This is topic CLOSING TIME in forum Life at TMO Talk.


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Posted by Damon's Off (Member # 3) on :
 
Hey folks,

The TMO forum will be closed to new topics and comments from January 1st 2012. Thank you for playing.

Love and kisses,
Damon's Off
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
Sad times. End of an era. [Frown]
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
The fact that I posted that 5 minutes after the topic was created suggests I refresh here a lot more than I actually do....
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
Hi everyone!
 
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
 
Hi mart!

CiH, can you get to 5,00 posts before January?

Thanks for TMO, everyone. I did like it a lot.
 
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
 
RIP.

The passing of something that can't happen again.

I raise a glass to Dazzler for keeping her alive all this time.

Cheers SeeMO. You were great.
 
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
 
Feel a bit sad about this, but it's the right thing to do. Thanks DO and Darryn for keeping it alive way past it's best before date, and thanks to everyone else who posted here over the years from the date of the Seethru "Bullies Reunited" meme, for keeping me entertained when I should be working, inspiring me to write stuff when I should be working, make stupid photoshop pics when I should be working. LOL when I should be working. It's perhaps down to TMO that I am now self-employed, and my former employer is now unemployed. [Cool]

Some special moments to me were:
1. Organised infiltration of other message boards.
2. Hedgehog guestbook trolling
3. Urban dead, Queer Jew and the organised attack which kind of petered out.
4. Alphabet thread, obvs
5. "Do it for Bun" a thread started by me which got hijacked by bread related puns
6. A haiku thread from Ben, which I got my first positive response from Ben
7. The pre meet radio show hosted by fish and Jonesy
8. Getting my second avatar bestowed upon me [Cool]
9. Mart's Welcome Larry pic
10. Loads of other stuff.

I guess we're all on twitter now anyhow right? and we'll always have wayback machine.

Tildé out.
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
I hate the thought that TMO is past its sell-by date. It educated me in arguing and writing funny things (still working on that one), found me a husband and by extension my life now, made me laugh till I cried more times than I can remember and gave me one of the proudest moments of my life when someone called me Board Queen (briefly).

Bye bye teemo. I am doing a cry.
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
Though I am still miffed that I never got my 3000-post avatar, so meh.
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Damon's Off:
Hey folks,

The TMO forum will be closed to new topics and comments from January 1st 2012. Thank you for playing.

Love and kisses,
Damon's Off

Is this anything to do with those Mayan cunts?
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
Oh can we say **** now?
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
Lol. No.
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
[Mad]
 
Posted by Samuelnorton (Member # 48) on :
 
Well, ten years or so is pretty good going. It just had to die sooner or later I suppose.

Like a few others on here, this place did change my life - and for that I will always remember it.

Bye, TMO. [Frown]
 
Posted by kovax (Member # 1157) on :
 
++ CAN YOU BE THE LAST EVER PERSON TO POST ON TMO ++

It'll be like ebay sniping but funner. #tmo
 
Posted by Damon's Off (Member # 3) on :
 
Oh, right, so NOW they all come out of the woodwork. Bastards.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
alright?
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
Wearing : Brown Cords, greenish t-shirt, stripey jumper.

Eating: Had a 68p salad for lunch. Might have a snickers later

Listening: Machine Head when I'm allowed

Watching: Masterchef the professionals

Doing: Got a new job this week so will be up in London with all the SeeMo Nu Meedja Elite as of January
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
Wearing : black strides, white shirt, charcoal muji jumper. Cufflinks by thomas pink, brass collar stays by T. Lewin.

Eating: nothing yet. Will get bleak sandwich in about 15 mins

Listening: ambient drone / modern classical

Watching: Godard (tonight)

Doing: working for the man.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
sad news: Mikee Teevee killed himself about two months ago. He didn't leave a note.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
he was also the first known case of achieving the sweet release of death by simply holding his breath. He was so determined to escape the senseless charade of human existence that he clung onto his goal even after falling unconscious. He is a hero to us all. He is survived by his 6 month old daughter, Megatron.
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
I think we all knew that Mikee was going to kill himself sooner or later. It was just a bit disappointing that he didn't do it live on webcam.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
still, at least both he and all who knew him are now at peace.

[ 30.11.2011, 09:15: Message edited by: Kanye West ]
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
Is this fact going to delay the recording of the next Controller Throw podcast?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
what is this controller throw?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
I think it would be nice if there was some kind of continuation of this place. It's a bit of a relic. Be worth a lot in a few years, to a collector. couldn't you just make the entire website available as a download?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
actually why is it being shut down? Has DO been working 8 hours a day to maintain the place for the last two years?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
loads of meetings trying to work out how to keep the tmo brand relevant and fresh in the era of social networking? A whole team of people watching the hit counters, praying for the return of forum heavyweights such as dr benway and StevieX to make a return and re-ignite the passion? Rounds of VC funding on the promise that one day ben will call rick a nazi again, causing the ad revenue for dr. horrible's sing-along blog to explode? Doogie Howser himself calling DO and asking to see the fucking money from his almost decade long endorsment deal?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
people hurling 'Ask Jeeves' branded plush toys across boardrooms as consultants line up to deliver the eulogy? line charts for the last ten years dropping lower than an octopus at a limbo party? Depression, bitterness. Open hostility in Starbucks. drunken DM tweets, accusations flying. Yet always, hope. Always a chance. The dream, not dead. Not until now.

[ 30.11.2011, 12:43: Message edited by: Kanye West ]
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
but it's not dead! What about the come back show!? the team get together for one last job. Only they can save the day. Brought out of retirement, we see how the lives have diverged. They're old and tired. Some of them are dead. There's baggage, there's children. Failed romances. They gather and swap stories. They know that there is no going back, this is their swan song. Most of them won't survive. But dammit, they're the best we've got. The old posting memories come back.

quote:

the knowledge returns

The old partnerships reform, magic that has been shut away in boxes suddenly explodes. The years peel back and we're young again. It's better than ever. One last hoorah. There's no selfishness. There are no secrets. There are admissions, there are life long bonds. There are tears of joy and sadness. Trust. Thanks. And one by one, they blaze harder than they ever did, until the fires go out, the day has been saved, and the legend has been written.

[ 30.11.2011, 10:05: Message edited by: Kanye West ]
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
great times. Great, great times. Magic. Great.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
Good times? No mate. Great.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
that's true about mikee killing himself by the way, but it wasn't by holding his breath. He actually hung himself alongside Mark Speight, but it was under-reported in the mainstream press due to the implications about their relationship. However, their friendship was strictly platonic. I know this because I used to visit them at their workshop/makespace in Gillingham, where they were setting up a business making organic wooden kids toys. Mark had the contacts, Mikee brought his creative flair, and together they made some delightful toys. By the time of the fire, he was producing quite complex wooden automata.

After the fire though, their relationship became difficult. Mark Speight became withdrawn and miserable, and his fiance found comfort in Mikee's arms. They tried again with the business, this time looking to China for cheap labour, and even going so far as to spend a few weeks out there, hoping to set up China's first sustainable wood operation. On their return, Mark Speight discovered the affair between Mikee and his girlfriend. Angry and upset, he confronted Mikee, and Mikee revealed that he was aware of Mark Speight's suspicious financial gain from the earlier fire. They realised that they had brought the misery onto themselves - they couldn't blame anybody else. Mark Speight's fiance was left out in the cold, and ended up killing herself at their London flat, and the China deal fell through.

Out of money and ideas, the pair became detached. They used to spend hours and hours holed up in a bedsit in Hastings, watching Mikee's old Terrahawks VHS compilations, dreaming up increasingly bizarre and outlandish toy ideas. When Bandai finally unveiled their PlanetBlasters web-enabled action figures, they knew the jig was up. They caught a train to London, where they planned to hang themselves in the toilets in Hamleys. But they never made it. Frustrated by an agonisingly slow journey due to weekend engineering, the luckless duo met their ends behind the snack stop at paddington station.

[ 30.11.2011, 12:35: Message edited by: Kanye West ]
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
I killed tmo didn't I. It was all my fault. The memories are coming back.
 
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
 
What did I say to you? Keep it light, I said. Take it slowly, eeeease yourself back into it gently. But no, BANG.... straight in with the death of a forumite followed up with a feverish stream of conciousness type posting, culminating in a self-fulfilling confession. No pause for breath, no space to let anyone else chip in, a sandwich comment, a pun, a fucking pun would have done it.

Even kovax managed to stay on brief. Cherry In Hove mentioned Masterchef The Professionals FFS. You could have riffed on that, maybe something about foccacia or whatever. There was no need for this m7, no need...
 
Posted by Damon's Off (Member # 3) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Kanye West:
Doogie Howser himself calling DO and asking to see the fucking money from his almost decade long endorsment deal?

If only, NPH demanding his fucking money down the phone would totally make my day. If you must know, we've not really paid any attention to any aspect of the site for years, apart from the odd clearout of forum posts. The forum does some weird caching shit and we've both sort of forgotten how the software works, so every once in a while it generates a fuckton of data and we have to delete stuff to stay within the limits of our hosting package, which is still costing us 20 bucks a month. Neither of us have enough time to moderate the place and because of that we can't allow new registrations, which are 99% spam. All the old members have moved on and no new members are allowed in, so this is basically yer lot. One guy talking to himself.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
i didn't watch that godard film, but instead, had a skype meeting then half-heartedly carried out a few thieves guild quests in skyrim.
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
I haven't got Skyrim. I would really like it though.
 
Posted by Cherry In Hove (Member # 49) on :
 
I need to stop reading about it as everything just makes me want it more but I'm still on COCKING FF XIII.

And I've decided that the big field bit ISN'T much more interesting. It's just "go to a place, get a mission, walk 10 minutes across the map, kill a beast, repeat".
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
Typical fucking TMO. Barely two pages in and we're talking about cocking video games.

[Mad]
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
What shall we talk about instead Mart?

Round our way there are several people applying to erect wind turbines, and there are loads of other people 'up-in-arms' (i.e. a little bit miffed) about it. The main complaint is that it will blight the very pretty landscape (Staffordshire Moorlands - very pretty), so I was thinking this morning, why doesn't someone invent a special hydraulic mast for wind generators so they could discretely sink into special pits in the ground during the day and only rise up at night so they wouldn't spoil the view. And it's more windy then anyway, as far as I can tell.

The special pits would have special lids - made out of solar panels, which would work during the day. I'm not sure if the NIMBYs are against solar panels as well though. Maybe the panels could be recessed into the ground a little, but still be pointing at the Sun, obv.

 -

I looked this up on Google Images and the closest thing seems to be a wind generator on a collapsible tripod. But the review said it falls over in strong winds, which seems like a bit of a design flaw.
 
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
 
How long before Dang goes 'proper' mental?
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
Ah, it's not going to happen. Not as long as I have TMO to keep me grounded.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
Hate to say this, but Tilde check your DMs.
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
Cherry, I've been lent Skyrim by a mutual acquaintance and if last night hadn't been too cold to game and tonight I hadn't been babysitting someone else's sprog I would be all over it like a fat kid on a smartie. You can look at it this weekend if you like.

I love Doctor Benway. If I wasn't married...
 
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
 
Please read:
A personal appeal from Wikipaedia Founder Jimmy Wales

 -

Friends. When I began in earnest to craft the definitive wiki on 'The Internet' I confess I shed a tear at the transformation, in just a few short years, of the ultimate maedium for meeting like- and unlike-minded humans, for talking and joshing and riffing and flirting with them, for drinking and fighting and creating, and taking them into your heart and being taken into theirs in turn - almost heart-stopping in its immediacy and playfulness, but also its (sometimes) evil and downright viciousness - and for magnifying your experience of the digitally-enabled (enbalmed?) working day... its transformation from all this, the internet, into a sack of corporate horse come.

Hear me out. I've sat, beard in cupped palm, through many a thousand million presentation on 'soatse-l-media' and not one of them has given me an iota of an inkling that any of your tweets and facecocks has meant anything in the slightest by comparison with this here little mansion, in which we ran amok - like it was some avant-garde, teacherless educational institution from the end of the sixties - and 'to which we are all indebted and from which none of us can escape'.

There's a great Lorrie Moore story, 'Agnes of Iowa' in which the bored heroine tries to explain to her husband why, years after she moved to the sticks, she she still misses New York: Everyone tried hard to be funny. It was like brains having sex. It was like every brain was a sex maniac.

When I read this I thought of TMO and Seethru and felt stunned and guilty that nearly five years had gone by since I unglued myself from it (a lethal combo of performance anxiety, 'work' and 'daddy' duties). First I posted sporadically, then hardly at all, then I just lurked occasionally. Aware of a dwindling, a falling-away - and made sad and guilty by it, like all the other things making me sad and guilty that, you know, accompany 'work' and 'daddy'. lol.

 -
Fig i. 'Daddy', 'duty' - a modern icon reflects.

About six months ago I had one of my periodic TMO archive binges - I'm sure I'm not alone in this vice - where I spent hour after hour luxuriating in thousands of characters of - I don't know, parcelling it up into laughter, revenge, honesty, spite and ingenuity seems always so glib - let's just say intensity.

It was always intense - and when it stopped being intense it stopped being TMO. Or possibly, when I stopped being intense I stopped being ben.

Pushed back from my desk. Lowered the lid of my laptop. Walked out of the room and away, finally, from some of the happiest moments of my life.
 
Posted by Damon's Off (Member # 3) on :
 
[Frown]
 
Posted by Tilde (Member # 1215) on :
 
 -
 
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
 
Sad to see this. Sad like learning an old friend you used to hang around with has died. It shouldn't really make a difference; you haven't spoken in years and there was no chance of you ever rekindling your friendship, but it draws a line under a period in your life.

I was basically a kid when I joined Seethru. 18 years old, working as a temp having just come out of college. Had never driven a car. Now I'm nearly 30, married, got a mortgage, and I'm going grey. Someone from Seethru was best man at my wedding.

I wonder if Darryn is ever overwhelmed by the huge impact his site has had on the lives of the people who have posted here for all that time. And it all just sort of... happened.

Thanks for all the great times, TMO. It's been emotional.
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
If someone were to set up a new website that were exactly the same as this one, I'd definitely post on it.
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
It's still going to be here, though, right? Just no new posters and no new posts? We'll be able to read old threads...?
 
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
 
Probably worth downloading it all just in case
 
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
 
You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone. Oh yes.

Great times. Great times. The intensity of emotion that could be stirred up via the interweb always amazed me, and has never been equalled. Though I do get the occasional cold-veined feeling when Thorn's horrible to me on Facebook, just for old times' sake.

How weird, though. I haven't been back here for months, and here's a new thread, of a few days old. Did we all detect a disturbance in the force?
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
I think for me, tmo definitely facilitated in my delusion that I could write, and has been the launchpad for more than one creative endeavour. It probably contributed to my ill-advised journey into unemployment and borderline alcoholism as I used the delusions to build a hall of mirrors for myself. I made some good pals, got well mashed up at a variety of exciting london events. i suppose it'll never go away as long as i'm still in contact with everybody from it, and i am on a daily basis. apart from a change of girlfriend, things are pretty much as they were when i joined. still corporate, still living in london, still living a pretty similar lifestyle. No kids, no marriage. stasis.

[ 02.12.2011, 10:13: Message edited by: Kanye West ]
 
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
 
For me, it cemented the delusion that I was at least fleetingly amusing, and has furthered my failure to develop any other way of forming relationships. Still, it gets me by.

Just read the thread featuring ralph's cum face. Laughed so much my throat aches. That special TMO office laugh.
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
Herbs, if it's any consolation, it was no delusion; you really were fleetingly amusing.
 
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
 
It's closing.

How bizarre.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
we should have one last meat.
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
All the other forums apart from Life have gone 'archive only' already? WTF? I was thinking of posting something.

Where does everyone go these days?

I hang out on Quora quite a lot, though they have a no humour policy which would probably put some people off. Fucking Stephen Fry was all over it a few weeks ago, but fortunately he's fucked off again now.

Google Plus is ok, but about 95% wank. Haven't found anywhere anything like TMO, obviously.
 
Posted by Kanye West (Member # 837) on :
 
facebook, twitter. Feel like I've "failed, badly" at twitter. My winning personality and complex, layered satire are lost there, and instead I am reduced to simply providing an island of calm, poignant navel gazing in a sea of memes, lols, and brags. facebook i use mostly for derailing conversations, gently pushing normal discussions about boring life shit into the realm of the fictional, the magical, and the absurd.

I think really I've realised that I don't have any authentic interest in other people's lives, and see their stories as launchpads my own unique brand of passive-aggressive fuckwittery.
 
Posted by jnhoj (Member # 286) on :
 
Cheers for guiding seventeen year old me through my first ecstasy pill seethru / tmo...and just adding a bit more ...culture / cynicism / bollocks, to a chap from Derby. Ten years. brrr.
 
Posted by jnhoj (Member # 286) on :
 
Also for introducing me to benway, who I recently shared a cocktail with in a Rio roof top swimming pool as a result of our selling shit via the medium of adverts for dell.

I hang out on www.rllmukforum.com - in theory it's about games but they do all sorts.

[ 02.12.2011, 15:13: Message edited by: jnhoj ]
 
Posted by Samuelnorton (Member # 48) on :
 
It may well be my last post on here, but I have to say that Ben's last contribution was incredibly moving.
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Samuelnorton:
It may well be my last post on here, but I have to say that Ben's last contribution was incredibly moving.

tl;dr

What was the gist of it?

[/2011 web attention span crisis]

[ 06.12.2011, 09:28: Message edited by: dang65 ]
 
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
 
You know that Nyan Cat animation thing, right?

 -

(Yes, the Internet really did progress that far whilst TMO slept.)

Well, there is apparently an emoticon for that, and it looks like this...

~=[,,_,,]:3

...and people are using it, on the Internet.

And none of them seem to have realised that it's clearly someone having a wank.

What the hell is going on when people think that emoticon resembles a flying cat-headed pop-tart instead of a firmly grasped cock and balls?

There is much work to be done.
 
Posted by Brian Munich (Member # 2342) on :
 
It will be a sad day - but TMO and seethe rue will live forever in our hearts. Like a good tapeworm. One that keeps the weight off but doesn't pop out of your jacksy like a tail.
 
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
 
Fuck.
 
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by ben:
Or possibly, when I stopped being intense I stopped being ben.

I had a weird experience about a month ago, related to TMO personas. I was in the US for the first time ever, visiting a city called Charlotte, which, so far as I could tell was like the US equivalent of Reading. I was there completely on my own for a work trip. On the first night I landed got chatting in a restaurant to a guy called Robert. He worked in the Food and Drinks industry, so he knew all the local bar staff and we went on a kind of impromtu pup crawl, starting with Jaeger shots at a bowling alley, and going downhill from there. Then there was this Mexican bar with this drunk dude hassling us, and Robert turned to the barman and said “I don’t like this guy”, and the barman said “forget about him, he’s gone”, and had him thrown out. That was awesome. Evening ended on a somber note in an Irish bar with Robert talking about how he’d watched his dad die. I said I was going to the loo, and left the building because I was worried he was going to leave me with the bar tab. From there I tried to get into a couple of other places; one I got into and promptly got turfed out of "for being drunk" (seriously, what kind of bar is this?), and another I was refused entry to ("No way dude, you're way too drunk"). The last thing I remember was falling down down two flights of concrete steps and thinking "wow, that was exactly the kind of evening Thorn Davis would have had".

********************

Hard to know what to add to a closing time thread. The website felt like a big part of my life for a long time. Like a lot of other people I struggle to sum it up when telling "real" folk about it (usually as part of a 'how did you meet your wife?' story). It still feels like it was the best discussion forum on the internet; I've never seen another one that was as fast and funny and had so many people engaging so deeply with it, or one where people could play with identity and humour and seriousness and silliness so deftly in the space of a single post and still be understood. It was awesome, it's unrepeatable and now that facebook and twitter have essentially killed this kind of community, we can lean back as old timers, like ageing punk rockers, and comment on how we were part of it when it meant something, before it was all about money. Or how many friends you got - after all there was always just as much prestige on TMO in alienating as many people as possible over the course of an afternoon. #nostalgia.
 
Posted by Brian Munich (Member # 2342) on :
 
THE EXPENDABLES
WRITTEN BY KEVIN BACON

EXT. RIVER OF THAMES - NIGHT. 2001.
The MOONLIGHT reflects off the calm dark body of water. Like my body. Hard. Ripply. The outline of an anchored 25,000 ton CARGO SHIP (THE SEETHRU) is barely discernible.

CUT TO: INT. - SHIP
BOUND HOSTAGES (Mike and his wife Luce, site designer Jake, content writer Sophie, technology expert Brandon and Reece Wilson) are being shoved and kicked into the centre of the ship’s HOLD.

CUT TO: SHIP’S HOLD
The PIRATE LEADER, DAVID MCCANDLESS, bellows orders and the PIRATE CREW kick the HOSTAGES to their knees, while dragging them into a straight line. The LEADER orders another PIRATE, LONDON, holding a small VIDEO CAMERA to begin filming.

MCCANDLESS (in Shoreditchese)
This series has failed tho. Now someone has to pay! Information is not beautiful when it shows no audience figures and a nazi-sympathiser on the chat room. This was the first time (pron. tee-yime) we tried to do cross platform with Internet. And Rick J fucked us inna ass. Well, Rick J and a shite (pron. shi’ite) script. And David Walliams, who is no Kevin Bacon. But mostly Rick.

MCCANDLESS takes a GLOBAL G21 BONING KNIFE from another PIRATE WEARING SKINNY TROUSERS AN IRONIC TSHIRT AND SHIT 1980s TRAINERS. Glowering through his bias cut at MIKE, he raises the BLADE. Suddenly, MCCANDLESS’ raised hand is dotted with infrared laser dot things. Off guns and that.

BENNY ROSS
Poot thee knife down, blossom, or tut’ll end thaffle for ee.

THORN CHRISTMAS
I will totally shoot all of them before you shoot one of them. I totally will. Totally. I’ll shoot that one then I’ll roll and shoot that one then I’ll shoot that one with my hand behind my back and I’ll throw a knife at that one and that one will get it. I’ll chew him. That one will be naked and I’ll be oily and I’ll tug him off like blam like a fuckn fist-beaked woodpecker and th...

BENNY ROSS
*shoots*

THORN CHRISTMAS
*shoots*

HERBS
*shoots*

MART
*shoots*

BENWAY
*shoots*

RAZ
*shoots*

NEW WAY OF DECAY
*shoots*

SYDNEY
*shoots*

CHERRY IN HOVE
*shoots*

OCTAVIA
*shoots*

RINGO
*shoots*

CARTER
*shoots*

DANG65
*shoots*

MISCELLANEOUS FILES
*shoots*

EVERYBODY ELSE
*shoots*

CUT TO: INT. - BRITISH LIBRARY

BENNY ROSS
Mr. Bacon?

BACON
Youknowitbitch. How much you bench these days? I skinnied down to play bad guys. America today. Bad guys have to be European or skinny. We’re fat, frightened people. Fiennes nailed the Euro vote, but didja see me as the skinny paedo? I actually fucked the kid. Nothing by halves. And still benching 340 with my cock while my balls do cardio. You know my cock invented the word ‘woot’. See that all over twitter. Woot, woot, it’s the sound of my wad. You’re not easy to contact, Ben. We’re just waiting for two more motherfuckers.

CUT TO: CHURCH DOORS OPEN. SMOKE. TWO FIGURES AGAINST A MOONLIT SKY.

STATLER
They killed Seethru now they want to kill TMO?

WALDORF
Kill? Put out of its misery.

STATLER
Misery? I love misery?

WALDORF
Then you’re gonna love the rest of this laboured gag.

STATLER
My wife wore one of those.

WALDORF
No wonder your child has serious underlying issues and finds dealing with common concerns traumatic. He should brush off problems with a song and just be happy. We can show how this applies to disabled children and children of ethnic minorities. But not gays.

STATLER
Ho ho ho, etc.

BACON reaches into his jacket and withdraws a PHOTO, which he hands over to BENNY. He looks at BENNY’S FOREARM and eyes the ‘EXPENDABLES’ tattoo of the RAVEN on a PIE. BENNY eyes the photo. It is the image of a MIDDLE-AGED man. His chest looks like HOMER SIMPSON.

BACON
That’s a picture of Darryn Rotisserie, Leader of Teemo, which is a small, barely developed chatroom nation due east of Hamsterdam. Ten years ago, Darryn took the people of Seethru and made himself headman. And Teemo has been a human rights graveyard since.

BACON shows BENNY a picture of KURT RUSSELL.

BENNY ROSS
Jesus Christ. They cut off Kurt Russell’s legs?

BACON
No. That’s Jonesy999. He’ll be your contact.

TWO DRUMS and a CYMBAL roll down the stairs. BUDUMM-TISH.

+++

Author note:
I didn’t fuck a kid. I imagineered my character and face fucked a dwarf wearing school uniform. That’s method. I learned that offa Larry Oliveyey, who fucked a whole garrison of dwarves dressed as Schutzstaffel for his role in Wild Geese II. But what I meant to say is Happy Christmas and this may be shit but it’s my way of saying goodbye and TMO meant a lot to me.

Bisous

Kelvis x
 
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
 
Fuck yeah.
 
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
 
Well it was inevitable, but it is still a very sad day when it happens.

I was drawn to Seethru by a link from my mate Rene - the wonderful 'Bullies Reunited' - having dipped my toe in the water I slowly submerged myself in to the first proper website that I'd visit daily with eagerness - the antics and humour of the posters were as enthralling as the content. I felt like the awkward kit at a party - a little bit socially inept but something kept drawing me back to the place. When Seethru called it a day, I'd already become real-life pals with Darryn thanks to us both being expats in the same city so the move to TMO was a given, if anything just to keep the support for his new venture.

The funny thing is I always felt out of my depth on TMO. I was overawed at the talent of the posters on here and constantly felt inferior - I mean when you amongst others genuine published authors and the medium of communication is primarily writing, well it can be extremely daunting trying to write in response anything. But this was the cutting edge of the internet at the time - like Thorn so rightly stated this was like 1970's London and we were the punks at the revolution with Darryn the Malcolm McClaren of the era - reinventing the Genre in a new home (much like McClaren did after his time in New York). Thorn was Johnny Rotten - full of vitriol and spite and Benway his Sid Vicious- their united spite often against each other yet ultimately a great double act would often have me both intimidated yet entertained to the hilt. Ben was a bit Strummer to me - a bit more serious and political. Mikee so Iggy - the first one to get his cock out to get his point across. And AMP was Polly Styrene - harsh but could sometimes sing so sweetly when she needed to get her point across. And so the list could go on....

Me - I kinda felt like Jimmy Pursey I suppose. I mean I wanted to be Joey Ramone but I think my place was as someone who was always around who could shout a lot but not actually say a great deal. But I was never cast out and was kind of accepted for my loyalty, if nothing else. And I did feel at home, if somewhat uncomfortable at times.

It was only when I got to meet you people for real that I actually realized that as well as being scary, vicious and sickeningly talented - and you will hate me for saying this - but you were also endearingly funny, warm and delightful company. I've honestly made some of the best friends on here I could ever imagine. I've laughed so hard with you, Rocked with you, got horribly drunk with you,had the most deepest and soul-searching conversations with you, cried with you and seen even the next generation of TMO-Spawn enter this world and grow (and you can add a +1 to that list come the beginning of February). And when Waynster v2 grows up, I'll tell him about you shower of bastards and all the fun we have had - and I hope even without this here forum - will continue to when we get together wherever it is in the world.

So we now stand all united in grief to say our fond farewells to the site that brought us together - TMO - Lays in rest in a coffin afore us. We bow our heads with tears in our eyes as the curtains part and the coffin makes its final journey towards the flames. As it does a tune is piped through to help it along it's way to the next life. It sounds oh so familiar yet long forgotten. Eye's fleetingly meet as we try to recall the song - small whispers - anyone ? What is it? And then.....

'Is it The Chain by Fleetwood Mac?'

Well fuck it, someone had to before it went [Big Grin]

Goodbye TMO. I'll miss you and all who sailed on her.
 
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
 
 -
 
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
 
It was fun. Thank you. Bye.
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
I'm really sad now I've realised this is the only thread that can be posted on. For some reason (despite Darryn's perfectly clear first post) I thought it was No New Threads only and that old threads could still be posted on. [Mad] [Mad] [Mad]

Can't we all give Dazzler money?
 
Posted by squirrelandgman (Member # 201) on :
 
Ta ra
 
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
 
So, it's goodnight frome me......
 
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
 
This is the only thread still open, right?
 
Posted by Damon's Off (Member # 3) on :
 
HOW DOES THIS FUCKING THING WORK AGAIN???

Wait, am I allowed to swear?
 
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
 
****
 
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
 
Nope
 
Posted by froopyscot (Member # 178) on :
 
Not dead yet!

... just checking.
 
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
 
It's still twitching, like the errant tremors in a dying mouse's leg as it succumbs to the poison it ingested just a few hours before.

Keep prodding it with a broom and it will continue to hang on I am sure
 
Posted by Octavia (Member # 398) on :
 
*prod*
 
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
 
Hello all. Just checking in.
 
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
 
quote:
Originally posted by Carter:
Hello all. Just checking in.

Hey Carter.
 
Posted by StevieX (Member # 91) on :
 
It seemed a crying shame not to stop by and pay my respects. Despite the last rites having been performed some seven years ago, I was pleasantly surprised to note that this old place is clinging doggedly to life like some spiteful dowager great-aunt. Even more surprised that my login details were still so easily remembered. So. What's new?
 
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
 
This place just popped into my head, so I googled, and it's still here.

Wow.

Hello, anyone.

I love you.
I'm sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
 


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