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» TMO Talk » Life » New Arrival (Page 2)

 
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Author Topic: New Arrival
McDirts
TMO Member
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cAPS LOCK THIS. fag.
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Thorn Davis

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You just don't care who you offend, do you?
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McDirts
TMO Member
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the gays, the caps lock nazis, the zionists, small caucasian babies, THE 18 YEAR OLD ALICE - YES YOU,READING THIS NOW!! Do I offend you, yeah?
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ralph

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oH mCdIRTS [Frown]
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McDirts
TMO Member
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Jesus.
Sorry.
I'M REALLY SORRY. tHORN, aLICE, bm, Ralph

Christ, the caps locks have come back... I'm fucking up left, right and centre.
Sorry.

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Sidney
Her Glorious Reneging Brumness
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Just popped in to check on the Hoibster and couldn't resist saying a mahooosive congratulations to Thorn and Octavia! She is absolutely gorgeous. Well done to Octavia too on what sounds like a really good delivery. Yays all round, in fact.

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They give you a pen as fat as a modest cock and you're expected to dab it on the page, as though you were mopping the dregs of an afternoon Tommy.

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herbs

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Sidders! Here I am! Vast and immobile, and permanently attached to a bottle of Gaviscon.

I want more pictures of infant and dewey-eyed parents. If you could leave out any tales about tearing ladies' areas, I'd be grateful.

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Octavia
I hate Valentine's Day.
Stupid commercialised crap
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quote:
Originally posted by herbs:
permanently attached to a bottle of Gaviscon.

Yeah, I was going through half a litre a week up until - ooh, last Friday. The Boots stuff is pretty decent too. It got to the point I was worried about eating anywhere but at home unless I knew I had access to calcium carbonate.

No stitches! It was pretty horrible in the last hour without pain relief, but do-able. Despite what I may have been swearing at the time.

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New Way Of Decay

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Good old The Crippler.

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL

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MiscellaneousFiles

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quote:
Originally posted by Octavia:
It was pretty horrible in the last hour without pain relief, but do-able. Despite what I may have been swearing at the time.

quote:
Originally posted by New Way Of Decay:
Good old The Crippler.

I think Octavia was referring to the birth rather than the conception...
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Sidney
Her Glorious Reneging Brumness
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ah yes. gaviscon. top tip - you can get prescriptions from your gp for mega bottles of the stuff and being duffed up, there is no prescription charge to pay. get in.

i am trying to find a decent newborn pic for you, hoibs. sadly, as c & e both arrived a bit early, our newborn pics of them are a bit scary.

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They give you a pen as fat as a modest cock and you're expected to dab it on the page, as though you were mopping the dregs of an afternoon Tommy.

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New Way Of Decay

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quote:
Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles:
I think Octavia was referring to the birth rather than the conception...

Happy 18th, Alice!

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL

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MiscellaneousFiles

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Time to retire the Teen-splitter monicker?
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New Way Of Decay

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Imagine it, it's a lovely Sunday afternoon and Octavia has been putting the icing on the cake. Thorn's spent all morning mowing the lawn and putting up the picnic table. The guests will be arriving any moment. Alice?! Octavia calls out. But there's no response. She looks in all the rooms. She slowly creaks up the stairs to the attic where she finds her 18 year old daughter in front of the PC. On screen is the old familiar black on white format of TMO. A picture of Thorn in his prime is displayed on the screen. The word 'Salad' is prominent. 'We...were going to tell you' she blurts, half confession, half assertion. 'of course you were!' She shrieks back. 'Of course you were mother. When? Just before I found it?! How could you hide this from me?' From dowstairs Thorn's soft voice can be heard. 'What is it my love?! What's all the noise?' Alice pushes past Octavia and scampers down into the arms of her father. 'What is it?' He asks softly as she buries her face into his chest. His face is gentle but tender. A wry smile creeps across his face with a glint in his eye. 'Is it The Chain, by Fleetwood Mac' he says? quietly.

[ 14.05.2009, 12:21: Message edited by: New Way Of Decay ]

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL

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Thorn Davis

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I'm not going to hide TMO from Alice. As far as I'm concerned she can use it for Show and Tell at school. I'd be delighted.
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New Way Of Decay

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That's going to be the equivelant of dangs kid bringing in a wooden top or stick and hoop.

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL

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Thorn Davis

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You know, despite the lies Benway tells about The Kids being down with technology and getting textbooks beamed into the back of their eyelids and all the rest of it, I haven't actually witnessed any suggestion that the younger generations are any more au fait with tech than their parents. We get a steady stream of interns through here, and for the most part they are clueless about technology. Terrified of opening the database, and unable even to operate the franking machine. I think Twitter and iTunes and all the rest of them are mainly used by fat men aged 30 and over. This is based on a sample group of about 12 20-year old graduates, so my research is scientifically watertight.
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Black Mask

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quote:
Originally posted by Thorn Davis:
You know, despite the lies Benway tells about The Kids being down with technology and getting textbooks beamed into the back of their eyelids and all the rest of it, I haven't actually witnessed any suggestion that the younger generations are any more au fait with tech than their parents. We get a steady stream of interns through here, and for the most part they are clueless about technology. Terrified of opening the database, and unable even to operate the franking machine. I think Twitter and iTunes and all the rest of them are mainly used by fat men aged 30 and over. This is based on a sample group of about 12 20-year old graduates, so my research is scientifically watertight.

Dude, don't you get any p/maternity leave?

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sweet

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Thorn Davis

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Two weeks, starting next Tuesday. Really looking forward to it.
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Black Mask

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Do you have a meconium story for us, yet?

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sweet

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Thorn Davis

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She shat some out. And er... her nappy was changed. The end. There haven't really been any massively amusing poo incidents.
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Black Mask

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Ah, well...

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sweet

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herbs

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quote:
Originally posted by Thorn Davis:
Two weeks, starting next Tuesday. Really looking forward to it.

Where are you going? R's thinking of the Bahamas...
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Louche
Carved TMO on her clit just to make you feel bad
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Congratulations all round. And hurrah and huzzah and things.
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London

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Congratulations! It is ace to have a baby. And you'll probably have a fun poo story soon. My fave was when my son did a projectile shit on his father's trousers. I wish I had videoed it. I've put a fiver in a trust fund for him for later.
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squeegy
'small african childe'
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Late to the party as ever but massive congrats there guys. Go team!

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supa scrub

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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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Congratulations Thorn and Octavia on your new arrival. And Alice, if this is your eighteenth birthday and you are reading this, I am the fellow whom on many occasions wanted to smack your father sharply on the nose. Before gouging out his eyes with a rusty teaspoon.

Though I am sure that this feeling was mutual.

Yours,
S. Norton.

Thorn - you will just have to print this out now.

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"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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MiscellaneousFiles

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Christ!
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froopyscot
nibbled to death by an okapi
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quote:
Originally posted by Samuelnorton:
Congratulations Thorn and Octavia on your new arrival. And Alice, if this is your eighteenth birthday and you are reading this, I am the fellow whom on many occasions wanted to smack your father sharply on the nose. Before gouging out his eyes with a rusty teaspoon.

PS: If you are reading this to your father, there is a chance this has already happened.

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Give 'em .0139 fathoms and they'll take 80 chains.

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ben

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Gorgeous little baby - congratulations to you both.
[Smile]

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Zygote
TMO's Member
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Congratulations Thorn and Octavia. [Cool]
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