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Chuck Norris can't have pets. He had a dog once, but when it refused to do anything but lie on its back and quiver, Chuck had no choice but to eat it alive.
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Shortly after Bruce Lee's death, Chuck Norris worked as a Chemist, during which time he discovered the element of surprise and later, painium. He won a nobel prize for his work which he put next to his imaginary Oscar on his trophy shelf
eta: I'm wondering if I have misunderstood the entire concept of this thread...oh well I'm sure some clever cnut will point it out to me if I havent...
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One night Chuck Norris while was eating a taco that he got when Taco Bell paid their daily respects to him, a man named "Thomas the Hobo" ran up and stole Chuck's taco. Chuck Norris was so angry he screamed into the sky for 8 days and 8 nights. This period of time is now celebrated as "Chanukah" by Jewish people.
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In the eyes of many, the A-Team was never a very realistic show because all who know T know that he never has any fewer than 6 women sitting on his face.
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Chuck Norris once flew through space, on that trip he got so pissed off that roundhouse kicked 3 stars. Every time Chuck Norris does this we call it a Supernova.
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Mr. T got fired from his 1-800-COLLECT job because directors could not get him to stop saying, “1-800-COLLECT saves on all yo honkies' jibba jabba.”
When Chuck Norris chews bubblegum, the bubblegum screams.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.
[ 14.12.2005, 07:23: Message edited by: Benny the Ball ]
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When Jesus said, “Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone,” Vin Diesel threw a stone... at Jesus.
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There is a little bit of Chuck Norris in each and every one of us. Mainly due to rape.
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Upon conclusion and extensive analysis of a fifteen year study, scientists and mathmaticians agree Chuck Norris' scrotum is a geometrically perfect sphere.
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quote:Originally posted by Jack Vincennes: FYI Misc, scrotums are always funny. The rest of your post was accurate however.
ass kisser
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Originally, God created both Adam and Steve, but God's young apprentice, Chuck Norris, did not approve of Steve's incredibly gay behavior, so he roundhouse kicked Steve until the "S", "t", and penis were knocked out of him.
![[Cool]](cool.gif)
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