[ 07.12.2011, 03:27: Message edited by: ben ]
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
England wins at cricket and motorsport. And snooker, sometimes.
It's really only football that we're totally shit at. And tennis if you don't count Andy Murray.
Plus, UFC is totally and utterly gay. I don't want to spend a single penny on watching two skinny twats with shaved heads try to tickle each other's bums. It's literally the queerest sport ever created.
[ 01.07.2010, 08:41: Message edited by: Ringo ]
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Tsamina mina zangalewa This time for Africa! Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: Plus, UFC is totally and utterly gay. I don't want to spend a single penny on watching two skinny twats with shaved heads try to tickle each other's bums. It's literally the queerest sport ever created.
Ringo is right. UFC reminds me of something ben said, about Carter USM trying to bum Philip Schofield. That's how every UFC fight ends: "What are you trying to do? Bum me?"
Maybe we should bring back cockfighting.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Cricket doesn't really count. What does anyone else in the world care if we beat Australia? Aside from which - don't we usually get our arses kicked by Australia? Forgive the vagueness of these assertions, btw - I speak from a position of almost total ignorance.
Motorsport: again, unsatisfying - drivers and teams seem somehow decoupled from a tangible national association (it's hard to root for a tax exile, surely?).
I've not actually seen any Ultimate Fighting, but from what you're saying, they should be had under Trades Descriptions. Bare-knuckle boxing it is, then - everyone can get behind a brawler in joggy bottoms I'd have thought. Also: very easy for the kiddies to get excited about (and thereby seed a new generation of fighting champions) as there's no requirement for expensive kit.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Here's a thought: how about - as a subsidiary entertainment for World Awesome Team Bare Knuckle Challenge (Live! From Ipswich) we could have tag-team bare knuckle boxing with all-black teams versus all-white teams.
Just for fun, of course! But it would be quite a good way of settling once and for all which race is 'best'.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Hasn't world politics already demonstrated which race is 'best' when the gloves are off?
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: Bare-knuckle boxing it is, then - everyone can get behind a brawler in joggy bottoms I'd have thought. Also: very easy for the kiddies to get excited about (and thereby seed a new generation of fighting champions) as there's no requirement for expensive kit.
This may not be the boost you think it is. If there's no expensive kit, then there's no opportunities for corporate sponsorship, and no incentive for big companies to pour money into your sport.
Perhaps there's a way of institutionalising football hooliganism, and turning that into a sport. There's already an established fan base, and these guys always seem to think they know the grit and determination the football teams are lacking. What better way to prove that they have the guts to play for their country, than by giving them their own sport? And then you've got tons of sponsorship packages: "Fat Alan uses Budweiser broken bottles", "Early Grave Dave endorses Raleigh Bicycle Chains" and so forth.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Hasn't world politics already demonstrated which race is 'best' when the gloves are off?
You haven't changed a bit. Always comes back to the Jews with you, doesn't it.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
Thing you're forgetting is that British people don't actually want sporting success. What Brits really enjoy, more than anything else, is cynically predicting the failure of anyone arrogant enough to bother trying hard to succeed at anything. And when someone is cheeky enough to actually win at something, all people want to do is give reasons why their victory was effectively meaningless.
"yeah well, England may have won the Ashes, but it's only because Australia fielded their weakest ever team"
"jenson button only won the F1 world championship because he had the best car. Anyone else in that car would have won more races than Jenson did"
Face it, Britain is a nation of losers, and there's nothing we hate more than winning. We love wallowing in this collective self pity, and meticulously criticising anyone who ever looks like succeeding in any sporting arena.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: We love wallowing in this collective self pity
We're the very best in the world at wallowing in collective self pity. Although that's only because everyone else is a bit rubbish at it. Give it a few years and the Chinese will wallow us into a cocked hat, you mark my words.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Forgive the self-vandalism of a thread that never went anywhere, but in a world where we can't start new topics I had no other option!!
Simple question: Who would be up for pre-Xmas drinks in London on Thursday 15th December?
Venue: TBC - say, The Chandos Pub or somewhere on Char X Road?
Dress code: in tribute to the Tory-led Coalition government, I suggest we come as greyer, jowlier, more right-wing versions of our younger selves.
1. Who would be up for this? 2. Spread the word. Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
Mayhap, but probably not, unfortunately. Thursday's aren't great - working Friday and so on. A Friday would be a much better day for this.
Sorry ben Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Yes.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
That would be nice.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Ringo: Mayhap
I'll take this as a 'probably'.
mart
Ringo
ben
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Alphabetical order, please.
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
i could probably fucking come and ruin everything.
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
or is this a decoy meat to ensure i am definitely not in the vicinity of the 'real' one.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Having another beer with mart, Ringo and Kanway is, like, in the top five of my most recently updated 1000-things-to-do-before-I-die list.
If only Herbs could be there too?
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
i'll bring some pills and we can all get royally fucked up lol
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
I'll bring the coke.
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
yeah this is going to be fucking dynamite.
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
Benway, when did I last see you? Was it this time last year at Nambucca or more recently? Let's catch up before Christmas. I am not coming to this TMO meet, obviously.
[ 07.12.2011, 15:52: Message edited by: vikram ]
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Vikram for shame.
Come on, people - last chance to hook up and raise a glass. Not as if you're going to be busy with anything else as important is it.
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Does it have to be on the Thursday?
I can't make it on the Thursday anymore. Or, by extension, on the Friday, as I will be sleeping in a cave in the Lake District.
[ 08.12.2011, 10:30: Message edited by: mart ]
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
I'm afraid I'm reliably informed that I'm brok until payday now so I'm downgrading my mayhap to a nayhap. Sorry Ben.
But I'd like to do it! Maybe in the new year or something.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
S-s-s-s-s-ssss- Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
s-s-s-s-so
c-c-c-ch-ch-c-c- Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
The Lake District is over rated. And London's too far away. Can't you do it somewhere else, bne? Swanswea, praps?
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Swanswea, praps?
Ooh, la-di-da. Swanswea is it? In these uncertain times, the rest of us are having to make do with Bargain Booze own-brand duckspiss. Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
I've been taking elocution lessons. So I fit in better during this dastardly period of Tory rule.
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
Everyone should definitely come to Oxford in the new year.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
Have you considered milton keynes at all?
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
I could quite possibly come to this (subject to usual caveat regarding partner needing to be in for childcare poiposes) but WTF? Everyone's sleeping in caves in Swansea instead?
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
And even after all these years, I still haven't worked out if/when Ben's being sarcastic. I still remember his (or was it someone else's) ultimate backhanded compliment that I was a 'much under-rated poster'. Genius.
Posted by dance margarita (Member # 848) on :
not on thursday. i cant, ive got an essay due in the next day. do it on saturday, ill be in london for my mum's 70th. or do it on the thursday and ill join you via the magic of skype on your strokeyscreen phartsmones or some such perilously modern bullshit.
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
I can't do Thursday
I can do pretty much any day next year as I'll be working in stupid London.
Well. Pretty much any day apart from Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays but you know, apart from that.
Probably best not to do weekends either.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Okay then.
Kanye
Herbs
Re. Thursday. I'm sorry it's a Thursday. It's just a day I happen to be in London.
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
Er... not sure R is going to be around for childcare purposes. *wet fart*
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
Kanye
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
See, this is why Darryn is closing the forum Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
fuck this
Posted by Samuelnorton (Member # 48) on :
I might well have lifted my self-imposed "no meat" ban but I am running a project that will inevitably run well beyond the witching hour on Thursday.
Hnngh.
[ 13.12.2011, 15:58: Message edited by: Samuelnorton ]
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
15th December is a Friday this year...
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
Soo... what - we go see the movie then go out for drinks like the normals do?
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