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» TMO Talk » The Dead » Why do the posters on handbag.com hate me so much? (Page 3)

 
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Author Topic: Why do the posters on handbag.com hate me so much?
not...
You reached over with your hand and knocked my Jap over
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*sHuDderz
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Sidney
Her Glorious Reneging Brumness
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quote:
Originally posted by Londie:
Wow, look at Bandy's unfeasibly hairy arm.

He be a scent and hormone driven primate! Like Richard Keys (sp?) from GMTV who liked to drape his hirsute limbs around the dirrrty loveliness that is Lorraine Kelly (apparently).

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They give you a pen as fat as a modest cock and you're expected to dab it on the page, as though you were mopping the dregs of an afternoon Tommy.


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d666
I'd like to conform with the masses
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that hairy monkey used to touch lorraines love bumps?

me no likey lorraine now. she had hairy man. she never go for postpubescentteenager.

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i was there. i was there.
i've never been wrong.


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vikram

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quote:
Originally posted by ben:
Fifichan: the Rick J of Harlequin Denial.
Harlequin is real because I've met him - and there's photographic proof!


Do you remember when Tony Kaye bought a homeless man and exhibited him as art?


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Harlequin
Sponsored by Rohypnol®
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quote:
Originally posted by Vogon Poetess:
Harlequin, your habit of lurking in a corner and glowering at women may be construed by some as amusing at best, intimidating at worst.

I only lurke until I can think up of something to say to people! At the handbag meet at Tiger Tiger I made several attempt to talk to the women there but they simply wouldn't speak to me at all!

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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Phill
Listen, can you smell something ?
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quote:
Originally posted by Harlequin:
I only lurke until I can think up of something to say to people! At the handbag meet at Tiger Tiger I made several attempt to talk to the women there but they simply wouldn't speak to me at all!

well heres an idea..... write down a few conversational pointers (The weather, your job, what the local libary is like these days) on a card. that way if you get stuck you can quickly check the card for somthing to say.


Oh and dont forget to add "your hot" on there. Dont wanna miss that one out when talking to the ladies


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Castaspella
Newbie
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I post in Handbag too, and have seen some of the things posted about Harlequin, and its obvious that they don't like him because of his views on rape.
You can't turn up to a handbag meet, knowing that the girls know your views, and also that the only reason you go to them is to try and pull, then wonder why no one likes you! It's just too obvious.

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vikram

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okay fuck it. i isse what harley said about rape. i briefly asked aboyut it before but we decided not to go down that road because it was for teh best.

now i want to know what he said.

see, right now i am rather fond of him.

perhaps i should not be?


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Castaspella
Newbie
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Vikram, see here
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Harlequin
Sponsored by Rohypnol®
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quote:
Originally posted by Phill:
[QB]well heres an idea..... write down a few conversational pointers (The weather, your job, what the local libary is like these days) on a card. that way if you get stuck you can quickly check the card for somthing to say.[qb]
Its not that easy as you have to say something which is relevent to the current situation, any old topic wont do!

[ 31 May 2003: Message edited by: Harlequin ]


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frenz exp
Newbie
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vikram here
http://forums.handbag.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=12241&perpage=10&highlight=steelgate&pagenumber=1

will learn to do proper links at some point down the line!

--------------------
bela lugosi's dead, talk in Italian....


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Phill
Listen, can you smell something ?
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quote:
Originally posted by Harlequin:
[QBIts not that easy as you have to say something which is relevent to the current situation, any old topic wont do![/QB]


Yeah of course it will. after all... you always have you good looks and charm to fall back on.


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Black Mask

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I've always found showing strange women your cock is a failsafe icebreaker. 'Specially if you've given it a bit of a rub first...

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sweet

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Harlequin
Sponsored by Rohypnol®
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quote:
Originally posted by Black Mask:
I've always found showing strange women your cock is a failsafe icebreaker. 'Specially if you've given it a bit of a rub first...
I am also very shy though! I was at a love@lycos meet the other week and was too shy to tell anyone there that I was there for the meet. I just hung around the edges asking women if the gathering they were at in a cordoned off part of the pub was an office party or something. When one of them mentioned a website I pretended to know nothing about computer and asked if it was computer users club or something. That way I thought I would get to talk to the women without having to admit I was actually there for a singles gathering as I was just far too embarresed and shy to do so. It didn't work though as I ended up getting told to leave the cordoned area by someone who said it was a private event!

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Black Mask

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You're just not playing to your strengths, H. Take it from me, nothing gets a woman going faster that the unmistakable smell of giro. Try it. And then thank me.

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sweet

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Phill
Listen, can you smell something ?
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quote:
Originally posted by Black Mask:
You're just not playing to your strengths, H. Take it from me, nothing gets a woman going faster that the unmistakable smell of giro. Try it. And then thank me.


Maybe if he gives the ladies your address they can thank you aswell


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Spiderwoman2002
TMO Member
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quote:
Originally posted by Harlequin:
[QUOTE]I am also very shy though!


A good way to meet people is through your friends.


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Thorn Davis

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Not really, my friends hardly know anyone that i don't already know. And the ones I don't know, they're too ashamed of me to introduce me.

A good way to meet people is through the internet.


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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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quote:
Originally posted by Spiderwoman2002:

A good way to meet people is through your friends.

But poor likkle Harlee doesn't have any fwends, so this suggestion is useless...

--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Stefanos
Biggus Dickus
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quote:
Originally posted by Spiderwoman2002:

A good way to meet people is through your friends.

A good way to make friends is to get a hobby and not to go out of your way to look for women. Worked for me - I met Mrs Stefanos though my obsession with the R***n thang (and I got into that through an interest in history and stunt fighting) because she was interested in it as well....

[ 02 June 2003: Message edited by: Stefanos ]

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Essex boy in exile.


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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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quote:
Originally posted by Stefanos:
A good way to make friends is to get a hobby and not to go out of your way to look for women.

Knowing what Harlee's hobbies are - namely, trailing at demos with wandering eyes and skulking in the dark corners of public libraries, I very much doubt that this is a decent course of action.

I've found that talking about wine and cheese combinations while doing nighttime shopping also works, but I don't suppose Harlee knows much about this.

--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Thorn Davis

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quote:
Originally posted by Samuelnorton:
I've found that talking about wine and cheese combinations while doing nighttime shopping also works

This sounds like a horrendous scene in a chic sitcom/ full length rom-com as scripted by someone who always worked out witty and sophisticated rapports with women but never actually got to pur them into practice. I could just imagine the kooky humour and astonishingly inept attempts at looking metropolitan and cultured right now. *shudder*


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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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quote:
Originally posted by Thorn Davis:
This sounds like a horrendous scene in a chic sitcom/ full length rom-com as scripted by someone who always worked out witty and sophisticated rapports with women but never actually got to pur them into practice.

I would have thought the same before it happened, ackcherlee. I was at the time looking for cheese, not a woman. She just happened to ask what wine went with the cheese she happened to be buying, which I suggested was a bit bizarre as it was 3am and she couldn't buy alcohol anyway.

In short, I was looking for Emmenthal and found Emily.

She was highly-strung and peeled labels off shampoo bottles with a maniacal precision, though. Which was not good.

--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Spiderwoman2002
TMO Member
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quote:
Originally posted by Samuelnorton:
But poor likkle Harlee doesn't have any fwends, so this suggestion is useless...


Begs the question why. Not one friend?


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mart
Wearing nothing but a smile
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RickURHughGrant&ICM€5, you fop you.
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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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quote:
Originally posted by Spiderwoman2002:
Begs the question why. Not one friend?

Private Steely: ...I've been stuck here on this forum for three flipping years! I haven't moved! All my friends are dead: My pet spider, Sammy; Katie the worm; Bertie the bird - everyone except Neville the fat hamster.

Captain Blackadder: I'm afraid Neville bought it too, Steely. I'm sorry.

Steely: Neville, gone, sir?

Blackadder: Actually, not quite gone - he's in the corner, bunging up the sink.

--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Samuelnorton
"that nazi guy"
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quote:
Originally posted by mart:
RickURHughGrant&ICM€5, you fop you.

Hmm. If I were someone else I'd see a good script there. Nazi sympathiser, anti-Semite and anti-Blacke activist meets neurotic recruitment manager with a large collection of 1980s CDs and shampoo bottles with no labels.

At a supermarket cheese counter at 3am, no less.

[ 02 June 2003: Message edited by: Samuelnorton ]

--------------------
"You ate the baby Jesus and his mother Mary!"
"I thought they were animal cookies..."


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Thorn Davis

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quote:
Originally posted by Spiderwoman2002:

Begs the question why. Not one friend?

Is that the sound of the 2x4 being readied and a lynch mob forming? Sometimes, when handbaggers come here and start tentatively throwing jibes at Steelgate I feel like Dustin Hoffman at the end of Straw Dogs.

edit: In this scenario I like to think of Ben as the Susan George character.

[ 02 June 2003: Message edited by: Thorn Davis ]


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Spiderwoman2002
TMO Member
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No Thorn.

BTW I saw Susan George swimming once, she wore a turquoise terry towelling bikini.


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Thorn Davis

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quote:
Originally posted by Spiderwoman2002:
No Thorn.

BTW I saw Susan George swimming once, she wore a turquoise terry towelling bikini.


Oddly enough I've seen ben out swimming in exactly the same get-up.

[ 02 June 2003: Message edited by: Thorn Davis ]


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Spiderwoman2002
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Nice.

Watch yourself when diving in a non-retentive outfit like that.


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Ringo

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Frankly if anyone asked me about wines at the cheese counter at 3am, I would immediately have them down as a complete raving mentallist and do my best to politely get the fuck out of there as quickly as possible without upsetting the fragile balance in their head...

Ditto for libraries..


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Ringo

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I would also question what the fuck I was doing at a cheese counter at 3am. Exactly what sort of madness necesitates the purchase of cheese that immediately? And not just any cheese, no, we're not talking Sainsburys extra mature cheddar here, that's sold from the chiller, this would have to be some sort of fancy gay cheese...
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mart
Wearing nothing but a smile
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Taxi to Tesco's...
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