you can't just rely on me the whole time.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I dreamed about Ralph last night. Ralph! FFS.
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
Were there pumpkins involved?
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
Come on over to my place, Benway. Ralphgoblin's got a surprise for you.
[ 24.10.2007, 05:10: Message edited by: jonesy999 ]
Posted by sam (Member # 884) on :
I believe I have said this before, and I will say it again. You lot are seriously weird. Disturbed, in fact.
Was ralph on his own bignuts or did he bring Brian with him?
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
I watched Shark Attack 3: Megalodon last night. A gem of a film, really. Well, not really. Shit, but funny, and probably intentionally retarded.
I stayed in Leeds Monday night, as I was there fitting some PCs. I came to get washed this morning and realised I'd left my razor and stuff in my bag. I reached in, and felt a weird intense sensation on my left middle finger. I withdrew my hand, to see my finger gashed very deeply and pissing blood, where I'd managed to slide it down the side of my razor. Not a great start to the day, all told.
Plus I then misjedged how cold it was outside, and wrapped up like I was going on an arctic expedition. Halfway through cycling to work, I started to sweat, intensely. By the time I reached work there was a huge sweat patch down my back and under each arm.
Could the day get any worse? I'll keep you posted..
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
When I was a kid I was obsessed with women's handbags. I would pull old handbags from my mum's wardrobe and go through them looking for nick knacks. If you remember from the good old days of too much responding to everything, I thought tampons were premium bonds so I would pull out things like those nuggets of white gold, haul out half-penny pieces or weird looking hair grips, fondling the rubber tip or pinging their springiness. I'd order my booty neatly on the floor then carefully put it all back and replace the bag, leaving no one any the wiser. One day I put my little hand into a red leather number and pulled it out the same colour as the scarlet hide. My mum has stowed a naked razor blade in the bottom of her bag. Like some crazy streetwalking crack ho out of Fort Apache: The Bronx or something. I had to go to hospital. When I asked her why she kept this lethally sharp, unprotected object in her bag, my mum replied "You never know when it will come in handy."
Now, when anyone asks me to fetch something from their handbag (woof), I always fetch the bag, rather than delve into the violent innards myself. I feel you pain, Ringo.
[ 24.10.2007, 05:50: Message edited by: jonesy999 ]
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
The ironic thing is that I never cut myself shaving.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Jimmy Big Nuts: I dreamed about Ralph last night. Ralph! FFS.
What was the dream about Benway?
I dreamt about Misc a few weeks ago.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
Dreaming about people from TMO is so 2003
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Woof!
ETA: What was the dream about ralph?
[ 24.10.2007, 07:02: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
I was in a Home Depot in the UK (does the UK even have Home Depots?). Anyway, I spotted you and the missus pushing your big orange cart through the store, shopping for various gardening supplies (you had a hose and a rake in your cart). I followed you both through the store for a bit, then I casually strolled by and caused our carts to collide. I got up in your face and started yelling at you about being more careful. You cowered in fear, afraid I was going to get physical. At that point I said "Misc...it's me...ralph". You smiled, we hugged. Then I woke up.
Posted by New Way Of Decay (Member # 106) on :
You've got a real complex huh ralph?
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It was just a dream mikey. Just a dream.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
I've ordered some new tyres for my bike. Apparently these ones are almost totally immune to punctures through the tread. here's hoping!
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: I was in a Home Depot in the UK (does the UK even have Home Depots?).
No, we don't have Home Depots. We have Homebases and B&Qs.
Stupid ralphdream.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Stupid ralphdream.
It was just a dream. And I didn't get in your face out of anger...I was just fooling around with you. Christ.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
I think it's beautiful...
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
I know, right?
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
I dremt that I was working at home, and I heard my wife come in, called out hello to her, and then turned round at it was my ex, who said 'it's okay, I'm here to sort everything out' - I spent the rest of the dream trying to explain to her that we weren't actually together anymore, that I was married and that I wanted her to leave.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
in my dream, I found out that ralph was a professor of sociology AND psychology, and I remember thinking...you know... I've not seen much evidence of that before, but maybe I just haven't been paying attention.
[ 24.10.2007, 09:24: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
also it transpired that everbody on my 'team' at work was also acting in CSI, and I couldn't understand why I hadn't even been told about it, let alone invited. And and! I was doing radio djing (which I used to do in RL) and everything was going wrong. Records were skipping, I couldn't find CD's, the mic was all bollocksed up, there was loads of dead air, I was letting albums run the whole way through as I tried to fix things etc. Every time I went on the mic I realised I didn't know what I was going to say and just sort of spluttered and trailed off. But I woke up thinking that I really miss doing the radio.
[ 24.10.2007, 09:15: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph: And I didn't get in your face out of anger...I was just fooling around with you.
That's a foolhardy thing to do ralph. What if I hadn't recognized you in time? You could have wound up hanging from the roof by an improvised hose-noose, with a rake sticking out of your arse, whimpering "B..but I'm ralph! y'know r..ralphie boy from the moon on..li..." :saddam:
Misc = quick like ninjer.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
But then you'd probably just have woken up with an erection.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It was a mother fucking dream.
Posted by London (Member # 29) on :
Now I'm thinking about Ralph's erection. Thanks, Misc.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by London: Now I'm thinking about Ralph's erection. Thanks, Misc.
We all are, London. But I'm not going to apologise. I'm hoping that the power of our combined imaginations focusing on his penis will cause ralph to suffer a stonking yet totally unexpected desky.
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
It's having quite the opposite effect.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Think harder everyone - we can do this!
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
ralph works at home, misc - he probably has an errection most of the time and rarely dresses, except in bear skins and deer hides. Maybe we should turn the mojo on you?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Not again! Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: ralph works at home, misc
No I don't. I wish I did, but even if they allowed that sort of thing, I don't have the bandwidth at home to do it.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
I'm working from home. It's alright. No shoes on. Played that new guitar hero demo at lunch time. listening to music. Unwashed. Alone.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
so alone.
Posted by scrawny (Member # 113) on :
I'm seeing yo' woman tonight.
Posted by scrawny (Member # 113) on :
So i guess you'll be alone then, too.
Posted by Jimmy Big Nuts (Member # 895) on :
yes. All alone.
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
last week i had a weird dream involving applicants's lead singer, book burning, transvestites and bbc's mark and lard. it was set in some sort of bauhaus complex.
i also had a sex dream about a tmo'er.
i'm so lonely Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
quote:Originally posted by vikram: i also had a sex dream about a tmo'er.
Which one? If it was me, please don't tell me.
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
turns out bigfoot is big all over
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
Bandy?
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
sorry, bigfoot was a reference to ralph and his sasquatch ways. i didn't dream of ralph. or bandy. and for once it wasn't benway.
[ 24.10.2007, 11:48: Message edited by: vikram ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
It was Stockholm, innit?
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
i'm a gayer now, you fool
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
are you? what made you decide to switch teams?
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
you did ralph, your manly beard did
not really. it don't count if you're not the one taking it right?
[ 24.10.2007, 12:14: Message edited by: vikram ]
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
no. if you're not taking it, it doesn't count.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
How am I supposed to keep up with your current sexuality? I don't read your inevitable twit® or baebo or whatever.
Besides, do former str9 gayers never dream of girl-folds? Not even in an ironic way?
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
i'm not really gay
Posted by ralph (Member # 773) on :
liar
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Oh god that's really funny! You said you were gay but in fact you're not!
You're crazy Vikram Posted by Brian Munich (Member # 2342) on :
quote:Originally posted by jonesy999: I thought tampons were premium bonds
I had a Portuguese au pair when I was younger. Yup, suck it up. Anyway, she used to leave the inner tubes from tampons in the bin. The cardboardy bits. I thought they made excellent pirate telescopes. I used to show my Mum every night. And then there would be looks, and then they would disappear. Only to appear again a few weeks later and the cycle would continue. There should be more toys that help explain the complicated female in a d'oh many years later way.
Posted by sam (Member # 884) on :
How much simpler it would have been had your parents asked her to wrap them first before discarding them.
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
quote:Originally posted by ralph:
quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: ralph works at home, misc
No I don't. I wish I did, but even if they allowed that sort of thing, I don't have the bandwidth at home to do it.
Sorry - I thought you did - maybe all the talk about building a home made me think that?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball:
quote:Originally posted by ralph:
quote:Originally posted by Benny the Ball: ralph works at home, misc
No I don't. I wish I did, but even if they allowed that sort of thing, I don't have the bandwidth at home to do it.
Sorry - I thought you did - maybe all the talk about building a home made me think that?
You're thinking of ralph's kids. They work at home, bless 'em.
Posted by Deep Freeze (Member # 841) on :
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)