quote:Originally posted by dance margarita: i have a 1500 word essay to write about the effect that images and perceptions of older people have on understandings of mental health and distress in later life.
I translate thousands of words a day on stuff like this. Immigrants more than old people, but what's the difference, right.
Posts: 7807
| IP: Logged
posted
Today, however, I have lurched between municipal representatives of the royal estate in medieval Valencia and an internal memo outlining developments in the sales and business structure of a chain of hotels.
posted
AMerican teaspoons are much larger, mostly on account of the fact they wouldn't be caught dead drinking tea. Also, their salt has a much higher salt content than ours.
Posts: 12211
| IP: Logged
Octavia
I hate Valentine's Day. Stupid commercialised crap
posted
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: AMerican teaspoons are much larger, mostly on account of the fact they wouldn't be caught dead drinking tea. Also, their salt has a much higher salt content than ours.
A teaspoon is 5ml wherever you are. And sorry - what?
Posts: 3339
| IP: Logged
posted
I have never been in a webinar, but today I was asked to give one! In return for cash! Mental…I wonder if I can make it so it isn’t dreary, pointless, and entirely un- life- affirming.
Also today I was at a workshop, and while waiting for lunch the man queuing behind me told an astonishingly dull collection of anecdotes about his life to someone else, then he sat next to me to eat and told me the exact same things. I attempted to engage in small talk as an exercise in social skills, but I didn’t rate it much. He explained how he had changed jobs in order to reduce his commute and spend more time with his family, and I was all wow you have a family. Not out loud though.
Anyway, I’m feeling pretty life affirmed now. I’m going to drink some rum under a duvet.
Posts: 2793
| IP: Logged
quote:Originally posted by Abby: small talk as an exercise in social skills
oh, i feel you. smalltalk= bullshit, overrated. but the hideousness of it is, there is no alternative. BIGTALK would be even more demoralising. imagine if that man had sat down next to you and said 'SO... tell me about the most amazing adventure youve ever had. what gives your life meaning? every day, i need to make real eye contact with a child, stare into their eyes, absorb some of the wonder, osmose some of the shining newness of it all. (theyre so in the moment, arent they, kids?) otherwise, things like the earthquake in chile just become such an unconscionable burden'. youd be like, pointing at your lunch bowl, staring into your lap, like 'dude?.... soup'.
i had a vomiting bug on thursday. i unburdened my innards three times in as many hours, mostly into the lavatory but also onto some surrounding bathroom surfaces. it was painful, undignified and unseemly, as such occasions are most often wont to be. ever since i have found myself not just unexcited by the concept of eating but have found the activity overtly challenging. today, for instance, i have had to force myself to ingest a seeded bagel and hoummus and an apple and i feel distinctly as if, and i hope youll excuse the expression, i might whole- heartedly ralph. all over my ever-loving knees. i am not very good at being ill, i find it antithetical to my completely baseless view of myself as physically invulnerable. the kicker of it is, im not even ill enough to justify loafing around in bed feeling wan and wearing layers of ill- fitting marl. also, i am so bloated i feel and look as if i have for some months been gestating a tiny defenseless baby formed of intestinal gas. pity me. i am Woe, i walk amongst you.
no progress made on the essay. stiff words with self are needed.
quote:Originally posted by Cherry In Hove: Nandos isn't free range which means you are evil.
It's not exactly free range, but customers are free to move around the pen. They seem happy enough, unless you tap on the glass.
Posts: 13758
| IP: Logged
posted
ahahahahh! Cherry was talking about the chickens that are served as food in the restaurant, but you deliberately misunderstood, and created the suggestion that the patrons are being mistreated when they go to Nandos. You then went further and suggested that the patrons are 'no better than animals' because you are on the other side of the windows, communicating with the people inside as if communicating with animals in an enclosure!
Posts: 3821
| IP: Logged
posted
Yes, there's a lot going on in that little two line post. That's my craft. It's my gift. The tiniest slice that allows you to peer into a world of surreal satire. Layers and layers of comedy, insight and - dare I say it? - genius, conjured up in just a few words, like evoking the Mona Lisa with a three line pencil drawing.
Posts: 13758
| IP: Logged
posted
Well I wasn't happy. I had to get my own cutlery and drink. Even McDonalds don't make you get your own drink. There were mums with prams all over the place, and combined with the grid of tiny two-person tables it made the restaurant into a giant sliding block puzzle. Or Bomberman if I'd been a terrorist, and the tables had been bomb-proof.
Posts: 14015
| IP: Logged
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Yes, there's a lot going on in that little two line post. That's my craft. It's my gift. The tiniest slice that allows you to peer into a world of surreal satire. Layers and layers of comedy, insight and - dare I say it? - genius, conjured up in just a few words, like evoking the Mona Lisa with a three line pencil drawing.
I have shown it to my colleagues here at work, and everybody was really impressed - great work!
Posts: 3821
| IP: Logged
posted
I showed it to my colleagues and they reckon that people in nandos are there entirely of their own free will and can leave at any time (unless they have eaten and not paid their bill) so they don't think your analogy works.
Posts: 4934
| IP: Logged
posted
After explaining to them what "Thorn Davis" had said and hearing their response, I then did try to explain to them what "Kanye West" thought about the situation but then suddenly they all seemed to become too busy to talk to me.
Posts: 4934
| IP: Logged
posted
Your colleagues are really going to have to put a bit more effort in if they want to enjoy that joke to its maximum potential. I don't just go for the easy laughs and sometimes the reader has to go some of the distance on their own.
posted
They fucking are useless! I just got stitched for £12 for a leaving present for someone in a different department, who I don’t give a toss about! When asked if I wanted to sign the card I thought it would look bad if I admitted I wasn’t remotely bothered… subsequent to that an envelop appears and I grudgingly dig out a couple of quid before being informed it is £12 each. FFFFFFS!
On a chicken related note I have become partial to the spicy wings from Dixy Chicken…the shame…but only £1.50 for five! Mmmm…When I buy them, I jump out of the shop really fast and pretend to be looking in the bookshop window next door.
Posts: 2793
| IP: Logged
quote:Originally posted by Abby: I grudgingly dig out a couple of quid before being informed it is £12 each. FFFFFFS!
That's madness! Since when did a leaving present have a standard tariff? That's not how a whip round works! They've broken the basic rules of the whip round!
Also £12 is way too high a sum. I'd be annoyed if someone said "oh you have to put in a fiver", but £12 is like... this week I can't treat myself and Octavia to our Sunday takeaway.