I'm very fond of the little Tesco that sprung up in my village. I even wrote them a little note suggesting that it might be fun to include allergy warnings on their packaging like some other supermarkets do. This makes me happy.
Immensely chuffed was I when they not only introduced this idea of telling me when I'm going to be poisoned by some of their food, but went one step further and introduced a 'Free From' range, where all of the food is made in special conditions so that I am completely safe with anything marked a smiley face, a tick and the words "dairy produce". And they make muffins. Double chocolate muffins. With rice flour, which makes them so sweet and rich and lovely...
And here I am a week later, feeling like I have flu and covered in hives. I itch everywhere and can't stop sneezing and eyes watering. Why are Tescos so horrible and cruel to me? Hmpf.
I shall disappear into the kitchen soon to make my own gooey double chocolate chip muffins. And they shall be good.
I hope. Posted by omikin (Member # 37) on :
if you will make these lifestyle choices...
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Ha! That is just desserts for shopping at Tesco, which is second only to Wal-Mart in the really bad supermarket stakes. They promote poverty-line labour, starve illegal immigrants, pollute and block the roads with freight and fly aubergines in from Argentina where they are harvested by one legged disadvantaged merpeople.
Your unethical foodstuff shopping has reaped it's reward. And, you probably wouldn't have allergies in the first place if you hadn't blindly consumed pesticides and organophosphates for years.
Louche: perpetually brimming with damp eyed sympathy.
Posted by Astromariner (Member # 446) on :
L-Louche? Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
My local 24 hour Tesco employs deaf slaves to stack shelves at night. Seriously.
Tesco Metro on the other hand, is staffed entirely by cute teenage girls, apart from their supervisor who can breathe fire and may have scales instead of skin.
Posted by Louise (Member # 96) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Your unethical foodstuff shopping has reaped it's reward. And, you probably wouldn't have allergies in the first place if you hadn't blindly consumed pesticides and organophosphates for years.
I thought that current medical thinking was exactly the opposite? Maybe it's the fact that the bulk of my food has always been organic, home grown produce that has caused my allergies?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Fucksake, mate, I don't actually care what you eat/have eaten.
When has anyone suggested that organic food gives you allergies?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Why don't you make your own cakes with your weirdo rice flour?
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louise: went one step further and introduced a 'Free From' range, where all of the food is made in special conditions so that I am completely safe...
'Free From' range includes:
Sugar - Free from fat, gluten and eggs Butter - Free from eggs, gluten and sugar Flour - Free from sugar, eggs and fat Eggs - Free from gluten, fat (sort of) and sugar
Suggested recipe:
Mix together, bake for about an hour, eat. With chocolate to taste.
Posted by Louise (Member # 96) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louise: I shall disappear into the kitchen soon to make my own gooey double chocolate chip muffins. And they shall be good.
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Why don't you make your own cakes with your weirdo rice flour?
What a brilliant idea. Why didn't I think of it before? Posted by Louise (Member # 96) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Fucksake, mate, I don't actually care what you eat/have eaten.
Neither do I, I guess that's the problem.
quote:When has anyone suggested that organic food gives you allergies?
Any time I ever tell anyone that I have an allergy. Except you, obviously.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Why not try not telling people you have an allergy? Just talk about extra large condoms instead. And to field those questions about why are you eating that/ not eating this? use the time honoured witty riposte of fuck off.
Posted by Louise (Member # 96) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Why not try not telling people you have an allergy? Just talk about extra large condoms instead. And to field those questions about why are you eating that/ not eating this? use the time honoured witty riposte of fuck off.
Ok. Fuck off. Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Whenever someone tells me they have an "allergy" (in that aggrieved yet slightly proud tone of voice), a part of my brain spirals into one of its favourite fantasies, the one in Utopia AD where The Elite (ie people like me) rule over the evolutionary losers (ie mammals who claim allergy to milk, colourblind spastics like Thorn). They get squashed by cows. I laugh. There are also lots of horses, pirates and ninjas.
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
Louise, I have never heard of people saying about a link between eating organic food and someone having allergies. I work for a charity that does loads of research into allergens and their effects and I was just looking on our research intranet but can't find anything on it. Do you know where this research is from?
I can kind of understand to a certain degree why people might think that, as in exposure to a potentially allergen inducing substance from an early age means that the body naturally produces the anti-histamines for it so therefore you don't usually become allergic to it, but that's not always the case. As far as I'm aware food allergies are slightly different, although its all to do with histamine levels in the body, isn't it?
Wouldn't you be more likely to have food allergies if you have a diet that is full of preservatives and chemicals in foods as the body cannot tolerate them as well as natural substances and therefore the intestines etc become inflamed, histamine is produced and bingo, your allergic reaction is taking place.
I may be wrong and all of the above may not be a exact medical depiction of allergies, but is my understanding of it. I'm only asking because I'm interested, not trying to dispute it or anything!
eta: Do you know what it was in your "Free From" Muffin that caused your reaction?
[ 19.07.2004, 08:37: Message edited by: Uber Trick ]
Posted by scrawny (Member # 113) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: Why not try not telling people you have an allergy? Just talk about extra large condoms instead. And to field those questions about why are you eating that/ not eating this? use the time honoured witty riposte of fuck off.
Louche, you were equally negative on the extra large condoms thread. I hate it when this place sinks so quickly into vitriol just because of who posted, not because of what they posted. If, say, Uber had posted something about an allergic reaction to something that claimed to be hypo-allergenic (or whatever), I don't think you'd have been quite as vociferous.
Louise, the big supermarkets LIE to us, all the time, and plus Tesco's tried to kill me once with horrible chicken. Having said that I am still in their servitude because Tesco Metro 24 is just down the road from my house and I need their fishsticks.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
quote:Originally posted by scrawny: Louche, you were equally negative on the extra large condoms thread.
Absolutely seriously, scrawny, have you got a real problem with me? I don't think anything I have posted on this thread has been deliberatly vindictive and VP has posted stuff on a par with what I have. I have also, probably quite justifiably been told to fuck off and asked why am I allowed to read. Why is it me who is deliberatly picking on one poster? I am not. I'm admittedly being arsey, but Louise has her opportunity to respond, and has done.
Posted by scrawny (Member # 113) on :
Because you asked her why she was allowed to post, she responded with why you were allowed to read. 'Fuck off' was also your suggested response to her if anyone commented on what she ate, and was not necessarily aimed at you.
Not a problem with you especially, although I do thing being negative seems to be part of your 'deal', and it's quite irritating watching people get slagged just because they're not known for being particularly heavyweight posters. Like the Steely-baiting, it all seems to me like cheap thrills that get really dull after a while.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Fantastic! A fight between a self-loathing Mancunian and a Scouser whacked out on painkillers!
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
Funnily enough, my cock is exactly the same shape as a muffin.
I really should get those warts looked at.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
quote:Originally posted by scrawny: Not a problem with you especially, although I do thing being negative seems to be part of your 'deal', and it's quite irritating watching people get slagged just because they're not known for being particularly heavyweight posters. Like the Steely-baiting, it all seems to me like cheap thrills that get really dull after a while.
I was not being arsey with Louise because she's not a heavyweight poster. I'm being arsey with Louise because I am in a foul mood and she posted something which I thought (and still do think) is rather silly. I will happily be arsey with any heavy-weight or non-heavy-weight poster. I might even do it on demand if people have any suggestions. Which could spawn an interesting discussion about who those heavyweight posters are, seeing as the goal posts around them seem to move frequently. Would perhaps you like me to list the posters I've been a **** to and then we can have an informed debate about whether I target those you consider to be weak?
Yes, my posting persona is negative. I'm getting from your post that this is something you actually disapprove of. But surely if everyone was living in the chirrupping heartland of love and joy the board would be a rather banal place to be?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Darryn.R: Funnily enough, my cock is exactly the same shape as a muffin.
I really should get those warts looked at.
Do you have to make your own cling-film condoms? And offer 'a bite' to old ladies on the bus?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
I don't see anyone offering Louche and myself, clearly suffering from a tolerance intolerance, any kind of sympathy or organic recipes.
Who are the real victims here, huh? Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: the evolutionary losers (ie mammals who claim allergy to milk, colourblind spastics like Thorn).
I haven't seen this week's TV Times yet. Can anyone tell me if it's Wednesday's or Friday's episode when Thorn and VP get back together?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: I haven't seen this week's TV Times yet. Can anyone tell me if it's Wednesday's or Friday's episode when Thorn and VP get back together?
No idea - but apparently it'll get the highest ratings TMO has ever had. It's the big cliffhanger the writers have been leading us up to for, like, years.
Posted by froopyscot (Member # 178) on :
Perhaps Louche should just go on that all-meat diet. Enjoy such delicacies as hamburger muffins with bacon bits. And lard!
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: when Thorn and VP get back together
Duh! Thorn is only allowed in Utopia AD to be locked in a room full of mantraps, with the instructions to escape written in red dots on a pattern of green dots.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Thorn is only allowed in Utopia AD
Lol. I'd forgotten that you used to call your vaj 'Utopia AD'.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
The problem is that Louise hasn't said what she's actually allergic to, and whether or not it was stated on the packaging that the muffin was free from this particular allergen.
Because let's face it, if I had an allergy which brought me out in hives and made me feel shitty, I'd make damn sure I wasn't injesting anything which could bring about an attack. That'd be just plain retarded.
So, Louise, will you please clarify exactly what you're trying to say here? You ate a muffin and had an allergic reaction? That's hardly Tesco's fault. What happens next week:- Louise Drinks Bleach - Damn you Dettol!! ?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
God, I remember the first time you did the "in Reading? I'd rather be in Kate Winslett" joke. I wish I'd just killed myself then.
Then you could amend the RIP on the grave to "I rested in her piece" and it would be even funnier.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Duh! Thorn is only allowed in Utopia AD to be locked in a room full of mantraps, with the instructions to escape written in red dots on a pattern of green dots.
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Lol. I'd forgotten that you used to call your vaj 'Utopia AD'.
Vogon cuntains a room full of mantraps - with escape instructions. LOL.
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
Man, you could cut the sexual tension in here with a spoon...
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Darryn.R: Man, you could cut the sexual tension in here with a spoon...
It's getting very exciting. Will they?/When will they? Just call it a man's intuition.
Posted by scrawny (Member # 113) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: I'm being arsey with Louise because I am in a foul mood and she posted something which I thought (and still do think) is rather silly.
But you're always in a foul mood, just as Louise is always rather silly. How is it that you're allowed to pick her up on that, but I'm not allowed to comment on the fact that you're very negative?
quote: Yes, my posting persona is negative. I'm getting from your post that this is something you actually disapprove of. But surely if everyone was living in the chirrupping heartland of love and joy the board would be a rather banal place to be?
I don't disapprove of it, I just find it quite wearing, in the same way that whiney Julian in the office is hard to sit next to because no matter what the conversation's about, he'll manage to steer it on to how is life is so shit and how everything is shit and how everyone is just shit all of the time. Yes, the boards would be awful if everyone was fluffy and sweet to each other all the time - if this is the way I wanted it, I wouldn't have got involved with you on this thread.
Posted by Abby (Member # 582) on :
I thought that the point of these muffins was that they were in the special "we dont't contain substance X" range, but then she got ill anyway.
If you can say for sure that this was the fault of the muffins then I reckon you can sue their ass! But I suspect that they may have taken some precautions to make sure they were substance-X free to avoid costly law suits and people collapsing and frothing at the mouth in their nice clean stores.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
quote:Originally posted by scrawny: But you're always in a foul mood, just as Louise is always rather silly. How is it that you're allowed to pick her up on that, but I'm not allowed to comment on the fact that you're very negative?
Where have you been 'not allowed to comment on me being negative'? My original question was why I was getting the flak for being mean to poor non heavyweight Louise when the rest of the board had also come down on her like a ton of something not dissimilar to brick? I asked if you disapproved of me being negative and you've now replied. I didn't complain about being 'picked up for it'.
quote:I don't disapprove of it, I just find it quite wearing, in the same way that whiney Julian in the office is hard to sit next to because no matter what the conversation's about, he'll manage to steer it on to how is life is so shit and how everything is shit and how everyone is just shit all of the time.
This, coupled with your above comment about me always being in a foul mood makes me think that either you are selectively ignoring at least half of my posts or I'm getting something catastrophically wrong when I post them. I admit and am perfectly (ironically) happy with the idea that I occasionally splurge self-loathing and self-pity. However, I think that to claim I am perpetually in a foul, whiny and 'life is shit' mood is to charicature me. This is a rather childish example, but this is not a whiny, moody post:
quote:What I posted on Friday: Poor Scrawny! Mix alcohol with hardcore painkillers for weekend on ceiling with no pain. But first strap self to door to prevent drug and alcohol damage to back whilst it is not working. Take door off hinges first as well, otherwise you might look odd.
I'm a bit pissed of with being 'whiney Julian' from the office, but I suppose if that's how you see me not much of this arguing on here is going to change that. Perhaps you might just try not reading all my posts believing I'm some foul tempered monster? Or perhaps not. You decide.
Posted by Louise (Member # 96) on :
Ok, computer goes down for a week, everyone posts. Here goes:
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: Do you know what it was in your "Free From" Muffin that caused your reaction?
It could only be milk. It’s the only thing that I am allergic to. I was just so surprised to find that their ‘Free From’ range – designed to be the safest stuff in the supermarket for me – has been contaminated.
And as for the organic food stuff, I have no idea. People just often say to me that it might be something to do with the hyper-cleanliness and desire to have everything pure and organic that might be causing allergies. As children, we don’t eat enough dirt to build up tolerances to stuff in the way that people have in the past. I am slightly sceptical about this though, because I have always eaten loads of home-grown produce, plenty of dirt, and plenty of allergens. I grew into an allergy that nobody has ever been able to find an excuse for.
quote: Originally posted by scrawny: Louise, the big supermarkets LIE to us, all the time, and plus Tesco's tried to kill me once with horrible chicken.
Yikes, sorry to hear that. I’ve always done all right with Tesco’s which is why I was so taken aback. Like their plain chocolate? Claims to contain milk, according to the allergy warning. No milk in the ingredients list though, so I wonder how it all got in there…
quote:Originally posted by Louche: I'm being arsey with Louise because I am in a foul mood and she posted something which I thought (and still do think) is rather silly.
That’s fair enough, but the reason I felt justified in posting the thread in the first place was because I was pissed off due to general itchiness and feeling shite, and – wahey – a rants forum stumbled into my path. It seemed the natural response.
quote:Oringinally posted by Ringo: The problem is that Louise hasn't said what she's actually allergic to, and whether or not it was stated on the packaging that the muffin was free from this particular allergen.
Sorry, slight oversight. I’m allergic to milk, and the package had a big tick and a smiley face next to the words “Free From Milk Products”.
quote:Originally posted by scrawny: Louise is always rather silly
Sorry, blonde is more than a hair colour in my case.
quote:Originally posted by Abby: If you can say for sure that this was the fault of the muffins then I reckon you can sue their ass!
I’m working on it. I haven’t eaten them for about a week, and the hives, itches, sniffles etc. have passed. Now I’m re-introducing. If hives break out again by the end of the week, I’ll be making my complaints.
Edit due to flipping incompetence.
[ 24.07.2004, 07:56: Message edited by: Louise ]
Posted by damo (Member # 722) on :
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