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» TMO Talk » The Dead » Bad Taste Ben (Page 1)

 
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Author Topic: Bad Taste Ben
Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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He seems to be away at the moment, so this is as good a moment as any for this moment of reflection and analysis of forum heavyweight dynamics. And to engage in some good old fashioned TMO h8. 'Tis only right, given that many of us have known each other in this capacity for almost three years now.

As my friend and co-denier David Irving once said, I say, quite tastelessly in fact, that more women died on the back seat of Edward Kennedy's car at Chappaquiddick than ever died in a gas chamber in Auschwitz.

Tasteless? Maybe. Am I tasteless? Possibly. Yes, so I make the occasional (lol) jibe about pikeyes being inbred thieves and blacke people being "gold-toothed jigaboos" (not my words, but words used by 69CE Elvis to describe my alleged mindset). I have insulted some people by my attitude to some of the tales from the dark side of WW2 history. I have pissed people off by my complete and utter bloody-mindedness. I have offended the more sensitive types by suggesting that Gail might have rats lurking in her mimsy. And for suggesting - Lord Almighty strike me down - that she is rather "portly".

But tell me, people - do I have a monopoly on tastelessness? Or do some people choose to see my sometimes crass remarks as just that and those made by others as some form of wacky humour?

Now here is wisdom, for I shall cut to the chase. There are a number of people who have posted tasteless things on here. But the purpose of this thread is to highlight the tastelessless of a person who has done much to promote himself as something of the opposite, as some sort of "voice of the greater TMO taste". I am of course talking about Ben, TMO's high priestess, who ventured last week into the hitherto unknown area of using biblical quotations as putdowns. As if this was one of the final stages in his long and winding route to ordainment.

In my runnings with Ben, I have noticed his two clear personalities - the high-and-mighty preacher-speak on the one hand:

quote:
Are you the huffing and puffing of the wind, Cody? Or the growl of the earthquake? Or the hollow crackle and roar of the fire?

And the basest of insults on the other, usually when he finds himself short of something better to say and/or when he finds himself forced into a corner:

quote:
you fucking spastic.

He pontificates about my alleged nastiness, yet then rolls out wonderful ditties like the following:

quote:
Rick J, Rick J
"Deformo the Rat Boy"
Core of envy and thwarted vanity
Compelled by his own deformity
To see baseness everywhere.

Ben is a man who has revelled in spoofing this board with fake tales of e-mails, MSN messaging and subterfuge, yet at the same time he has used similar language and tone when dishing out insults. One only has to wonder what his mindset is when he sits down at his PC and logs in here. I am only asking this question following my reading this:

Penned by Ben:

quote:
Oh, and it would probably be quite good fun to track down Rick J, beat the little fucker to the ground, tie him up then introduce his gurning, dariussy face to the business end of a claw hammer - once there's, say, a dozen or so terrifying, unhealable wounds in his quivering boatrace, rub a handful of hungry maggots into the raw wet redness... then set his legs on fire... then fuck his feet up - Audition-style - then calmly slide half a hundred steel knitting needles into his neck, making a human Ker-Plunk out of his throat.

Then: heft the writhing, screaming little pustule onto a gurney (tool of healers! Bitter irony...) and wheel him down to the local chip shop - luckily vacated by the cro-magnon proprietors, who wish to while away their last hours dribbling and wanking to the MDMA sandman's meat-beat - there to crank up the fryers for a bit of last-act poignance as a mobile held to the destroyed, flapping word-hole of Samuelnorton tempts an unwary Nightowl to this stainless steel and lino inferno, where, propped up for a better view, the veritable webmaster of RickDJoshua.com will be obliged to witness the unspeakable Spooks-homage of his g/f's murder.

As this pitiful heap of shredded, right-wing flesh heaves and blubbers at its recent tragic loss I - the hellish author of its woes - will add definitive insult to limitless injury by plucking one of the flesh gorged (though still ravenous) maggots from his ravaged cheeks and coaxing it into his trembling ear-hole, with whispered instructions to eat its way to victory...

What then? While the fiend is racked by paroxysms of unimaginable agony, probably best to drive him down to the local BNP party headquarters and dump him on the pavement there - leaving the form and contents of the last rites up to the surprisingly fertile (in some contexts, at least) imaginations of the bullet-headed, drag-knuckled heroes of the white race.


It is clear that a lot of thought went into this. It is written in the same harsh language as his spoof e-mails of yesteryear. But is it yet another example of Ben's "witticism"? Yes, some may say, with a shrug and a he can't possibly mean that. The low point of course was his involving Nightowl, who has fuck all to do with any dispute we may have on here. And "Dariussy"? Come the fuck on.

I personally think there is more to it, but I am not going to attempt to analyse the text. There is a venom there though, something that was noticeably absent when a few years ago he sent me a private email out of the blue requesting that I remove his head from some spoof Hollywood phoos I had done. Needless to say I relented, roped in by his fawning, faux humility.

What's clear is that it this example of what one might call "creative" writing is undoubtedly tasteless; indeed, it is as tasteless as my suggesting - albeit in full-on troll mode - that all black people are predisposed to commit violent crime.

Ah, but it doesn't end here. Matching my outbursts about pikeys or "Bushey Heath Hebrews", we have Ben posting an image of the murdered Soham girls as a comedic response to an ironic publishing suggestion. No-one batted an eyelid at what was something completely tasteless and unfunny. And yet here's an individual who has often tried to define what is and what is not funny on here - we can only laugh at the things Ben laughs at, children.

And then we have something which perhaps even tops my in comparison childish remarks about Gail's genitalia being rodent-friendly:

quote:
Davystoat, eh? I'm glad I drove that fucker "to the brink of suicide".

Him and Jimbo both.


Can this be passed off as spoof? I doubt it, given the justification that followed not long after. Hardly stuff to tell your mother about, is it?

Of course, the veritable Yorkshireman is the only forumite who has displayed his cock for all to see (with any blushes spared by the SeeThru admin team). Come on, how low and tasteless can you get?

As much as I found Turtle/Caretta/Housewife/Ziggy irritating, I think her comment on our great high priestess is probably the most honest and accurate thing that has been said about him on here:

quote:
On the board you [Ben] often come across as a smug, self-satisfied bastard with a closed-minded and patronising attitude which you parade as some sort of righteous anger. You also seem to think that just because you write everything in turgid prose, it makes it all right and somehow irrefutable.

I've nothing more to add, except to ask why is Ben so popular with some people on here? For pity's sake why?

[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: Samuelnorton ]

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"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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69CE Elvis.

lol

[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: 69 Comeback Elvis ]


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New Way Of Decay

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I preffered the other post Elvis. lololol

[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: New Way Of Decay ]

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL


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sabian

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He ain't a Nazi, innit?

Everything else pales in comparison!

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Evil isn't what you've done, it's feeling bad about it afterwards... Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.


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New Way Of Decay

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[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: New Way Of Decay ]

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BUY A TICKET AND WATCH SOME METAL


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kovacs

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I think the big difference, Rick, is that people get the strong impression that Ben doesn't mean it -- that he is being provocative and trying to shock -- whereas you do -- that all your less acceptable statements are merely toned-down versions of what you truly believe.

As a consequence, Ben is sometimes subject to criticism when people feel he goes too far and crosses boundaries of taste. As a response, he will either argue that he was trying to gee-up the forum and put a spark into things -- with a feeling of responsiblity and investment that I believe is absolutely genuine on his part, however unpleasant some may find his darker trolling -- or he'll back into a mode you didn't mention, the Wounded Stag. Here we would have a reply like, and I pastiche:

quote:
I'm sorry you feel that way, Disco. Put like that, my Sunday night spent penning this fiction and scouring for images to accompany it seems less like a worthy attempt to give people something to get their teeth into on Monday, and more like the activity of a total mouthgasping shaft-stroker. Well, cheerio for the time being, forum. It seems I'm not in tune with the mood here right now, and perhaps we need some time off from each other. My friends know where I am.

Fundamentally, though, I think most people believe that Ben's tastelessness is the result of going too far with some twisted whimsy, whereas yours is just the tip of an iceberg of bigotry. No offence! And I think this thread, while unnervingly personal, is good in its close detail and in bringing back a bit of bite to the boards.

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member #28


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kovacs

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In more detail:


quote:
Originally posted by Samuelnorton:

As my friend and co-denier David Irving once said, I say, quite tastelessly in fact, that more women died on the back seat of Edward Kennedy's car at Chappaquiddick than ever died in a gas chamber in Auschwitz.


A joke that pours far more explicit contempt on death and suffering than did Ben's enigmatic and not especially pointed use of a Soham-girls photograph as reply to a line about a Man U shirt. He was presumably saying "look at the resonances that shirt has now acquired". You are really saying "Anyone who says millions of Jews died in the Holocaust is a liar."

quote:
Yes, so I make the occasional (lol) jibe about pikeyes being inbred thieves and blacke people being "gold-toothed jigaboos" (not my words, but words used by 69CE Elvis to describe my alleged mindset).

Yes, and I think you do believe something like that. I genuinely think you are quite prejudiced against black people. That's not remotely comparable to Ben putting on a "preacher voice" to banter with Cody Joe Bibby, something I think you've misinterpreted. He was messing around with style. He doesn't believe he is a preacher. You, by contrast, do believe young black men are mainly thieves and perpetuators of degraded culture, and your jokes on the subject are, arguably, cowardly ways of saying it yet being able to back out under cover of "trolling" or "self-parody".

quote:
I have offended the more sensitive types by suggesting that Gail might have rats lurking in her mimsy. And for suggesting - Lord Almighty strike me down - that she is rather "portly".

You don't have to be sensitive to find these remarks disgustingly gratuitous. I think you're lucky Gail is clearly able to deal with your insults maturely, because these personal jibes make you seem like a very nasty, small person. I don't see the need for them at all. Yes, you had some history of animosity there. Who haven't you had some history of animosity with? Gail, however, has not made any personal or other unpleasant remarks about you in the past year to my knowledge. I think you are well overdue in letting this drop.

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member #28


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Vogon Poetess

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A "who is better:Rick or Ben?" thread while one of them is on holiday.

You're about 8 weeks too late for the "Worst TMO Day" thread, Snoreton.

I can't really be bothered to respond, other than to recall the day in December when ben said he probably wouldn't be able to post again.

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What I object to is the colour of some of these wheelie bins and where they are left, in some areas outside all week in the front garden.


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Black Mask

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Blimey! Rick really wants to fuck ben, doesn't he?

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sweet

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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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I think it was best summed up a while ago on seethe rue. No. I never tire of that joke. Ben and Rick are two sides of the same coin.

Rick, as we know from photos, is a very small coloured boy. Alien Nation was, I suspect, more than a brilliant late night cop show to him. At school he was left out of games because of his glasses and so he fell, as many do, into hero worship. Someone strong, with 20/20 vision and white skin – virile and straight in a confined, manly atmosphere that allows for the accidental touch and brotherly felch. Like Michael Jackson before him, Rick chose a German tank commander.

Ben, as we know from photos, is an awkward, portly man – uneasy amongst more cultured southerners and always battling the bulge. At school he was left out of games because of his inability to play fair. A big farmer’s boy with the associated smells and lunches of rind and cooking apples, Ben would push himself into social situations without any understanding of subtle dynamic. ‘I’m happy! Why aren’t you?’ Certainly he would have raised rabbits and grown alfalfa.

Hideously unable to understand ‘people’, Rick would design his school’s website. Because we all had respect for the bumlicky geek.

Hideously unable to understand ‘people’, Ben would, in his own words, become a ‘bird-flippin farmboy’. Yum. A pigshit stinking fat ****.

But we cannot fight our true nature, and both have chosen to spend the majority of their lives alone. Rick, of course, has his white power web design company, while Ben works for imperialist celebrator the National Library.

For Rick, everything is a fight against logic – he writes from the heart. Held back for too long by fact (you are too small, you have four eyes, you smell slightly of methane), he runs fast and loose. Who cares about fact when there is emotion? When what his gut tells him feels so right?

For Ben, everything is a fight for logic – he writes from the head. Held back for too long by emotional response (you are too close, ewww, there’s something fucking wrong with farmboy, dude, he cares the shit outta me), he runs dry. How can you argue with me? Everything I say can be cross referenced with other people who agree!

Two sides, people. One poster.


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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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"cares the shit outta me"

lol

Get away from me Mother! You're caring me.


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My Name Is Joe
That's Mister Minge to you..
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I thought it was deliberate.

Also, this thread is gaymo.


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kovacs

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Shame nobody else thinks the initial post was worth bothering with, I think. These two are among the strongest voices on the board and their emnity has been going for three years of this community in one form or another. I found it interesting to try to give Rick a proper reply, not just brush off the whole concept.

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member #28

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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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quote:
Originally posted by kovacs:
Shame nobody else thinks the initial post was worth bothering with, I think. These two are among the strongest voices on the board and their emnity has been going for three years of this community in one form or another. I found it interesting to try to give Rick a proper reply, not just brush off the whole concept.

O come on you prat. Ben clearly wrote the intial post. Must we all kowtow all the time?


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My Name Is Joe
That's Mister Minge to you..
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I think that maybe Ben should have the first reply, if he ever comes back. Besides, don't I remember you complaining about a 'hands up if you hate kovacs' thread?

Are you so sure all of the comments will be be pro-ben that he doesn't need to defend himself?


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kovacs

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That was "stick your tongue out if you hate Kovacs"...hardly the same thing to have everyone dutifully pasting in .

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member #28

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69 Comeback Elvis
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Did we all shit our brains out with the morning bran?
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kovacs

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Are you seriously saying Ben wrote the first post. I am easily confused.

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member #28

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My Name Is Joe
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Come off it, it is the same thing - a discussion (as your's quickily became) of whether or not you like someone. I wouldn't like it to happen to me, and neither did you.
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69 Comeback Elvis
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quote:
Originally posted by kovacs:
Are you seriously saying Ben wrote the first post. I am easily confused.

Yes. They've swapped passwords. We've gone from photos of prick to posting as rick.

Chekkit:

quote:
And "Dariussy"? Come the fuck on.

That's Rick speaking? Come the fuck on.

quote:
Needless to say I relented, roped in by his fawning, faux humility.

Etched in pig hide by the boar feller. Who went away for a week on Friday, then appeared 'drunk' over the weekend to write the post he quotes in full here. With no spelling mistakes.

Yeah Ben. You've really fucked off Miss Marple now.


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kovacs

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quote:
Originally posted by My Name Is Joe:
Come off it, it is the same thing - a discussion (as your's quickily became) of whether or not you like someone. I wouldn't like it to happen to me, and neither did you.


Yeah, I suppose you're right. Although I felt this was destined to be more two-sided, as it's clearly really about whether or not you like Rick more or less than Ben, and why.

I also felt that Ben would probably read the opening post with great relish, but still I take your point.

I don't know if this "Rick = Ben" theory is serious, but how exactly are you suggesting Ben got Rick's password?

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member #28


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Vogon Poetess

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Dear god, have we really become so paranoid about trolling?

[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: Vogon Poetess ]

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What I object to is the colour of some of these wheelie bins and where they are left, in some areas outside all week in the front garden.


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kovacs

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quote:
Originally posted by 69 Comeback Elvis:
Yes. They've swapped passwords.

If they've "swapped", where are the examples of Rick posting as Ben? All you're suggesting is

- Ben disappears

- Ben posts up "drunk" Norton fantasy

- Ben posts as Rick today.

Where's Rick in all this? You can't be claiming that Rick wrote Ben's "drunk" sequence.

I don't personally believe Rick would hand over his login details to Ben, but to be honest I don't know if you're having some playful double-bluff and trying to screw people along with this bodyswap theory.

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member #28


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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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Like Meatloaf. By kissmosis.

The more I think about this, the more I anger. Does this place need coralling? Are we all so weak as voices that Ben can just walk over us, push buttons and get a reply.

He clearly thinks so.


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kovacs

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quote:
Originally posted by Vogon Poetess:
fuck, doesn't rick spell it SamuelNorton with a capital N?


I'm not surprised you nixed this theory, because he's still got the same tag and postcount.

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member #28


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My Name Is Joe
That's Mister Minge to you..
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You do realise that 69CE is laughing at all this don't you?
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Black Mask

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Yeah! Death to ben!

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sweet

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kovacs

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Well, it's a good bit of Friday fun! I prefer it to people showing off about their suits and underwear.

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member #28

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69 Comeback Elvis
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I am the boy who cried wolf. *snf*

Damn you Ben. Damn you for knowing the only person who knows wouldn't be taken seriously!


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kovacs

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quote:
Originally posted by My Name Is Joe:
You do realise that 69CE is laughing at all this don't you?

I don't, no. I lack the power to pierce men's minds and discern their intentions. However, I have the satisfaction that if 69CE isn't laughing at all this, your mistake will be preserved in my quotation.

No, I don't know who is messing around. After a while it gets a bit difficult to tell. I still find it entertaining so far.

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member #28


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Vogon Poetess

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kovacs, you've immortalised my brief sleuthette excitement, which quickly faded to lameness.

Elvis is toying with us, like a kitten with a crippled robin.

I would like it if it was ben though; top comedy effect and no nasty rick aftertaste.

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What I object to is the colour of some of these wheelie bins and where they are left, in some areas outside all week in the front garden.


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69 Comeback Elvis
Skank Ho
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Ben is laughing at us. And Rick. Ugh. Rick is laughing at you. Rick isn't laughing at me because Rick knows I know. Rick is respectin my ass.

But boy does he find your asses funny.

Wake up people! SOYLENT GREEN!


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mart
Wearing nothing but a smile
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Ricko's watching the cricko, you reotards.
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Gail
Gives baby boys intravenous nicotine
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I vote that Martin should be banned from using the letter 'o' for 24 hours.
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London

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Why didn't he say, 'Ricko's watching the cricko, you thickos?'

[ 05 September 2003: Message edited by: London ]


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