So it's that time of year again. And even a thread of the subject of Big Brother has to be better another fucking zombie thread.
This year's twist was putting a non-celeb in the house and giving her the task of trying to convince the real celebrities that she was a pop star. Yesterday, she succeeded and the truth has now been revealed to the housemates.
Here's a list of the housemates:
Pete Burns - a man with a lady's faece Dennis Rodman - a tall blacke man Jodie Marsh - boobs and tears George Galloway - anti-war man Preston [somebody] - an Ordinary Boy Michael Barrymore - depressing ex-sleb, aside from hitler impression Maggott - off of Goldie Looking Chain Rula Lenska - 70s actress Fariah [somebody] - i don't know who Traci [somebody] - off of Baywatch...? Chantelle [somebody] - the fake sleb
Has anyone watched any of this? Say something about it, please. You can start below here: Posted by Physic (Member # 195) on :
Caught a glimpse of this the other night, Faria is Faria Alam, a nobody who shagged the then head of the FA, Mark Palios, and then Sven Goran Eriksson, and then sold the details to the press. So basically she's a 2-bit nobody with no taste, class or discretion, pretty much the standard choice for BB it seems.
The short bit I saw it seemed that Pete Burns and Michael Barrymore had taken an instant dislike to each other. Despite the potential of comedy arguing between a couple of has-beens I doubt I'll watch it though, the whole idea has been so done to death it's hard to see what can happen that hasn't happened at least once previously really.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
I have to say I did enjoy Chantelle's Goodyesque conversation with Dennis.
"So do you play basketball?"
"Yeah"
"Are you any good?"
"They tell me I am"
"It's sorta like netball, isn't it?"
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
There was a great bit last night where Chantelle emerged from the Diary Room, having been declared 'officially a celebrity' by Big Brother (in sneering, sarcastic mode). She was greeted by her delighted 'fellow celebrities' in scenes that reminded this viewer of the horrifying "One of us! One of us!" climax of Tod Browning's classic Freaks (1932).
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: Tod Browning's classic Freaks (1932).
LOL - Probably the first film to offer the tagline "Can a full grown woman truly love a MIDGET?" but certainly not the last.
Posted by London (Member # 29) on :
I wonder if that zombie game ever breaks?
Posted by Vogon Poetess (Member # 164) on :
I refuse to acknowledge "Big Brother" and its so-called celebrities (only two of which I have ever heard of).
Why are we not instead talking of the great FA Cup action over the weekend?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
I saw the last five minutes of Luton holding Man United to a goalless draw. For one moment, one tiny, infintesimable fraction of I second I almost stopped loathing football. Partly because the Luton players were quite so pretty; all young and overjoyed looking.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
Isn't it an annual requirement for one football game to feature the "minnows become giant killers" story? The giants then blunder off and continue winning everything in the normal fashion, while the minnows simply lose their next game and go back to doing whatever they did before - being plumbers or car wash attendants or something.
I'm fairly sure that's the format anyway.
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
burton. luton played liverpool.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Same thing. Team I had never heard of versus team I reserve special loathing for. Easily confused...
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
And for those that are interested here is the next round draw, which is of far more importance than a dull resurrection of has-beens and never quite weres for voyeuristic masterbation.
Stoke City/Tamworth v Barnsley/Walsall
Cheltenham Town/Chester City v Newcastle United
Coventry v Nuneaton Borough/Middlesbrough
West Brom/Reading v Torquay/Birmingham
Portsmouth v Liverpool
Leicester v Southampton
Bolton v Arsenal
Aston Villa v Port Vale
Brentford v Sunderland
Manchester City v Wigan/Leeds
Millwall/Everton v Chelsea
Preston v Crystal Palace
West Ham v Blackburn
Colchester v Derby
Charlton v Leyton Orient
Wolves v Burton/Manchester United
Posted by doc d (Member # 781) on :
west jam vs blackeye rovers? oof.
colchester? we're out next round then....
Posted by Niffer (Member # 266) on :
Charlton v Teh Orient - and I'm in sodding Moscow
Chances of finding anywhere showing that one anre nil-nil at full time.
Bugger.
Posted by Fionnula the Cooler (Member # 453) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: I saw the last five minutes of Luton holding Man United to a goalless draw. For one moment, one tiny, infintesimable fraction of I second I almost stopped loathing football. Partly because the Luton players were quite so pretty; all young and overjoyed looking.
The same thing happened to me when I saw the Liverpool game! I mean, I always enjoy when Liverpool games are on TV, but that's nothing to do with the football and everything to do with Steven Gerrard's thighs. This time, though, the football itself was almost squeal-inducingly thrilling. Afterwards I felt ashamed.
Posted by Waynster (Member # 56) on :
quote:Originally posted by doc d: west jam vs blackeye rovers? oof.
We did the Rovers first game of the season at the Boleyn ground, so if our Teddy's back I think we could be looking at the 5th round come February.
Posted by Kira (Member # 826) on :
Does anyone know what the final score was for the Luton v's Liverpool match?
I saw the first half and thought Luton played brilliantly... when we left it was Luton 2 - Liverpool 1.
I was hoping they managed to hold Liverpool off for a win but never found out the end result?
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
Liverpool won by some.
I helped.
Posted by Kira (Member # 826) on :
Oh thats a shame, I love a bit of giant killing...
quote:Originally posted by Fionnula the Cooler: This time, though, the football itself was almost squeal-inducingly thrilling. Afterwards I felt ashamed.
Ringo was in the bathroom shaving and heard me squealing after both Luton goals. He came back with a very bemused expression to find me huddled under the duvet staring intently at the last five minutes of the first half. Then he made me switch it off*
*not really true, we were going out to dinner but I could easily have watched the second half.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
I will NOT have my thread taken over by football chate!
I had to watch supid Ghostbusters at someone's stupid birthday party, and thus had to rely on a mate texting me updates. And then get up at 5 am, or whenever it is on Sunday that they insist on showing Match of the Day, in order to witness this goalfest. Have you heard about the punter who had £200 at 125-1 on Alonso scoring a goal from his own half, after seeing him try something similar last season?
My parents are very happy Leicester City fans this morning, something that doesn't happen very often.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
In the grand scheme of shit things to talk about football actually beats Celebrity Big Brother.
I'm not arsed about the zombies. The zombie chate is quite cute. I think I might adopt a zombie one day. I imagine they'd make an interesting conversation point at dinner...
[ 09.01.2006, 09:55: Message edited by: Louche ]
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
Did anyone watch 'Invasion' on Channel 4 last night before, during or after CBB ?
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
I don't know - after Dark Skies and Taken and all those other lacklustre efforts, I couldn't really be bothered with another tv aliensfest.
When will people realise: there are no aliens. We're all on our tod in this vast, terrifying, empty universe.
[ 09.01.2006, 10:22: Message edited by: ben ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: In the grand scheme of shit things to talk about football actually beats Celebrity Big Brother.
Not on my threads!
On the subject of Reality TV, I also caught a few minutes of Shipwrecked yesterday. The idea is that two teams (or tribes) are left on two separate desert islands. Each week a new person arrives and is given a choice of which island to live on. At the end of the series, the island with the most inhabitants wins. So there's a reason for the contestants to make their island a better place to live. There's almost a purpose to it.
Personally I think someone (EndEmAll?) should create a crossover of Shipwrecked and Scrapheap challenge. The same two islands are filled with scrap metal, old tractors, washing machines, etc. Contestants on both teams have to build a weapon with the limited resources available. They then use said weapon to try and obliterate the inhabitants of the opposing island.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: I don't know - after Dark Skies and Taken and all those other lacklustre efforts, I couldn't really be bothered with another tv aliensfest.
I think Snorton watched all these - he thought they said illegal alien and signed up.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Sorry, that was well shit.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
Unless anyone can provide contradictory evidence 'by close of play today', I think that will go down as being your worst ever post Thorn.
I feel dirty just for having unwittingly given you the 'feed'.
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
quote:Originally posted by Darryn.R: Did anyone watch 'Invasion' on Channel 4 last night before, during or after CBB ?
Mrs Dang reckoned this was very good, but I didn't see it myself.
The one I do fancy seeing is Life On Mars about the nowadays copper who goes back to the 70s, or something. The reviews are saying it's very good, but it starts tonight and I'm back in France now. Fortunately the BBC Freeview channels mean that pretty much everything is repeated pretty much all the time, so I expect to see it sometime at the weekend.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Freeview ... pretty much everything is repeated pretty much all the time
*rueful lol* Yeah that's about the size of it.
Posted by Good Fairy (Member # 479) on :
quote:Originally posted by Darryn.R: Did anyone watch 'Invasion' on Channel 4 last night before, during or after CBB ?
I want to like it, but it's looking like a really drawn out version of the bodysnatchers. "Lost", got very old very quick. Maybe I'm just getting impatient?
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by ben: Unless anyone can provide contradictory evidence 'by close of play today', I think that will go down as being your worst ever post Thorn.
I reckon there are a few other contenders, but the one that sprang immediately to my mind was the regrettable...
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: I thought yesterday's interview went quite badly: notably when they were talking about a project to combat HIV amongst Africans, and I suggested calling it spAIDS.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: I reckon there are a few other contenders, but the one that sprang immediately to my mind was the regrettable...
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: I thought yesterday's interview went quite badly: notably when they were talking about a project to combat HIV amongst Africans, and I suggested calling it spAIDS.
That's sick, shocking and therefore funny in a very black (Mask) way. The Aliens joke didn't even really make sense. Basically, you're just digging up better moments now in an attempt to detract from the utterly dire post above, aren't you?
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Well what else could I do?
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
"Saddam Hussein greeted me with a handshake, which, again to my surprise, is surprisingly soft considering how many people that hand had dispatched, allegedly."
"Sir, I salute your courage, your strength your indefatigability! And I want you to know that we are with you until victory! Until Jerusalem!"
"[Fidel Castro] is not a dictator, not at all."
"The disappearance of the Soviet Union is the biggest catastrophe of my life"
"I'm an MP"
[ 09.01.2006, 18:19: Message edited by: vikram ]
Posted by omikin (Member # 37) on :
george galloway in the middle of his now-legendary ted rogers impersonation.
Posted by vikram (Member # 98) on :
can someone do a phoo of barrymore drowning galloway in the pool?
pretty please?
Posted by Ganesh (Member # 685) on :
quote:Originally posted by Louche: In the grand scheme of shit things to talk about football actually beats Celebrity Big Brother.
Who do y'all reckon will be up for nomination, then? Jodie? Faria? One of the token Yanks?
Ok so on Barbelith its very popular? whats your point?
[ 09.01.2006, 14:36: Message edited by: Kira ]
Posted by Dr. Benway (Member # 20) on :
I think you'll find that Barbelith is actually the most important place on the internet.
Posted by Kira (Member # 826) on :
obviously i missed that memo...
Posted by Dr. Benway (Member # 20) on :
I'm surprised that you've got the balls to have an opinion on anything then.
Posted by Bone (Member # 863) on :
quote:Originally posted by omikin:
george galloway in the middle of his now-legendary ted rogers impersonation.
Nice,
But as an elected Member of Parliament, shouldn't he really have better things to be doing with his time (like working for his constituents) than hanging out with the likes of Barrymore, Rodman, Alam etc?
Posted by Ganesh (Member # 685) on :
quote:Originally posted by Kira: [QUOTE]Ok so on Barbelith its very popular? whats your point?
Just that there's some discussion of it over there which might appeal to some of you. As ever, I find myself peculiarly hooked.
Posted by omikin (Member # 37) on :
quote:Originally posted by Bone:
quote:Originally posted by omikin:
george galloway in the middle of his now-legendary ted rogers impersonation.
Nice,
But as an elected Member of Parliament, shouldn't he really have better things to be doing with his time (like working for his constituents) than hanging out with the likes of Barrymore, Rodman, Alam etc?
oof! that's totally shot down my whole argument. in flames!
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Hey Ganesh. What's Barbelith like these days? Do your highbrow Big Brother threads also get tainted by inane football chate? Does the forum regularly die, as members would rather pretend to kill zombies than contribute? Are you taking new members?
Posted by London (Member # 29) on :
I'm glad Misc hates the zombie thread too.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Are you taking new members?
I think kyou have to audition for it - prove your worth and so on. So: unlucky.
Posted by Louche (Member # 450) on :
You have to jump through seven fiery hoops then recite all of Tennyson's maud whhilst doing the Highland Fling. I thought about registering but it takes me a good ten minutes to consider what I might want for a new username and the prospect of justifying my existance was so wearing I went back to reading Handbag news instead.
And c'mon, no-one can possibly fail to be gripped by the bloody and desperate finale to the Urban dead threads, can they? The despair emanating from the Games forum is energising my soul.
Posted by ben (Member # 13) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: kyou
Think the correct, non-gendered term is zou. Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
edit: worse than Thorn's post yesterday.
[ 10.01.2006, 05:18: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
OK then, lets try and pull ourselves out of the doldrums and zombies (though I myself am quite enjoying UD) and start posting more on a wider variety of subjects yes ?
So far as this years Big Brother goes:
It's too car crash television for me. Barrymore is too tragic, a massive emotional cripple looking for the safe warmth of the (spot)light(s) like a cold lizard on a rock, Galloway just a massive walking c.untsack you would willingly pay to punch, Jodie Marsh makes me cry, the way she was yesterday with Rodman (hasbeenandneverwillbeagain) on the countertop laying back with legs akimbo while Big Daddy D thrust back and forth against her mildewed mimsy grunting nonsense, then sitting up and looking so, just, so disgusted with herself, as though just for a moment she had seen herself through our eyes and felt the pity. (On Channel 4 this morning bearded comic Dave Gorman said "her nose look like it's caught a Frisbee" which made me LOL)
Preston, Oh Preston, I have both your albums, I liked you, why have you forsaken Ska for Skank and taken up with (and I can't believe I'm actually going to say this) Paris Hilton's uglier look-alike Chantelle ?? She boggles my mind and turns my stomach that one..
Rula ?? I thought you were dead, you certainly look it. How is Dennis Waterman these days ?
Pete Burns, Burns victim more like, what has he done to his face ? That's some fucked up shizzle right there that is.
Faria looks like a dirty waitress, the sort of woman who'd suck you dry while you stand picking bits of dried rice out of her hair, maybe that's what gets Sven off but it doesn't work for me.
Traci do you have a personality with you or did you forget to pack it ?
I hope this spells the end of this sort of low quality TV and that newer odder shows from Endemol here in Holland make it onto your screens. My current fave show here (for which I wait with baited breath) is one where five former prostitutes from the Dam's red light are given the chance to open and run a restaurant on the Overtoom and three of them look like men, I'm hoping that's the twist in the tail..
Err, Go Maggot.
[ 10.01.2006, 05:29: Message edited by: Darryn.R ]
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
Misc, I'll talk about SlebBB, as it is repellently fascinating, at least a good deal more so than Futba.
Celebrity, eh. Who ARE these people? Someone famous solely for shagging someone else mainly famous for shagging Ulrika Johnnson, someone else 'famous' for getting her baps out and having a tabloid-fuelled, and created, argument with another bap-displayer... It's all so desperate. The famous for being famous circle of madness was well demonstrated by Chantelle being voted by the other housemates as more famous than the two band boys, even though she's a 'nobody'. But not any more, because she's on Big Brother.
And most of the housemates are less famous than previous BB contestants such as Jade Goody or Nadia. Maybe that will be the next up-the-concept's-fundament programme - ex-winners and 'stars' of BB all together in the 'celeb' house. *head explodes*
Anyway, this lot of 'celebs' are surely the most loathsome and childish and attention-seeking collection so far. I could scarcely watch the one-eye on-the-camera 'flirting' between Jodie Slag and anyone else that would pay her attention. *barf*
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
For those of you slagging off Dennis Rodman for being a has-been - let's not forget he starred in shit martial arts film Double Team with Jean-Claude Van Damme. Starring in this ridiculed action flick with a past his best nightclub bouncer is still a greater level of success than most people on here will ever achieve. I want you all to think about that for a second.
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
I do agree that Double Team is a classic movie of it ouvre, but that was the last thing Dennis Keith Rodman did that was any good.
Mind, I bet we see "Inked" on the telly before the year is out, his first reality program that spotlights the touching personal stories and saucy confessions of patrons, along with the sizzling celebrity exploits and the dramatic mounting tensions amongst the store's colorful staff, as the worlds first tattoo parlor inside a major Las Vegas casino resort opens its doors to the public.
[ 10.01.2006, 05:45: Message edited by: Darryn.R ]
Posted by Dr. Benway (Member # 20) on :
I can't bare this kind of thing. I remember curling up with herbs a couple of years back to watch a late night dispatche of Imma celeb, get me outta here, and that was just about the limit. It's straight out porn without giving you anything to wank over. Mutually exploitational, a soul reaping tool for ad man who fell from grace. I watched a couple of minutes the other night - Barrymore and Burns were staring at each other. That was it. Excellent. The show seems like a trial, like this is a form of punishment for their desire to be a celebrity in the first place. A Willy Wonka Experience, and armed with their golden tickets, we grimly watch as one by one, the contestents reveal their weaknesses and vices, so only the chaste remain. It's a highly moral exercise, underpinned by our latent hatred of anybody who has made money of our of incurable desire to feed the egoists. Yuck. Nobody can really win this one.
I once 'met' Pete Burns, and he is amazing to look at. Like a beautiful alien.
[ 10.01.2006, 05:46: Message edited by: Dr. Benway ]
Posted by Dr. Benway (Member # 20) on :
I know that's a mind-blowingly obvious and facile observation, but it's one that I can't get past.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
I'd love to get onto celeb big brother, or - to a lesser extent - the actual big brother. I think it would be incredible. The opportunities are endless. You could begin with something basic, like wanking into the communal milk and then just take it from there. Celebrity terrorism. That non-celeb Chantelle girl can wreak havoc, if she chooses, and it will all be documented and broadcast to the nation. What a waste.
Posted by kovacs (Member # 28) on :
Anyone who watches this show, and particularly anyone who writes about it, is in a very real way part of it -- part of the whole culture and experience of Celebrity Big Brother. As audience and commentators, you are integral to this monstrosity. Big Brother needs its viewers and this daily chorus of commentary to be what it is, as much as a circus or a gladiatorial battle doesn't fully exist without an auditorium of spectators.
That sounds rather glib and obvious as I write it, but I'm surprised people who seem to hate this spectacle don't remove themselves from it.
Posted by kovacs (Member # 28) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dr. Benway: I know that's a mind-blowingly obvious and facile observation, but it's one that I can't get past.
Funny -- that's how I felt about my last post. Perhaps Big Brother has that effect. Any criticisms you can come up with are just bug-eyed staringly obvious, and so somehow diluted. Perhaps the phenomenon is obviously fully-aware of all these criticisms, and carries on all the same.
Posted by Darryn.R (Member # 1) on :
I always liked the idea of trying to tunnel out using a spoon, just to see how deep you could get the hole, how long it would take them to evict you, would they even try.
Problem is, I think if you have any spark of true anarchy in your soul they wouldn't let you in.
The rules seem to state that you have to be bland.
Posted by kovacs (Member # 28) on :
I think I'd be very watchable on Big Brother, though. I wouldn't want the world to see exactly how much effort it takes to make myself physically presentable every day, but I think I would provide telly-value-for-money.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by kovacs: I think I would provide telly-value-for-money.
Why? Because you could provoke interesting conversations between the housemates? That might be tv4m for us, but would the wider Big Brother audience care? Perhaps I'm expecting too little from the general public but judging by Davina's commentary, all they seem to want is gossip and frottage.
I heard George G say something along the lines of:
quote:I thought people might ask me questions. Something like 'What's that Tony Blair like then?' But they haven't. Chantelle asked me if I work in 'the big room with the green seats'."
Posted by kovacs (Member # 28) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Why? Because you could provoke interesting conversations between the housemates? That might be tv4m for us, but would the wider Big Brother audience care?
If I was on BB I think there'd be an interesting dynamic between my obvious private hatred for every other housemate, and my insincerely chameleonic attempts to pal up with each of them, modifying my own behaviour to suit them.
I think the only way to get by would be to try to be liked by everyone -- it would be hellish enough without having to avoid or blank people in that close environment -- but internally I would be crafting poisonous assessments of the others to be unleashed in the diary room.
I would be one of the older and uglier housemates, but I can't think of anyone on a non-celeb BB who I'd regard as more intelligent than me. So I'd bring that "USP" to the "table".
Posted by herbs (Member # 101) on :
quote:Originally posted by Dr. Benway: I can't bare this kind of thing. I remember curling up with herbs a couple of years back to watch a late night dispatche of Imma celeb, get me outta here, and that was just about the limit. ... plus insightful comment
Dr B, wasn't the most soul-destroying part of that ImmaSleb viewing the test messages scrolling across the bottom of the screen, such as Chelsee - I luv u wil u mary me? Such romance.
Also, your comment re trial, Willy Wonka was, to me, one of those insights only obvious once pointed out. In other words = clever.
Posted by Toilet Duck (Member # 801) on :
Misc - is your thread title an attempt at keyword spamming?
On an altogether unrelated note, I'm going to see our village panto this weekend. It's called "I'm Cinderella - Get Me Out of Here!".
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
I just saw three of the most damaged people in the country having an indecipherably stupid argument in a kitchen. It was quite stimulating.
Posted by Ganesh (Member # 685) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Hey Ganesh. What's Barbelith like these days? Do your highbrow Big Brother threads also get tainted by inane football chate? Does the forum regularly die, as members would rather pretend to kill zombies than contribute? Are you taking new members?
Yes, no, I dunno.
Not sure about the new members thing. It had become relatively free 'n' easy, but the trolls they are a-returnin'...
Posted by Bone (Member # 863) on :
quote:Originally posted by omikin:
quote:Originally posted by Bone:
quote:Originally posted by omikin:
george galloway in the middle of his now-legendary ted rogers impersonation.
Nice,
But as an elected Member of Parliament, shouldn't he really have better things to be doing with his time (like working for his constituents) than hanging out with the likes of Barrymore, Rodman, Alam etc?
oof! that's totally shot down my whole argument. in flames!
Om sir,
My post was meant to fulfil 2 different functions.
1. To Let you know how much you're 3.2.1. style comment amused me
and as a separate point
2. To raise my eyebrows at an MP deciding to spend his time wanking about on a show like this.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
quote:Originally posted by Toilet Duck: Misc - is your thread title an attempt at keyword spamming?
Yes. I've seen this shit work wonders on eBay. Can I tell you a secret? I make my money on the postage.
Posted by Toilet Duck (Member # 801) on :
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Can I tell you a secret? I make my money on the postage.
I'll tell you a secret too: so do I.
Posted by jonesy999 (Member # 5) on :
Did anyone watch this crazy shit last night? I haven't seen much of Celebrity Big Brother this time around but I couldn't tear my eyes from last night's horror show, even though I tried to gnaw through my retinas in order to escape. Christ! I mean, fucking hell! George Galloway puffing away at his cigar like he was actually sucking from Satan's cock - which in fact, he was; gulping down a thick-shake of the Dark Lord's seed as the Devil perched beside him presiding over the pandemonium his lilo-lipped whispers had orchestrated. Pete Burns, swollen with concentrated venom and bile, a cackling, smoking, scouse demon, flitting across the house like a devil spider, his fangs gnashing beneath their bloated poison sacks as he casts threads of silken bitch to entwine and possess the other inmates: a whisper here, the caress of a claw there, before retreating to the edge of the web to lick his lip-sacks and view the destruction through hooded, yellow eyes. Michael Barrymore lumbering around like a gangling stroke victim Yoda - occasionally demonstrating his knowledge of the force by using Gordon Kaye's midichlorians to transform into a talking French mime artist who sells onions to no one. Evil, evil, evil creatures squabbling and shrieking while the 'good' sit and watch in horror, powerless to intervene: Maggot, poor, frightened Maggot, clinging to 'the gift of medallion' and cowering as Pete runs a single talon along the thigh of his caged beast, the signal to release his slam-dunking Kraken. It will hit your face, it will hit your face, the Rod Man will hit your face - but not here, not in this house, never here, afterwards, soon, when it gets you away from the cameras; it isn't going to give a shit then. Poor pretty banker boy shouting wanker from the stalls as Chantelle fights the good fight using moves from the Hong Kong book of Catherine Tate Kung Fu. Madness. It is absolute madness. I have never seen anything like it. Does the house really do this to people? Is it that fucking bonkers to be trapped in there? Jesus!
[ 30.01.2006, 12:50: Message edited by: jonesy999 ]
Posted by Benny the Ball (Member # 694) on :
fucking hell, jonesy, you almost, ALMOST, made me want to watch it then...
Posted by not... (Member # 25) on :
lol. Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
CBB rocked last night. George is a bad man.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
The racism debacle last week was good fun.
quote: [Faria] The 39-year-old, famous for her fling with England coach Sven-Goran Eriksson, broke down in tears after her comments caused outrage in the Big Brother house.
Bangladeshi-born Faria told African-American Dennis and Traci: “Do you think they’ll ever let a black or Asian girl or guy win this thing?
“Are you out of your tree? Think about it, darling. Never. Remember that.
“This country? Oh please! Don’t even get me going on that. They would never, they’d be up in f***ing arms.”
Former Baywatch actress Traci, 38, who is of mixed African-American, Italian, and Native American heritage, recounted the conversation to the rest of the group, asking for their opinion.
“For me, I thought it was going to be fair and square ... I thought I did have a chance to win,” she said.
“But according to Faria and Dennis, because I’m female and I’m American and my skin is brown, I don’t stand a chance.”
Faria heard what was going on and attempted to clarify what had been said but ended up offending her fellow housemates.
An angry Respect MP George Galloway stated: “The idea that people who watch this show are bigots is preposterous.
“Most of the people who’ve won have been from minorities of one kind or another.”
Actress Rula Lenska added: “The idea of anybody putting that into their vote in the house is an insult.”
The celebrities were left with the impression that Dennis had made the comments, despite the fact that Faria had sparked the discussion.
When Dennis, 44, found out, he confronted Traci and Faria in the bedroom, saying: “You’re trying to point the finger at me.”
Faria later accepted responsibility.
After all this had finally blown over and the housemates were sitting together in the living room, Rula said in conversation
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
![[Mad]](mad.gif)
![[Cool]](cool.gif)