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And now it's summer, some of us are casting off our undertrousments and throwing caution to the wind. Daring to Bare. But whats this ? No ladies ? When I lived in Spain the newdie beaches were about 60-40 split between the gents and the ladies, with, at a guess, about 50% of the ladies being bare-bapped only. So blow me down when I scraped off me trews this weekend in Ireland to find only two ladies bare-bapped and another two bare-assed .... and about 100 guys full on tackle out. All the other ladies there were entirely encased in swimming chunks. Whats that about then ? Are ladies intimidated by the blokes ? or don't anglo-celtic ladies do newdiness ? or did I step into a gay zone by mistake ?
Ladies - why aren't you getting em out ? Men - why are you getting em out ?
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One hundred of your Irish meats and two veg? Jesussing fuck, I'm starting to understand Rev Paisley's rabid opposition to a united Ireland.
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Well, there was one set of prime Welsh tackle, mine, and Dearly Beloved's norkage, but she's a German so it doesn't really count. Pretty scary sight I must admit. It would have been a lot better with more bappage about the place.
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Anyone who has ever watched a camera pan across the crowd at any Irish sporting event will be aware we are not the world's most attractive race. The thought of 100 neked, sunburnt and flabby blokes cavorting about fills me with the urge to defecate.
pic too big and stoopid
[ 25.05.2004, 10:52: Message edited by: My Name Is Joe ]
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You mean the reason why there are so few women to surreptitiously gawp at is because of the quality of the blokage daring to bare. Frankly I'm shocked at the shallowness. I was convinced it was something to do with school changing rooms.
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I don't know if I would ever do the full exposure beach thing. I'd consider it, but I frankly don't know if I'd have the nerve. Not that I've ever had the opportunity.
I know clothing-optional beaches exist, but I couldn't tell you where to find one. Though if there are any around here, they'd be likely very similar to the beach described by VOP earlier (i.e., loaded with blindingly white Irish flesh), which frankly takes much of the allure away from the whole nude beach idea.
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I mean, I've been sans clothes on beaches, just... er, more in private. As in, with only one other person. You know. Which is the embarrassed wanky again?
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When I was in Malaga, my hotel was one the beach, a nude beach! Bonus, so I thought...
What I thought would happen: Wake up, get kitted up, grab a couple oranges and a croissant at the complimentary Continental breakfast, run out the doors and down the steps willing all the buxom Spanish ladies to woo me with their flesh.
What did happen: Wake up, get kitted up, grab a couple oranges and a croissant at the complimentary Continental breakfast, run out the doors and down the steps and stopping in my tracks as I see some guy bending over.... With no trunks on. Busta Rhymes he wasn't. To stop looking at the real life goatse.cx image in front of me, I turn to my left and there, in all her glory, was a 90ish year old woman with her baps out. She was in a sun lounge approx 18" off the sand. Her tits were *in* the sand.
I turned around and spent the rest of the holiday in the hotel pool. Moral: Nude beach doesn't always = good times!
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Nakidity, for the reasons outlined above by MINJ, is not at all sexy. In anglo-celtic countries it does seem as if newdiness = sexiness but I think thats more to do with the social norms of those countries. Its not the case in, lets say, the German or Scandinavian countries. However, back to the stiffy issue, it can happen - my advice, turn over and get some sun on your back, it's considered rude to point.
I'm not a massive fan of the nude sunbathing, but thats because I get bored and its nothing to do with nudism. What I do like, and my reason for occasionally giving the l'il fella an airing is the swimming. Getting out to the sea with not even a pair of pants between you and the deep blue ... fanfeckintastic. Massage for the soul.
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Man, I practically grew up on a nudist beach. Well, I spent three summers as a teen spending every day on a beach down on the coast, right on the Málaga-Granada border (Cerro Gordo if you know it, VOP, about twenty minutes east of Nerja).
There was a great mix of people. On the one hand you had the hippies, generally a mix of Spanish, German and Nordics, who camped on the beach all summer, and who made you feel you were in a kind of village, a beach-side newdie hippy village.
Then there were the day-trippers, including us, who were there every day but went home in the evening.
And then you got the mirones, the voyeurs. These were old geezers, generally farmers, who'd turn up every now and then and sit on the pebbles fully clothed, looking a bit sheepish and disappointed at what they'd found.
In a couple of minutes the hippies would have noticed the mirones, and would then form a circle around them and wave their nobs in their faces, clapping out a rhythm and asking them if they liked what they saw. This happened about once a day, and it was always fun to watch, if a little sad to see these old guys get humiliated by the hippies waving their tackle right in their face. The old geezers would last about twenty seconds before getting up and leaving.
As for a stiffie, you just don't get one. It's not a sexy thing seeing saggy boobs, oddly-shaped mantackle, hairy muffs and sweaty German ladypits everywhere. And after a day or two it ceases to be an issue anyway. You just don't notice the nudeness.
I concur with VOP on the skinny dipping, it's one of the nicest physical sensations I can think of. Particularly at night, when the moon's out and the water's calm; it's a beautiful thing.
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Hey Mart, I'm spending next week on Bolonia beach near Tarifa. I have quite a stressful job so I find a few days nude swimming is equal to a month's conventional holiday in terms of destressing. So, if any of you TMOers haven't tried it yet ... you should.
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quote:Originally posted by Vanilla Online Persona: And now it's summer.
No its not summer yet not till next week, and its definitly not summer in the north and Scotland where summer comes late. There seems to be a southern bias to these boards. Summer is June, July and August only although if you live in the south you might think it includes May and September and if you live in the far north or Scotland you might think it only consists of July and August. Posts: 1396
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...and if you are in the south of the US right now (like, uhm, me) you may think summer means 1. tornados 2. flooding 3. mosquitos.
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Ooh ooh ooh. I love skinnydipping. The feeling of cool water around ones intimate areas - top drawer. Especially fine when at night and the phosphorescence comes out to play.
Maybe we should have a nuddy-meat, all treading water in the dark, with miners' lamps on.
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I dunno about this skinny dipping thing, if I was undertaking it anywhere other than in a swimming pool I think I might be a bit worried about, er, you know, predatory fishes. And that.
What do people think about more day to day public nudity? What if people were allowed to go nude anywhere?
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quote:Originally posted by Grianagh: ...and if you are in the south of the US right now (like, uhm, me) you may think summer means 1. tornados 2. flooding 3. mosquitos.
There are mosquitos in the Scotish mountains as well, though they are called midges up their. They are not disease carrying though, but are a nuisance to walkers as swarms of them keep biting people.
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quote:Originally posted by Grianagh: ...and if you are in the south of the US right now (like, uhm, me) you may think summer means 1. tornados 2. flooding 3. mosquitos.
There are mosquitos in the Scottish mountains as well, though they are called midges up there.
There's Tornados too. Bastard things fly past at about 500mph and scare the shit out of one.
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quote:Originally posted by dang65: There's Tornados too. Bastard things fly past at about 500mph and scare the shit out of one.
The are tornadoes in East Anglia in this country where the land is very flat. They are not as strong as the ones in America but are still quite frightening.
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Frank
moon-chain-silver-mother-breakfast-fry-up-sausage
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quote:Originally posted by Harlequin: The are tornadoes in East Anglia in this country where the land is very flat. They are not as strong as the ones in America but are still quite frightening.
Norwich town centre, May 2002
[ 04.06.2004, 14:49: Message edited by: Frank ]
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