Month. ultim8 propz and ree-speck to her.
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
You wrote 'Pollard', which is good enough for me. Posted by omikin (Member # 37) on :
quote:Originally posted by jonesy999: You wrote 'Pollard', which is good enough for me.
you're obsessed, jonesy!
forget it, you're never going to meet her.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
that was useless. i knew there was a reason i was taking a break.
[ 08.07.2005, 09:43: Message edited by: doc d ]
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
my theory: it was australians. wanting to keep quiet about the fact we could "do them" in the cricket this year.
[ 08.07.2005, 11:06: Message edited by: doc d ]
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: Secret Organisation Group of al-Qaeda of Jihad Organisation in Europe
Is he wearing a stocking-mask?
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
no he's naturally brown. you racist.
Posted by sabian (Member # 6) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: burnt down London in 1666 because they had plans for a better one.
I know builders in this country take the piss when it comes to finishing a job on time... But 339 years is just going too far!
Posted by Travelling Canadian (Member # 491) on :
It was the Canadians. We're tired of being in the shadow of the Americans...they blamed us, you know, for harbouring the 9-11 bombers. Oh, and we wanted to get rid of all the tourists so we can come and visit next month.
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
![[Mad]](mad.gif)
Kilroy-Silk was right all along.
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
