Faux-Greek lettering on the Grandstand intro. Acres of taut, muscled flesh. Tiny, bendy Romanian gymnasts sobbing. A breathless Sally Gunnell asking, "well, are you pleased with your fourth place?"
Number of drugs scandals: 3 (athletics/swimming/badminton)
Number of weeping gymnasts: 6
Number of dropped relay batons: 2 (Britain/Jamaica)
Percentage of British athletes failing to live up to expectations: 86
Mention of epics/gods/tragedy/Troy: countless thousands
Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
Me too! I love it! Bring it on!
I get a bit too emotional every time someone wins a medal though and end up spending nearly the whole time in tears. Fucking silly mare.
Anyhew, I sincerely hope none of the badminton players get done for drugs. Unless they are Koreans. Because they alway look so dour and Kim Dong Moon wins everything.
Please tell me they are not having bloody curling this year though. Why did they show so much of it last time? It was as exciting as watching soup grow cold.
Posted by StevieX (Member # 91) on :
Curling = Winter games
Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
Thank god it won't be on again then!
Is there a summer boredom equivalent? Maybe small bore rifle shooting?
Posted by Astromariner (Member # 446) on :
I love watching: the athletics, swimming, (synchronised swimming is a special treat if I manage to catch it) diving, gymnastics, showjumping and eventing. Everything else bores the tits off me.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Oh yes, Astro, you have just listed all my favourite events!
Stuff like fencing, archery and shooting should be fun, but they don't do it properly like in films.
Even watching the pointless filler like tae kwando and table tennis is amusing for the commentators trying desperately to sound enthused and knowledgable.
Plus, I think Colin Jackson might be joining the lovely Roger Black to form an unbeatably hott ex-athletico TV presenting duo.
Posted by philomel (Member # 586) on :
quote:Originally posted by Astromariner: I love watching: the athletics, swimming, (synchronised swimming is a special treat if I manage to catch it) diving, gymnastics, showjumping and eventing. Everything else bores the tits off me.
Yes. And ice-skating in the Winter Olympics. Although not swimming, so much.
Posted by Abby (Member # 582) on :
I think there should be more athletes beating each other up with iron bars like that psycho ice skating woman.
Or more hopelessly rubbish people who got in just because they were the least rubbish in their whole country like the swimming bloke last time.
Aaaand....they should be encouraged to take lots of drugs so that they go super fast, leaving trails of smoking tarmac behind.
Yup.
Posted by Astromariner (Member # 446) on :
I love the ice-skating in the winter olympics! I could watch it all day. Although I prefer figure skating (where they do the exciting stuff like triple salkos and death-spins) to ice-dance, which looks too easy to be impressive: I always think "I could do that, nae bother". The rivalry between countries makes it more interesting though - I remember when Torvil and Dean did their last Olympics (grand finale to Let's Face the Music and Dance) and all the french press made jokes about poor Jane Torvil looking like a flying pig.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Ice skating is the only good thing in the Winter games though, and you don't need to be in a wintry country to have an ice rink.
So, I propose scrapping the winter games and adding ice skating to Astro's list to make My Ideal Olympycks.
I also propose a DrugsAided Games, where athletes can only compete if they have taken performance enhancing drugs. How fast could they go? Which drugs would be most effective?
Posted by philomel (Member # 586) on :
Oh! Oh! There is a programme on Channel 4 tonight about the effects of drugs on performance, testing various substances on athletes and seeing which ones do best (I think).
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Ice skating is the only good thing in the Winter games though...
There's ski-jumping, luge and the good old four man bob. Winteralimpex rocks my world. I want to make some Thornesque comment about liking the event so much that it makes me jizz a stream of pure ice, but I'm not sure it'd be advisable.
Posted by Astromariner (Member # 446) on :
The four-man bob, like ice dance, loses valuable interest points by looking like a total piece of piss, especially for the people who sit in the middle. So far as I can see, their only tasks are: sit still; keep head down.
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
I have to admit that I don't give a fuck about watching sports. I have occasionally watched ice skating, and did indulge in a stoned watching of some fit men running once (Commonwealth games, maybe?) which culminated in me and London in fits of giggles by encouraging them to Run to momma!, and out of the two I would also be in favour of the Winter Olympics - but I'd rather play SSX Tricky.
This isn't to say that I don't think its a great achievement what these athletes have done blah-de-blah but I just don't get a thrill out of watching it.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Astromariner: The four-man bob, like ice dance, loses valuable interest points by looking like a total piece of piss, especially for the people who sit in the middle. So far as I can see, their only tasks are: sit still; keep head down.
But like all good sport, you're waiting for something to go wrong. Of course I don't care about a bunch of guys sliding down a mountain in a metal sausage skin. But if there's a chance they might fall out, "flip the bob" or generally get injured, then it gets much more interesting.
Besides, they have to run fast, push and jump before they get to the siting still stage.
Posted by Ringo (Member # 47) on :
perhaps if they made the track a little wider and sent them down 5 at a time it'd be more interesting. Possibly also making it steeper and a lot longer, like down the side of a mountain?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: I just don't get a thrill out of watching it.
It's not a "thrill", so much as the pleasure of lying on your bed cramming Pringles into your gob yelling RUN FASTER YOU USELESS WASTER, and enjoying dropping comments like, look at that technique, man, no control! as though you knew what you were talking about. This is why watching all sport is good. All good sports, I mean, not the rubbish ones like rugby/cricket/golf etc.
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
Yeah, I can see the potential VP, and as mentioned have indulged once or twice but I haven't got the anticipation thing going on like you guys Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
I love the Olympics, especially the swimming. I used to swim competitively myself, which is probably why I like the swimming so much and it was all very much enhanced by the fact that two Dutch swimmers did so incredibly well in the last Olympics. AND they both train at my gym! The girl has really huge shoulders and NO bum at all.
Apart from the swimming I like the diving and all the running events. I'll watch anything else if it happens to be on though and if I'm tired/lazy/pissed enough I really get into it. We spent one ski-ing holiday watching curling every night after the pub. We even got to know the names of all the curlers (?) and could comment on their technique as if we knew what we were talking about.
I'm looking forward to the Olympics. When does the whole shebang start?
Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
Sorry - I just realised I came across as a total h8r and I did that thing which I get annoyed about myself, so to save you the hassle and to act as recompense VP, please be insured that I am right now giving myself a severe talking to, to be followed by an hour of self-flagellation.
edit: ON-TOPIC - Maybe self-flagellation could be an Olympic sport?
edit edit: lol, VP, sorry, I said Astro. I I'll add an extra 30 mins.
[ 12.08.2004, 09:18: Message edited by: Uber Trick ]
Posted by Fionnula the Cooler (Member # 453) on :
Who cares about the sport when Bjork will be singing at the opening ceremony, dressed as a mountain and lake. Apparently. Hooray!
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
Turbo! In your position as curling afficionado, maybe you can enlighten me on something that's vexed me for years.
When the people with the broom scrub frantically in front of the anvil (or whatever it is that's serenely floating down the ice) are they trying to make it go faster, and thus further, or slow it down to make it stop on the target?
[Off topic - just back from an interview for that job for which i had to answer the 'bring your gays to work' question. I was so nervous I spent the hour beforehand in the khazi, and am now on a post-stress high. So do forgive me.[
Posted by Modge (Member # 64) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: When the people with the broom scrub frantically in front of the anvil (or whatever it is that's serenely floating down the ice) are they trying to make it go faster, and thus further, or slow it down to make it stop on the target?
I am not Turbo, but...
They do it to decrease the friction and make it travel faster (and therefore presumably further) and also to make it curve less. I think the curving reason is why the sweepers tend to go most mad towards the end of the stone's run.
Posted by StevieX (Member # 91) on :
Supplementing Modge:
The stone (which prolly has some kind of 'proper' name...) will naturally follow a line of least resistance (ie path of least friction), so the folks with the brushes can actually cause a small change in direction by their efforts.
Monumentally dull, but true nontheless.
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
Unfortunately, I'm not the font of all wisdom on curling as I was drunk for most of my curling viewing. My experience is limited to "the blonde bloke with the funny nose is good". However, here is Turbo's Guide to Curling:
Curling is played within a curling rink on a playing surface ice called a 'sheet' with granite stones. The goal of the game is, after all 16 stones are played (8 by each team), to have a stone of your team's closest to the center of the house, called the 'tee'. This is accomplished by sending your stone to rest in scoring position by utilizing one of many shots. Some for these are a 'draw', by knocking your opponent's stones out of scoring position (a 'takeout'), and by guarding your own stones with others. The team with the closest stone to the 'tee', inside the house, scores a point, or more if they also have the second closest stone and so on. Each round is called an 'end' and consists of two stones delivered by each player on each four-player team. The stones are delivered from the hack on one side of the sheet to the house on the opposite side. This consists of the player pushing off from the hack with the stone and releasing it with a spin, or 'curl'.
Sweeping Either a curling brush or broom is used to sweep in the game. Sweeping fine tunes the shots, and sweeping is what makes curling truly a team sport.
Sweeping affects the ice in front of the moving stone in three ways:
Smoothing or polishing the pebble, Removing frost or debris, Momentarily warming the ice to create a thin film of water under the stone that acts as a lubricant.
As a result, a swept stone will lose its momentum more slowly and thus travel further. For draw shots, good sweepers will sweep just enough to bring the stone to its desired position. On takeouts, sweeping will hold a stone on the line of delivery longer and reduce the amount of curl.
More here.
Posted by Doctor Agamemnon When (Member # 189) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: I have to admit that I don't give a fuck about watching sports.
Yeah, me an' all.
However, that Opening Ceremony was pretty spectacklier. I thought I'd taken drugs or something.
Compelling viewing. Is it out on video yet?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by Doctor Agamemnon When: glowing pregnants
What the fuck was that all about?
I have been enjoying the bendygymnastics and, surprisingly, the badminton.
I don't like the contrast between the muscled bullets of the swimmers' bodies, the slender toned grace of the gymnasts' bodies, and my body, though. Are they taking the piss?
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Fuck fuck FUCK.
Four of your English years ago I was freelancing from home (ie. idling) and spent the whole summer watching the Sydney Olympics - it was Ceefax page gr888. FFWD to the present and I'm sweating in a portacabin just hearing about it. How sucky is that. Posted by Doctor Agamemnon When (Member # 189) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Glowing Pregnants... What the fuck was that all about?
Um, "The Future" or something. Or why not to shag on the beach.
Or a warning against drinking too many Ouzo and Uranium cocktails.
<neil>Or it could just be that cheese I found under the cooker.</neil>
Posted by Doctor Agamemnon When (Member # 189) on :
On a slightly similar but not quite note, I;d quite like to watch the fencing.
I've never been a big telly watcher.
This year is the first year I've had access to more than the regular 5 terrestrial TV channels, and so I might be able to receive, via the wonders of cable, some sports that I'm interested in.
But, being an irregular telly person, I don't know where to find out when I can watch fencing, or on which channel.
The BBC website has a schedule for the fencing, and a schedule for their coverage of the Olympics... but not a schedule of when they are showing Fencing on the Olympic coverage. Or maybe I missed it.
I don't know if any other UK cable companies are covering the Olympics. The Athens2004 site doesn't help either.
Any ideas? Is there a "universal" TV schedule site that you TV-watchers use to plan your lives?
I'm not even 100% sure which channels I can get on this whizzy cable telly box yet. There's LOTS.
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
But what about the sport of thundergays - synchronised diving? Is that not the gayest game for gayers ever to come out of the tradesman's entrance of the Manor of the Third Earl of Gaylordshire, Nancytown, Bottingford?
And the fact that we won a medal doesn't make it any less gay.
Posted by Doctor Agamemnon When (Member # 189) on :
quote:Originally posted by herbs: Is that not the gayest game for gayers ever to come out of the tradesman's entrance of the Manor of the Third Earl of Gaylordshire, Nancytown, Bottingford?
A bit of olive oil and some leather hotpants, and you'd be wrong.
Posted by Samuelnorton (Member # 48) on :
quote:Originally posted by Doctor Agamemnon When: The BBC website has a schedule for the fencing, and a schedule for their coverage of the Olympics... but not a schedule of when they are showing Fencing on the Olympic coverage. Or maybe I missed it.
Check out Eurosport. As the coverage is designed for a pan-European audience, all of the events are given pretty fair coverage. Fencing might not be big here, but it makes news in France and Italy.
And there are no pointless interviews with twats like Tim Henman.
Posted by Doctor Agamemnon When (Member # 189) on :
quote:Originally posted by Samuelnorton: Check out Eurosport
Cheers!*
14-Aug 23:15 Fencing 15-Aug 23:15 Women's Epee Final 16-Aug 00:15 Men's Foil Final
Hmm. Comprehensive. Ah, well - cable TV is great for, um, shopping for 9ct gold hoop earrings and fruiot juicing machines. And Trisha, apparently.
* Genuine 'cheers' for Snorton, Nil Points for Eurosport.
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
The Olympics never fail to surprise me with sports I never thought of as sports. I mean, shooting, what's that all about? I really don't think you can class a person who can run 500 m incredibly quickly in the same league as someone who can shoot a target with a gun. Or can you? Surely on eof those gun-shooter-people doesn't need to be top fit with mega muscles and special diets and everything. Or am I just ignorant?
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by turbo: The Olympics never fail to surprise me with sports I never thought of as sports. I mean, shooting, what's that all about? I really don't think you can class a person who can run 500 m incredibly quickly in the same league as someone who can shoot a target with a gun. Or can you? Surely on eof those gun-shooter-people doesn't need to be top fit with mega muscles and special diets and everything. Or am I just ignorant?
Funnily enough I was talking to VP about an old friend of mine who did olympic level shooting. At a school reunion back when I was 18, the biggest wankers in our year were deriding the achievement in much the same way you are now, and it's difficult to put across how bitter, ignorant and pathetic they sounded. You really had to be there, I guess.
But anyway. I think maybe if you try shooting and realise the concentration and skill it requires it becomes a different matter. Or maybe I'm biased because my shakes mean that it's something I'll never be good at, and so I'll defer totally to people who can achieve a measure of success at it.
Posted by discodamage (Member # 66) on :
have you ever picked up a shotgun, turbo? i dont think they are made of styrofoam. boy racer did clay pigeon shooting at a stag do last year (good evening viewers and welcome to the 21st century!) and the day after he was walking around with floppy gorilla limbs and whining like a big girl that his arms hurt all day.
[ 17.08.2004, 06:33: Message edited by: discodamage ]
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Not all sports are totally about muscles.
I still think it's really interesting that the horsey sports remain the only Olympic event where men and women compete on equal terms.
MeandThorn was talking in the pub after Bourne Supremacy about how boys and girls could compete against each other- surely shooting and archery, and possibly fencing would be obvious ones?
Also, I had a great idea about making sailing more interesting: make piracy an Olympic sport, where competitors have to board each other's vessels and physically wrest the gold medals from each other.
[ 17.08.2004, 06:45: Message edited by: Vogon Poetess ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Also, I had a great idea about making sailing more interesting: make piracy an Olympic sport, where competitors have to board each other's vessels and physically wrest the gold medals from each other.
I think a Pirate triathlon is in order:
Plank Walking Parrot Supporting Wooden Leg Jousting
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: MeandThorn was talking in the pub after Bourne Supremacy about how boys and girls could compete against each other- surely shooting and archery, and possibly fencing would be obvious ones?
I think boxing, too. I'd totally watch male vs female boxing.
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: I think maybe if you try shooting and realise the concentration and skill it requires it becomes a different matter.
That's why I added the bit "Or am I just ignorant?" because I really don't have a clue about shooting. It just doesn't strike me as a very sporty sport, if that makes any sense. The other one is ping pong - to me that is just a silly game you played in friends' basements when you were a kid or at the youth club. To see grown men seriously competing at ping pong struck me as rather funny.
When is a sport really a sport? Why don't they have Olympic darts? Or Olympic snooker?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
My personal definition of sport is something that is a modified form of what primeval humans did as survival ie
running/swimming (away from lions) throwing (spears at lions) jumping over things (ravines) shooting (arrows into mammoths) riding (to round up mammoths) sailing/rowing (to colonise the Pacific)
I would extend that to include anything that combines physical exertion with skill, precision and tactics. So that would include football (because I like it, but not rugby or tennis because they are shit and gay) and gymnastics/figure skating (because of the immense muscle control involved).
Anything else is just a game, really. Darts and snooker and that are skillful, but not sweaty enough.
Posted by Pink (Member # 459) on :
Couldn't one argue that darts are just really small spears?
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by turbo: The other one is ping pong - to me that is just a silly game you played in friends' basements when you were a kid or at the youth club. To see grown men seriously competing at ping pong struck me as rather funny.
YBNBYBN, all sports at a top level are a billion-trillion times harder than just doing it as a hobby or a bit of a larf. I mean, some of us are superb drivers, but I'm not sure that even we could be as good as Michael Schumacher. He makes it look all easy and stuff, and then you see a real F1 car go past in real life and you go... well, nothing, because you can't speak.
And cycling, right. I ride a bike, about 20 miles a day, and don't feel too bad after it. The you watch the Tour de France and they are sprinting up the side of an Alp. For 100 miles at a time.
So, shooting and table tennis, same thing innit. I understand that in the shooting they get something like five shots and they have half an hour to put them in the target. That's six minutes just to line up one shot and have a go. But they're probably going, ohmygod is that the time already, ohmygod! etc.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by Pink: Couldn't one argue that darts are just really small spears?
No, because the fat men that play darts would be too unfit and wheezy to get near any animal in order to dart-spear it.
Posted by discodamage (Member # 66) on :
also, if you think ping pong is what thirteen year olds play in youth clubs, you should go and see ping pong, the japanese film about pingpong! hence the name. it is basically a heartwarming comedy but it has some amazing footage of ping pong. i am not shitting you. bits of it will take your breath away. i am totally down with table tennis as olympic sport now.
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: So that would include football (because I like it, but not rugby or tennis because they are shit and gay)
Yeah why is that? Why do you have Olympic Football and Olympic Tennis and Olympic Volleyball, but no rugby, lacrosse, American football, netball or polo? Why are some team sports deemed Olympic and not others? Is it better to be an Olympic gold football team or a World Cup champion?
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by turbo: When is a sport really a sport? Why don't they have Olympic darts? Or Olympic snooker?
I must admit that some of them seem a bit daft, like when they have soccer and tennis with proper professional players, and Tim Henman. I'd have thought they should leave that sort of thing to the World Cup or Wimbledon and use the Olympics for all the mad stuff that no one ever watches, or even participates in, at any other time. Like synchronised diving.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by turbo: Why do you have Olympic Football and Olympic Tennis and Olympic Volleyball, but no rugby, lacrosse, American football, netball or polo? Why are some team sports deemed Olympic and not others? Is it better to be an Olympic gold football team or a World Cup champion?
There might be an explanation on the official IOC site or something.
As far as I'm aware, there has been Olympic netball in the past. Things like lacrosse, American football and polo are probably not widespread enough across the world to merit consideration.
Football and tennis are fairly recent additions, and I imagine were included because they are popular and crowd pleasing, and nobody could pretend that medal success here equated with Euro/World Cup/Wimbledon glory. I don't know about rugby, don't they only play it in the mud? L
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Things like lacrosse, American football and polo are probably not widespread enough across the world to merit consideration.
And canoeing, beach volleyball and ping pong are??
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the Olympics, I just don't understand them! I also agree with Dang, that they should leave out the popular team sports such as football, tennis and hockey and just concentrate on the 'other' sports. Also, didn't they have ballroom dancing as an Olympic event at some point?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Well, a quick squiz at the IOC site reveals that these:
Cricket Power boating Croquet Rackets Golf Rink-hockey Jeu de paume Roque Lacrosse Rugby Pelote basque Tug of war Polo Water skiing
have all been Olympic sports in the past.
There doesn't seem to be any criteria for Olympic status listed on the site, but if you emailed that nice Irish bloke who presents Olympic Grandstand he might know.
Posted by froopyscot (Member # 178) on :
quote:Originally posted by turbo: Also, didn't they have ballroom dancing as an Olympic event at some point?
It's possible, given that the olympics have included some very unlikely events in the past.
Golf
Cricket
Steeplechase
Rope Climbing
Motorboat Racing
They also discontinued some track and field events that would be best qualified as 'silly', such as an event called 'standing hop, step, jump' (just try to picture a young John Cleese as a competitor).
Posted by froopyscot (Member # 178) on :
Ah, I see VP beat me to it. Oh well. I'll leave mine to show what a comparatively half-assed job I did.
Posted by Samuelnorton (Member # 48) on :
quote:Originally posted by Doctor Agamemnon When: Hmm. Comprehensive. Ah, well - cable TV is great for, um, shopping for 9ct gold hoop earrings and fruiot juicing machines. And Trisha, apparently.
* Genuine 'cheers' for Snorton, Nil Points for Eurosport.
Hmm. I thought cinq points would have been more in order. After all, they do try to cater for fans of all of the events, even those who might want to know what is going on in the heavyweight division of the Greco-Roman wrestling competition, and there are only 24 hours in a day. It's far better than the BBC, whose coverage of the fencing extends to a meaningless ten-minute interview with a British no-hoper who almost inevitably ends up getting thrashed in the first round. The BBC interactive service is good, but they could help themselves by diversifying a little bit more.
That said I did catch the final of the men's double trap shooting this afternoon, which was gr8. And won by one of the al-Makhtoum family. I hope to see more of the shooting, but I feel that the decision to cover this final was motivated by the hope that Sydney gold medallist Richard Faulds would be there to defend his title. He didn't make it through the qualifying round.
[ 17.08.2004, 09:27: Message edited by: Samuelnorton ]
Posted by froopyscot (Member # 178) on :
quote:Pelote basque
I initially read this as 'bisque' and couldn't fathom the idea of soup-eating as a sport.
Someone give me a you idiot! Let me hear ya!
But on second thought, what if this were an olympic event...
(Dream sequence, blurry screen, music, etc)
First Announcer: The competitors are on their marks, and... BEEP there's the starting tone, and they're hovering. Spoons at the ready, they're blowing furiously on their soup-bowls. It looks like the competitor from Kenya is taking a first go, but... oh!, it's too hot, he's let a bit dribble down his chin, and that's an automatic half-point penalty.
Second Announcer: While we're in the crucial cooling phase of this olympic soup event, I should mention that it's proceeding without the American team, as the IOC decided this afternoon to sanction them for illegal application of ice cubes, in the soup-chilling scandal. Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
I have mostly been enjoying the Jim Nastix so far. Especially the crowd yelling at the High Bar judges last night. I think I am a bit in love with Svetlana Khorkina, because she is beautiful and special.
Slightly wonky BBC coverage, though, doncha think? I especially liked Brendan Powell suggesting that the laurel wreath looked good on Kelly Holmes "because she's been in the army and is used to wearing berets and things."
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
I watched some of the opening ceremony on TV in the States, and heard the following from one of the commentators:
"...and here we see a representation of Sophocles, best known for his work Oedipus Rex, in which the protagonist kills his father and marries his own mother... a sequence of events which rarely turns out well..." Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by mart: "...Sophocles, best known for his work Oedipus Rex..."
The bollocks! Everyone knows that's by Woody Allen.
[ 24.08.2004, 06:38: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by StevieX (Member # 91) on :
Watching Paula Radcliffe's interview was akin to watching all of Ellen Macarthur's video diaries in one sitting - it was hot, you were tired/dehydrated/it wasn't your day/whatever! I do think that she has been carrying a ridiculous weight of expectation from segments of the UK media, who seem to veer from extremes of "all our athletes, particularly the swimmers are a national letdown" to the sort of commentary that assumes certain medls are in the bag. I really felt that her approach was a little diminishing towards the winners who ran a hard race. Get over it already!!! I don't think that we need to hear excuses - the difficulty of a marathon is pretty self-evident and unless you have a combination of mental attitude and physical ability, you're not going to finish. Paula lost that mental battle; end of story. No guilt, no recriminations, no mea culpa.
Kelly Holmes' race was superb to watch - great tactical run and she seems a genuinely nice person to boot. I wonder how it would have panned out had Ceplak made her break just a few tenths of a second earlier. CLass.
My favourites have been a bit of everything really; as an ex-competitive swimmer, I really enjoy the swimming events. The badminton was great, another sport that I've always enjoyed playing.
A new development is my appreciation of ladies gymnastics, particularly the floor routines.
Especially Romanian Catalina Ponor - fantastic stuff.
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
The Women's Marathon coverage was pretty bad; constant references to women being distressed, the historic location, and "the taking on of liquid", or drinking as it's sometimes known.
I've kind of been dipping in and out of the coverage; I liked the Archery and Shooting I saw, and I love the Canoeing, and the Badminton, and the Gymnastics, but generally speaking I'm more of a fan of the Winter Games really.
Posted by damo (Member # 722) on :
quote:Originally posted by Boy Racer: but generally speaking I'm more of a fan of the Winter Games really.
"yeah i like the earlier non available stuff a lot more than this readily available stuff."
Posted by StevieX (Member # 91) on :
Edit - to acknowledge my inner handbag
[ 24.08.2004, 09:55: Message edited by: StevieX ]
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
I was looking forward to Torino, actually.
Posted by damo (Member # 722) on :
i've already been. it's shit. not nearly as good as montreal.
Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: I think I am a bit in love with Svetlana Khorkina, because she is beautiful and special.
She's my fave! Immensly graceful.
I've been enjoying all the sports [apart from the bike road races which I find incredibly dull apart from any crashes] but have particliarily liked the gymnastics and of course the badminton.
Funny how all the gymnasts have such old faces though - the little Spanish girly was only 16 but she had the face of a 90 year old.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by saltrock: Funny how all the gymnasts have such old faces though - the little Spanish girly was only 16 but she had the face of a 90 year old.
She is 90 in fact, but has her head transplanted onto the body of a 16 year old gymnast every four years.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by saltrock: Funny how all the gymnasts have such old faces though - the little Spanish girly was only 16 but she had the face of a 90 year old.
I think there should be some sort of regulation that female gymnasts have to have their age clearly displayed at all times. This would give us all something to talk about in between the tumbles, especially while they do that weird half-ballet stuff to get themselves over to the next corner. I'd rather they just walked over there really.
And how old is Anna Pavlova anyway? I feel a bit uncomfortable watching the screen while she's on.
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
6/9/87
Safe
but not right.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
Pavlova shouldn't be making you feel funny, she's got a well dodgy fringe. It should be the ghostly elgance of Khorkina, or the Romanian one Stevie mentioned.
Despite the nightly display of muscly Olympic perfection making me feel must do exercise to become like them! my reaction was distinctly shifty when a friend just emailed me to suggest doing a yoga or pirates course this Autumn. I mean, this is like proper financial commitment to doing exercise. I'd have to buy sporty clothes- trainers, shorts, whatever it is people wear.
Also, who is the BBC binner who reports on sailing, despite clearly not even having a vague nautical knowledge half-remembered from reading Swallows and Amazons fifteen years ago? Always shot silhoutted against the sun setting over the sea, with her dark hair blowing, and her mouth forming nonsense-words. THIS IS NOT SPORTS REPORTING.
Posted by turbo (Member # 593) on :
The other day I was in the gym watching Olympic coverage on the tellies on the wall. They were doing these really exciting indoor cycling sprints and I was on an exercise bike. I was so engrossed in watching the cyclists, that I kept cycling faster & faster & faster until I realised I was bloody exhausted and my leg muscles were burning and why was I cycling so bloody fast?? I think I could have done an Olympic sprint. Actually, if you see they average at speeds of 69 km/h and I'm bloody proud if I cycle at 30 km/h, maybe not...
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Pavlova shouldn't be making you feel funny, she's got a well dodgy fringe.
Fringe? [Looks carefully at picture again] Oh God, yeah! She's got a head!
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Fringe? [Looks carefully at picture again] Oh God, yeah! She's got a head!
Easy to forget when the entire sport seems to be saying "Look at my leotard-clad arse!" At the end of the routine, they even have to turn around a few times and push their prosterior out, to give everyone in the audience a good view. Worrying...
Seriously though, you can't fail to be impressed by the gymnasts' abilities. Some of the floor work in particular was mind-shatteringly fast.
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
Same reaction here to the gymnastics. I think it's because we can all run, jump, swim and throw things - to an extent - that they're not quite as awe-inspiring. There's a foolish part of our brain that whispers "if we tried reeelly reeelly hard, we could do that. Just run a bit faster then normal. Simple..." even if the last lap of the 5000m has just gone in 51 seconds.
Gymnastics - certainly at Olympic level - is so far outside our abilities and experiences that it seems almost otherwordly.
I dunno. Anyone here done gymnastics thinking "ooh, I could get back into that. Dust off the leotard. Yeah!"
Didn't Dazzler do some?
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
I'm perpetually frutrated at the fact I nevet perservered with gymnastics after doing well in the under 11s. I had the co-ordination and upper body strength, but I got so fat during my teens and twenties that I just gave up on the whole thing.
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
I never know when to believe you.
You must get that a lot - does it get frustrating?
Posted by Modge (Member # 64) on :
me and one of my ballet friends did a monster critique of the gymnasts the other day, talking about how rubbish they are at dancing...they never hold the position... they get bonus points for doing a pirouette, how rubbish is that?!... did you see when the Romanian girl did those pas de bourrrees, they were awful... and I was beginning to become very unimpressed with gymnasts when this point came up:
"to be fair, she did those pas de bourrees just after she did a massive tumble with 3 turns and 2 twists, and she didn't even use her hands to do that, so if her footwork was a bit messy, well, it's understandable."
So, yeah. I can almost trick myself into thinking "I could do that", but then I remember how my back doesn't bend as far as it would need to, and that I am not very good at going upside down.
[ 26.08.2004, 06:32: Message edited by: Modge ]
Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Did you see the ladies' pole vaulting? It was like vertical chess.
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
I think it's ridiculous that the women have to do their floor routines to music when the men don't - ditto the quasi-"darnce" flurries that even to my eye look, well, a bit shit. Just links really.
Posted by Carter (Member # 426) on :
On the other hand, watching the Hamm brothers prance around to The Best of...Classical FM would be supersweet.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
I'm struggling to think of a sport that would make best use of such attributes as idleness, physical cowardice and a weakness for alcohol and fatty, salty foods. Any ideas?
Posted by Astromariner (Member # 446) on :
Darts!
Posted by Boy Racer (Member # 498) on :
Darts?
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Darts. Of course. Posted by mart (Member # 32) on :
Darts.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Skittles.
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
As I understand it, it's not supposed to be "proper dancing" in between the tumbling, but enough moves to prove they can do more than just mechanically flip over between corners of the mat.
A lot of them go over and over like little machines, but look really awkward and unbalanced when doing stuff in between. Not like the lovely Svetlana:
multiple image failure: clearly, just too graceful and purty to appear on this site.
Edit: How do I respond to my yoga-inviting friend without sounding like a fat lazy twat?
[ 26.08.2004, 06:55: Message edited by: Vogon Poetess ]
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
What's that one with the round target divided up into slices, each one with a number and then divided again in increasing circles, each representing a multiple of those numbers and you throw little miniature arrows at the target?
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess: Edit: How do I respond to my yoga-inviting friend without sounding like a fat lazy twat?
"Sorry Jemima, but I'd rather be eating SuperNoodles." Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: I'm struggling to think of a sport that would make best use of such attributes as idleness, physical cowardice and a weakness for alcohol and fatty, salty foods. Any ideas?
Yo! [High Five] MONSTER TRUCKS!
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: "Sorry Jemima, but I'd rather be eating SuperNoodles."
Der, my friend's name is Hannah.
Anyway, I just done a Google for swimming pools near me. That pretty much counts as exercise.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Vogon Poetess:
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: "Sorry Jemima, but I'd rather be eating SuperNoodles."
Der, my friend's name is Hannah.
That would have been my second guess. I still reckon my suggestion would make a great sig.
Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: especially while they do that weird half-ballet stuff to get themselves over to the next corner. I'd rather they just walked over there really.
Yes. I quite agree. Load of namby pamby bloody nonsense. All that waving yer arms around, what's gymnastic about that? Huh?
Actually, I am in a truly foul mood today having split up with my fella and as such will not be happy watching anything other than people chopping each other up or possibly Fingerbobs. So I might disappear over to rants and have a damn good..... um, rant.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
TMO Dating Alert: SALTROCK IS NOW SINGLE Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
See? SEE?? That's been there all night and not one offer of a date, never mind a shag!
It's official. I am unloved. Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by saltrock: See? SEE?? That's been there all night and not one offer of a date, never mind a shag!
It's official. I am unloved.
Sorry you got the wrong idea, saltrock.
As we speak, the forum gods are staging an elaborate tournament featuring an odd mix of disciplines including jousting, gymnastics, fire-breathing and table tennis. Why do these athletes of love put themselves through this unholy trauma of physical and menthol strength?
WHY? Because the winner (the last surviving TMOite) will get the chance to put forward the prized offer of a date that you so strongly desire.
Do not rush them, saltrock. You must wait. These people need time to fight their battles. A winner shall come forth in time. You can be assured of that. Posted by Uber Trick (Member # 456) on :
hey saltrock, sorry to hear about you and your fella Ringo may well be up for a shag though, although you might have to wait til his ear gets better. In the mean time you could always try asking Thorn Davis. Hope this helps! Posted by saltrock (Member # 622) on :
quote:Originally posted by Uber Trick: hey saltrock, sorry to hear about you and your fella Ringo may well be up for a shag though, although you might have to wait til his ear gets better. In the mean time you could always try asking Thorn Davis. Hope this helps!
Hmmm, not quite so keen on the Thorn thing, but Ringo might be a bit of a goer.
KERCHING! THOUGHT! He will be off balance at the moment due to the ear thing so I could probably take him down quite easily and get him whilst he's too weak to fight back. Yay! Enforced shagamuffining!
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by saltrock: Enforced shagamuffining!
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
![[Confused]](confused.gif)
I'll add an extra 30 mins.![[Mad]](mad.gif)
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
