2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
5. err
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever? tony allen
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why? bad dean stanton from battlestar galactica
3. Do you Blog? To what end? no
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO? idiot boy
5. err ahem
6. Okay, what are you wearing today? job interview clothes. black pants, black gazelles, grey sweater, white shirt. adidas zip thru that makes me look like a scal.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
1. The guy from Elcka was a bit special.
2. Home and Away because of the scenery and easy going atmos. I'd be a murderer/cult leader.
3. No.
4. I'm not sure really. As an irritating cunt?
5. I put a blind up last night. Drilling through the metal lintel with a poorly chosen bit caused it to turn red hot, which was quite exciting.
6. Baggy BigStar jeans, a small brown T-shirt and a tight charcoal jumper, lightly coated in white cat fur.
[ 01.06.2007, 05:04: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
1. Phil "crazy arms" Collins
2. I don't know. Winston from Eastenders? Seems like hanging around drinking.
3. Ehh, well, there's writing on the internet here and there, and I did write about computer games on a computer games website blog but no, not in the true sense of the word. Not at the moment. It's all about the twitter.com, G.
4.fingers down a blackboard
5. ah...what?
6. oh man, I'm wearing a classic shirt from 2006. I saw a photo of me wearing it the other day and I was like you know what, that shirt doesn't look so bad. I pulled it out today and it's got like a iron smudge on it and, frikkin', a bit of yellow under the arms, but it feels good to give the baby an airing. The shirt is fine blue and white check - some of you may have seen it. I've teamed that grey strides and some black shoes. I'm totally office today. Porno. Strides smell a bit smokey cause I wore them last night. Kickin it in a gay bar.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever? Kenny Jones. Small Faces, Faces and chosen as the man to replace Moon in the Who. That's quite a track record.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why? The Sopranos as Drunken Brit at the Bing.
3. Do you Blog? To what end? No. But, I've registered a domain name. Step in the right/wrong direction.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO? Like: More like:
5. err Waiting for a delivery. Then taking the Masketeers out. Umming, errring and ahhhing about what to do today. Any suggestions?
6. Okay, what are you wearing today? Blue low-rise Cons, dark blue shorts, farting dog Mambo t-shirt.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
Is that "Who," supposed to be a hint? Well it won't work on me as I can't stand Keith Moon's drumming. And I won't be Led by subliminal messages anyway... Ooh, another name has just popped into my head. The correct answer is John Bonham.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
There was a series many years ago called Tales Of The Gold Monkey which was set in a time and place which has always seemed terribly romantic to me, even though it was probably really shit in real life. That is, in the 1930s in the South Pacific. It had a mixture of French and American characters and the main character flew a sea plane, which I also find wonderfully romantic. I'd play a character in that, possibly a former Foreign Legionnaire with a very suspicious past. I'd mainly prop up the bar and look grizzled.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
I don't, but I do have a bit of an obsession with good and bad things that humans have invented over the last five million years or whatever and I have been thinking of starting some sort of website which would detail the things I think we should keep (canals, bicycles, the internet etc) and the things we should banish (private cars, cheap flights, CCTV etc). This could develop into an enormous, endless series of pointless rants which no one with any sense would ever read. A blog in other words.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
Like to think, or realistically think? I think I'm probably seen as a complete idiot, and the same goes on a couple of other sites I go to. (I've just spent nearly a week single handedly arguing in favour of road pricing on a site crammed with hopelessly devoted drivers.) I like to think that I just about come up with enough good posts to be entitle me to be tolerated though. I suppose that applies to a lot of people really.
5. err
I think I've erred quite enough already really. Possibly to an inhuman extent.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Nah.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
Charles Dickens
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
Soph from Attachments. She was hott!
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
No. To the end.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
As a really great exciting, dynamic, witty, attractive, insightful, intelligent kinda guy.
5. err
I'm not sure. Might take the girls swimming tomorrow, at either Ilkley Lido or Bolton Abbey. Or Newby Hall. Or Knaresborough.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Nothing exciting. Black shoes, brown cords, purple shirt.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
i dunno mart, that sounds fairly exciting a get up to me.
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
Benny - pf damnit.
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
I'm with Jimmy, it's gotta be Phil Collins.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
Random girl in Northern Exposure, preferably Chris the DJs girlfriend.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
Nah, can't be arsed.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
I think I'm probably too quiet for anyone to have much of an opinion of me (400 posts in 5 years!).
5. err
'Err' pretty much sums up my mood today.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Currently a rather fetching red fluffy dressing gown, complete with hood - I'm not working for a couple of weeks in between finishing temping and my permanent job starting, so am taking full advance by being a lazy sod.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
quote:Originally posted by doc d: i dunno mart, that sounds fairly exciting a get up to me.
Well that's nice. Do you think it makes me sound like an exciting, dynamic, witty, attractive, insightful, intelligent kinda guy?
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
John Bonham/Keith Moon - can't decide. Also I saw this band once supporting Electric Eel Shock and their drummer truly captivated me - amazing and a shame I forgot their name
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
Mike from Spaced.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
I do have website but its currently buggared, although I post on it seldomnly
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
I'd like to think people don't think I am a twat, though I don't hold out much hope
5. err
Yes isn't it?
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Therapy? Hail Satan you rock tee. Black Levis, Black Coverse All Stars.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
yeah, it takes some cojones to step out in purple.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
I'm like an archbishop with attitude, man.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
exactly what bignuts said.
its a statment that says "i am not dull, nor am i one of those dullards that thinks a 10 pound comedy tie buys me a personality. i have wit, style, panache and a certain sense of je ne sais quoi"
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
an archbishop with big balls. Hanging out.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Big balls are mitre-ier than the sword.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
a purple shirt says "I'm here to kick ass and take names. Outta my way, bitch."
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
black shoes brown cords is a good switch of the brown shoes black cords look.
ballsy.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
Brown cords and a purple shirt? What are you sponsored by Cadburys or something? hahahahah
I'm wearing a black T-shirt with yellow space invaders on the front, loose fit blue Zoo-York jeans, and white Osiris trainers.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
quote:Originally posted by doc d: ballsy.
you're not kidding. Mart's making all the ladies cry today.
[ 01.06.2007, 06:01: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Maybe I should have worn purple shoes to match the shirt, though?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I don't think so.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
That's good, because I don't have any purple shoes.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I bet at least one person here used to own a pair of purple DM's though. The **** .
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
I'm thinking VoPo.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
it wasn't me. i guarantee it.
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
I can totally see jimmy and damo hosting a programme to give people advise on clothes, how ballsy they are and how porno they make you look, it'd be great.
Oh and yeah, guilty as charged on the purple DM thing.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
I had cherry DMs. Which I painted interesting and unique designs on, and wore withg flowing, tassel ended skirts, or opaque black tights and tiny denim shorts.
What were the questions again?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I think VOIP has admitted to it before hasn't she?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
I used to have a huge crush on a girl who wore purple DMs with rainbow stitching and laces.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
my old girlfriend had normal DMs, but - but she had painted - she painted flames on the side. That is not porno. It's a year's worth of The Lady.
[ 01.06.2007, 06:13: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
were the words "wonder stuff" and other indie bands and flowers painted on these shoes?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
I don’t know. Er. I quite liked the one in Queensryche, because his kit was massive and held together with loads of chains and shit. And something about Lars Ulrich makes me laugh. Does that count?
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why? Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Just for the Spike ogling, really. I don’t think I’d like Sunnydale and the demons and all that, but I could hang around the graveyard quite efficiently. I’ve been hanging round graveyards all my life.
3. Do you Blog? To what end? Not anymore. I had a short-lived one when I broke my foot and had cock all to do, but it kind of petered out when I got mobile again. I wonder if it’s still there?
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO? How I’d like to think I was thought of on TMO? Erm. As not as miserablist as I might first appear.
5. err Ah.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today? Ankle length chocolate linen skirt, spiky toed flat brown shoes, cream top, cream linen jacket. I’m pretending it’s summer. Manchester begs to disagree.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
I don't know - I find it quite hard to compare drummers... I mean, it isn't like comparing singers or guitarists, is it? Bash bang crash - that's all there is to it, really-surely? I can certainly understand why so many bands, as soon as technology allowed, replaced their drummer with a fucking machine - seriously, bit of a hint there, eh drummers?
All that said, the guy out of Def Leppard has to take the cake for only having one arm and still sounding no worse than 90% of the other drummers out there which, again, I think is a pretty damning indictment of drummers.
My least favourite Muppet was always Animal. If he was so rad, why the hell was he playing in some showbiz-style big band rather than an LA hardcore group, eh? Fucking fake.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
It would have been ace being Colonel Decker's driver in The A-Team - every week you get to flip your car as BA out-drives you in the A-Team Van (furnished by GMC Truck) and yet however spectacular the crash, you never get injured. Super-sweet.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
The blog currently seems to me to be one of the worst, most psychically-corrosive inventions of all time. Bound to be succeeded by something even worse, which I await with suitable dread.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
Aspire...
Actual...
5. err
Trimming hedges, writing, enjoying a bit of 'me-time' as the family are away.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Shorts, sandals, black and yellow thick-stripled polo shirt - like some sort of massive bee.
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
I could never be arsed with laces so my DMs were held together with coloured elastic bands, randomly covered with sparkly nail varnish and totally beaten up.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
quote:Originally posted by doc d: were the words "wonder stuff" and other indie bands and flowers painted on these shoes?
I had a pair of trainers with massive tongues on which I wrote Metallica in black biro.
Classy.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
did you try and to the M and the A like how they do it?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Yes.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
The bloke in Jimi Hendrix Experience - he somehow manages to stand out as a musician even against Jimi.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
Sopranos would be great for the sheer quality of it, but it'd be great to roll into something like Neighbours like some nasty british version of Christian Slater in heathers, telling Mrs Mangle to keep her fucking nose out of it and smaking Paul or something. Acutally, a combination of the two would be great - turning up in Neighbours as Ralphie from Sopranos would be something.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
I'm trying to start doing it - just to get myself back into the practice of writing.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
An oddity from barbelith? I too would love to be something of a cross between Patrick Number 6 Prisoner man, George Clooney and Errol Flyn, probably more like Ben Afflick in rehab, the boss eyed guy from Ghostbusters 2 and Chewbacca.
5. err
How am I supposed to be motivated to work as a temp, when I'm the only person in the office?
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
Brown shoes (timberland, in a camper style I guess) jeans, a stripped white/brown shirt, a mustard tie and a grey jumper - all wrapped up in my ubiquitous grey herringbone blazer.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Yes.
ouch. Still, the thought of you wearing them, giving blowjobs to boys on buses is arousing.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
The nineties are giving me desk.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
I've got NWoD's phone at the moment. I promised to post it back to him today, but before I do, does anyone want to suggest who I should text, pretending to be the boy television?
Posted by H1ppychick (Member # 529) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
dunno. despite the fact that as a teenager, i always fancied the 'rhythm section' (fnar fnar), rather than the singer in any of my favourite bands, i really couldn't tell you what makes a good drummer stand out and therefore what gives me whump. i know, let's say tre cool. that's slightly different from previous.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why?
i'd like to be charlie from charlie's angels. did eff all and took all the credit, what a dude.
3. Do you Blog? To what end?
nope. that would require some kind of a) writing skill and b) commitment, neither of which i have.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
i'd like to think of myself of being a random occasional lance of incisive wit. however, in reality, i'm a dwindling bored one-liner.
5. err
yes, quite.
6. Okay, what are you wearing today?
grey trousers, green short-sleeved shirt, black, heeled shoes. general silverware. curly hair (needs cutting)
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever? Disableds in general - either the one-armed one out of Def Leppard, or Evelyn Glennie. Not bad for a deaf.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why? The token Brit in Sex and the City, to make everyone look good in comparison to my bad teeth, all-over lard and shit hair.
3. Do you Blog? To what end? No. 0.1% of them are amusing or useful, and I fear mine would be neither.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO? Like to be: witty older sexpot who speaks strong truth. In actuality: tedious mildly desperate whinger.
5. err What's best? Overworked tedium with regular income and someone to blame when it goes wrong, or freedom of contract work with attendant responsibility?
6. Okay, what are you wearing today? Long brown crinkly skirt, orange and pink stripy t-shirt, flowery birkenstocks. Christ, what a hideous combination.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: I've got NWoD's phone at the moment. I promised to post it back to him today, but before I do, does anyone want to suggest who I should text, pretending to be the boy television?
Panama.
[ 01.06.2007, 06:39: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
panama or panorama?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
hang on, let me just read my post again.
~
Yeah, I said Panama.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
quote:Originally posted by missgolightly: I can totally see jimmy and damo hosting a programme to give people advise on clothes, how ballsy they are and how porno they make you look, it'd be great.
Looking Porno with Big Nuts and the Doc, ITV, weekday mornings
Big Nuts: Hello everyone and welcome once again to Looking Porno, the show that makes you look porno. Hi Doc!
The Doc: Hi Jimmy. Today we’ve got a special programme, all about the colour purple.
Big Nuts: And yes, Whoopi Goldberg will be here later!
(Audience): lol
The Doc: So, yeah, purple, right?
Big Nuts: Oh yeah.
The Doc: What’s that all about, then?
Big Nuts: Well, it’s not normally a colour that gets much attention in the fashion world. Purple, you might say, is the drummer of fashion.
The Doc: The drummer of fashion?
Big Nuts: Yes. Like the one-armed guy from Def Leppard – what was his name?
The Doc: Richard Clayderman.
Big Nuts: That’s him. He always looked sharp, didn’t he.
The Doc: Like a fucking razor, Jimmy.
Big Nuts: He was like a big purple phallus of fashion, Doc, that’s our Clayders.
The Doc: Actually, I’m just being told that Richard Clayderman wasn’t the drummer from Def Leppard.
Big Nuts: He was probably too purple for them.
The Doc: Well, I’m not sure he was purple at all.
Big Nuts: What? That’s insane. How the fuck are we supposed to run a whole show on purple, for fuck’s sake, if no fucker is going to fucking purple up for us. Jesus.
The Doc: Yeah, I know, man, but listen, we’ve got a guest now, VoPo McPony, she’s here to tell us about what the colour means for her, which is, y’know, quite important.
Big Nuts: Okay, that’s good. Hello, VoPo.
VoPo: Hi.
The Doc: Nice shoes.
Big Nuts: Yeah, those purple Doc Marten’s are totally porno. They make you look like a kind of hippy archbishop, with big purple balls. That’s rad.
The Doc: It’s the works.
Big Nuts: You look jazz.
The Doc: Rocking.
Big Nuts: You’re colour, baby. Colour.
The Doc: Lace me up, VoPo. Purple me all over.
Big Nuts: You’re shooting purple bullets right into the beating heart of shoeland.
The Doc: Booty.
Big Nuts: That look is so purple and so fashion, it’s not purple, it’s… it’s… man…
The Doc: ...it’s le purp, baby.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
lolol
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
how much is a lol worth these days? lol (x current exchange rate)
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
LOL
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
quote:Originally posted by Jimmy Big Nuts: hang on, let me just read my post again.
~
Yeah, I said Panama.
that's a lot of texting misc will need to do.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
man, that show would be awesome. I'm seeing it as like a cheap US tv show from the early eighties, when people were still wearing seventies gear. Like how people dress in early cronenburg films. Orangey beige background and brown chairs, and two guys with quite soft American accents, lots of hair and moustaches. And it should be watched via a video tape so the title music is a bit wobbly. And it'll have early video effects flashing on the screen to introduce people and segments. And a sweet production company ident at the beginning that sort of zooms on the screen with a bad sythny zoom sound. Porno.
eta: does anybody else think that the best thing about the eighties are the early idents / logos for video distribution and production companies? And when in films from the eighties a character watches some kind of keep fit tv show with chicks in spandex and massive blonde hair. That is also the best thing about the eighties.
[ 01.06.2007, 07:00: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
nobody else feeling that, huh.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Images of The Gong Show are coming to my mind, for some reason.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
I hated the 80's Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
you ruin everything, benny.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
I wasn't keen, really.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart: Images of The Gong Show are coming to my mind, for some reason.
Thanks mart. I'm going to be thinking about Gene Gene the Dancing Machine for the rest of the day....
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
I was only 8 when the 90s came along so I don't remember a whole bunch about the 80s, beyond playing on a Commodore 64 and hearing some slightly dodgy music.
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: I was only 8 when the 90s came along so I don't remember a whole bunch about the 80s, beyond playing on a Commodore 64 and hearing some slightly dodgy music.
Hangs self with bootlace tie Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
quote:Originally posted by Jimmy Big Nuts: you ruin everything, benny.
Sorry Big Nuts.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Why are you called Benny the Ball, Benny? Is it some testicle-related thing? Are you, in fact, one of Jimmy Benway's big purple nuts?
Or is just some stupid alliteration thing. Or are you the belle of the ball. Are you round like a ball. What sort of a ball are you. Do people have a ball when you're around. What is it.
Posted by Zygote (Member # 883) on :
Perhaps it's down to his love for...
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
oh yeah, fortune city is the best. I recently got them to delete a website I made in 1999 that still seemed to turn up if you googled my name.
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever? I have no idea, but my favourites would be, in reverse order 3.
2. Sebastien Grainger from Death From Above 1979 (left). I don't think he's that good at drumming but then again he sings at the same time, that must be hard, also their band sounds major loud and there's only two of them. Amazing. Also Moustaches.
3. Stereophonics drummer (now ex?). I've always admired his hair and he always seemed unhinged whenever I saw him on TV. But mainly because of his hair.
2. If you could be a recurring bit part character in any television series, which and why? Hmnn, good question... I'd quite like to be Rod out of Rod, Jane and Freddy from Rainbow (80s childs TV). I'm sure he was having it away with Jane, and I'm sure she was a filthy slut.
3. Do you Blog? To what end? In my head I have created a joint blog with Benway, with occassional contributions from Jonesy, Elvis and London, it rapidly became popular, mostly due to London's internet connections and Benway and Jonesy and Elvis' writing skills. I've also got some recognition for the graphics I've provided. We're experimenting with films now and I'm experimenting with type, vector images and shots of black ink expanding in water, and spending ages deliberating over soundtracks. We've got mentioned and linked to on some major sites but I'm rapidly becoming bored with the whole thing. The short answer though is NO.
4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO? Alright? Sometimes bordering on "ok", mostly though I don't think about it.
5. err *blank*
6. Okay, what are you wearing today? Green T-shirt with white logo, Jeans, Blue Vans Hi-tops, Black trunk pants, black socks, Sure roll on deodorant, no watch, no ring (forgot).
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
black trunk pants are the only underwear.
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
What, even for girls?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: 1. Who, in your mind is the best drummer ever?
#1:
#2:
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: 3. Do you Blog? To what end?
No, but my wife is an avid blogger. It's pretty much how I keep up with what's happening at home.
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: 4. How do you like to think that you are thought of on TMO?
I'm loved by all. I mean loathed, but only by some. Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
quote:Originally posted by missgolightly: What, even for girls?
who cares what girls wear.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: No, but my wife is an avid blogger.
Link?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
quote:Originally posted by ralph: No, but my wife is an avid blogger.
Link?
Yeah. Right.
But here's one of the images posted in her most recent entry:
[ 01.06.2007, 09:42: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
you need to change your pool water.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
it's a trampoline you idiot
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
lol. that kid looks like he's about to fall in as well, balancing very precariously on the edge.
a bit like his dad.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Anyone know Ralph's wife's name?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I wouldn't want to fall in that. What's all that white crap?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart: lol. that kid looks like he's about to fall in as well, balancing very precariously on the edge.
it's a trampoline you idiot.
quote:Originally posted by mart: a bit like his dad.
lol. yeah.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Anyone know Ralph's wife's name?
I bet Ralph does. Unless he never fancied her enough to learn her name.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
I thought you had a beard Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
That's not me. That's number two son. He's not standing on the edge of a pool, he's in mid-air, the result of bouncing on a trampoline. The white stuff is simply sunlight coming through the trees. There's no water in the picture. Of course I know my wife's name. I do have a beard.
eta:
[ 01.06.2007, 09:59: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Well if we can't read Ralph's Wife's Blog, could someone with talent please write what they imagine RW would post on her B?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I wouldn't have put the trampoline so close to the pool.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
Heh...here's one of me trying to move a one or two ton rock (rough estimate based on one hundred pounds per cubic foot). I blame the prozac on this one...I was utterly consumed with getting this fucking rock out of the way. I finally did, but it took hours. Stupid prozac.
[ 01.06.2007, 10:03: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
that picture's been doctored. The angles are all wrong.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
can you post a picture of your bearded face?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It hasn't been doctored. What's wrong with the angle?
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
if you look at the rock, the plank and the jack, it's like the perspective is different on all of them.
Posted by SilverGinger5 (Member # 49) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph:
Looking at the image properties, it appears ralph has called his son Trampo. That's a bit weird ralph.
[ 01.06.2007, 10:07: Message edited by: SilverGinger5 ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by SilverGinger5: Looking at the image properties, it appears ralph has called his son Trampo. That's a bit weird ralph.
Short for trampoline you freak. And now I'm not going to post a beard picture!
eta: I named the picture trampo. My sons name isn't Trampoline.
[ 01.06.2007, 10:10: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
Here's the sawbuck I built last weekend. It's for holding logs. You know, to cut them into firewood.
[ 01.06.2007, 10:13: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by SilverGinger5 (Member # 49) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: Here's the sawbuck I built last weekend. It's for holding logs. You know, to cut them into firewood.
You could probably use it for you know, holding someone's leg or arm in as well ralph.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
is that the frame for the roof of your house? it looks tiny.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart: is that the frame for the roof of your house? it looks tiny.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: That's number two son.
Because you don't love him enough as number one?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
quote:Originally posted by ralph: That's number two son.
Because you don't love him enough as number one?
No. He was born second.
[ 01.06.2007, 10:19: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
why is everyone trying to break ralph today?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
Really. All I do is give and give and give and this is the thanks I get. Bunch of *****.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Sorry - I wrote enough rather than as much because I was posting whilst communicating on the telephone.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
beard picture please.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
no
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Wife blog link. Now!
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
lol. no.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
come on ralph.
Posted by missgolightly (Member # 34) on :
pretty please
Posted by Zygote (Member # 883) on :
With cocaine on top.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart: Why are you called Benny the Ball, Benny? Is it some testicle-related thing? Are you, in fact, one of Jimmy Benway's big purple nuts?
Or is just some stupid alliteration thing. Or are you the belle of the ball. Are you round like a ball. What sort of a ball are you. Do people have a ball when you're around. What is it.
Sigh.
Benny the Ball was the round, dumb one on Top Cat - I pretend to be round and dumb - but in actualality I am more like Fancy Fancy or Spook if I were to be likened to anthropormorphic Hannah Barbera cat, but Fancy Fancy didn't work and Spook just seemed wrong.
It has very little to do with testicles.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Zygote: With cocaine on top.
lol
snorts cocaine. relapses. kills family. takes own life. Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
i was about to say "that will make for interesting reading on the wife's blog", but of course she'd be dead, because you'd killed her.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: kills family.
Not number one, surely?
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Not number one, surely?
I assumed that's what Ralph's numbering system was put in place for. I think it was in a 1950s public information film:
Citizens of the United States should prepare carefully for an invasion by the Communists or, if you're watching this in the future, the Hippies, or even further in the future, the Muslims.
1. Build a small roof for each member of your family.
2. Fill all swimming pools with Guinness, or other locally available stout.
3. Number the members of your family so that they know which order you will have to kill them in when the Communists arrive. Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It's a reference to the old Charlie Chan films...
quote: Charlie Chan is a fictional Chinese-American detective created by Earl Derr Biggers, reportedly in part under inspiration from the career of Chang Apana. Chan is the hero of a number of books and dozens of movies. At first a sergeant (but later promoted) in the Honolulu Police Department, he and his wife have fourteen children (the oldest of which is colloquially known as "Number One Son") and live in a house on Punchbowl Hill. He is a large man but moves gracefully.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
Don't be ridiculous Ralph. It would take ages to kill fourteen of them.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
We have access to guns here in the states.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Guns don't kill people, ralph.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: We have access to guns here in the states.
Hmm, that's true. We only have cricket bats. Unbelievably time consuming.
[ 01.06.2007, 11:46: Message edited by: dang65 ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
Man, I can't imagine living in a world without guns.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: Man, I can't imagine living in a world without guns.
What would be so bad about it?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
How would you quickly and efficiently kill people? The thought of using a cricket bat seems a bit too hands-on...
[ 01.06.2007, 12:03: Message edited by: ralph ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Killing people is stupid, ralph.
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
e coli
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
myxamatosis
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
bombs made out of nails, plastic lunch boxes and chapati flour
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
We blew off the delivery. Went to the park and played frisbee, then went to the pub. Going down into the yard for a water fight, now.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
alright The Niffer?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It's not like I can just stroll into the local WalMart and purchase e coli.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: It's not like I can just stroll into the local WalMart and purchase e coli.
Oh I thought WalMart was sort of like ASDA.
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
No, you're right I wouldn't expect American meat to be that cultured.
{i]puches self in italics because that's what all the cool kids are doing nowadays right?[/i]
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
fucks up UBB
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
alright JBN?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Niffer: No, you're right I wouldn't expect American meat to be that cultured.
Christ Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Niffer: bombs made out of nails, plastic lunch boxes and chapati flour
Darryn's going to be pissed when he finds out you've been posting bomb making instructions on his Internet Message Board.
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: Christ
Ah, my number 57858585960606083733674985950505696867638392822201 son.
You called?
[ 01.06.2007, 12:20: Message edited by: Niffer ]
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
quote:Originally posted by Niffer: bombs made out of nails, plastic lunch boxes and chapati flour
Darryn's going to be pissed when he finds out you've been posting bomb making instructions on his Internet Message Board.
S'alright, I left out the bit that says "buy detonator from Maplin".
[ 01.06.2007, 12:23: Message edited by: Niffer ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Phew!
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
A group of stuckup ***** on horses just gave me a right filthy look. I was cycling home as usual, and I see these horses coming the other way, so I slow down and dismount so as not to bomb past them and spook the horses. As they went past, I gave them a nice smile, as everyone smiles at everyone along the canal and I was full of the joys of summer, and all three of the ***** shot me this look as if I was a piece of shit. I couldn't believe it. I should have thrown my bike at them.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: I should have thrown my bike at them.
Or shot them.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
you should have leg-swept the horses.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
If you catch it just right, you could probably knock a horse out with one punch. probably.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
fuck it man, let the ***** on horses stare at you. let it go.
Posted by Nathan Bleak (Member # 1040) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph:
quote:Originally posted by SilverGinger5: Looking at the image properties, it appears ralph has called his son Trampo. That's a bit weird ralph.
Short for trampoline you freak. And now I'm not going to post a beard picture!
eta: I named the picture trampo. My sons name isn't Trampoline.
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