In that shop he has bibliotherapists. People come in or phone up and say, "Hi, I've got such-and-such a problem. What books should I be reading?"
What does TMO think? Is this dreadful old wank? Or spiffing?
I reckon we've critted and recommended enough stuff on TMO to have a crack at this ourselves. We could do books. Movies. Music.
Darryn? Could TMO go in to business?
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Oh, they charge £35 a pop according to the website that I didn't look at properly.
[ 25.09.2008, 05:12: Message edited by: Black Mask ]
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: We could do books. Movies. Music.
That would only work if everyone who rang up had a problem that could be solved by reading The New York Trilogy and/or Hangover Square.
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
On the whole though, the idea strikes me as being equally as absurd as those books called things like 1001 Songs to put on your ipod. It's just there so that people feel like they're getting books right. I don't doubt that books can help you deal with difficult times, anxieties and so forth, but to outsource the decision making process to someone else and pay £35 for it is a bit mad.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
Yeah. That could be our fall-back position. But, we could mix it up a bit. There's always The Killer Inside Me.
Why don't we try one?
Dear TMO,
I'm a twenty-something media-**** from Hoxton. I think I know it all but actually I'm a vapid arsehole. I spend all my time schmoozing, getting high, fucking bitches. My life rocks. What should I be reading? Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Speaking of which, Black Mask I read King Blood on your recommendation while I was on holiday and it was fucking shit. For a Jim Thompson novel it seemed completely devoid of tension, rambled around all over the place with a clear sense that he was making it up as he went along and then fizzled out with a nothing ending. By far the worst book of his, even the grisly set-piece three-quarters of the way through turns out to be an illusion.
Posted by Abby (Member # 582) on :
Is this one of Dang's inventions? Maybe there could be a bibliotherapy van which drives around to your office once a week?
Speaking of inventions I have recently invented a new design of microscope stage working with an engineer from company X. And one of my colleagues has just told us that company X has offered them a new kind of microscope stage which they are currently developing! ORLY?
Not so smart of them to try and flog it to the person who works in the same room as me.
I am writing a stern email…
[ 25.09.2008, 05:12: Message edited by: Abby ]
Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: Dear TMO,
I'm a twenty-something media-**** from Hoxton. I think I know it all but actually I'm a vapid arsehole. I spend all my time schmoozing, getting high, fucking bitches. My life rocks. What should I be reading?
Dear Vikram,
Why don't you have a go at reading Vile Bodies by Evelyn Waugh? It's quite short and sparsely written so it won't be too taxing on your atrophied brain, but as the novel progresses you will find that its excoriating dissection of inter-war twenty-somethings demonstrates there is nothing new or remarkable about your hedonistic lifestyle. If you possess any insight or self-awareness at all you might find yourself backing away in horror as a novel written long before you were born mercilessly skewers the myopia and absurdity of a life you thought was your own.
That will be £35, please, and £7.99 for the paperback.
Regards
Alun Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
Also, the ending of A Handful of Dust should put you off going on exciting travelling adventures for the rest of your life.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Speaking of which, Black Mask I read King Blood on your recommendation while I was on holiday and it was fucking shit.
Um... I think I said it was fucking shit, didn't I? When I read it it was fucking shit and I can't imagine it's improved with age. I seem to remember saying something along the lines of how he'd moved from weird to porn with King Blood, and how it rambled around all over the place with a clear sense that he was making it up as he went along and then fizzled out with a nothing ending. I don't know, maybe I said it was great. I can't be expected to know, remember or care about every damn thing I say, do or write.
Jesus!
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: Dear Vikram,
lollus
Here's another one. Everyone feel free to join in. You *****.
Hi TMO,
I'm a forty year old wage slave who is resigned to the fact that the revolution just isn't going to happen and I'm never going to get to throw a screaming Margaret Thatcher from the burning tower of Big Ben. To blot out this misery I delve into a fantasy world of comic books, stupid movies and alcohol. What should I be reading to convince me that I'm an immortal superhuman and not a washed-up fucking never-was? Posted by Thorn Davis (Member # 65) on :
I think you said something like "if you can get hold of it, you should read King Blood. It's a completely irredeemable mess of racism and violence against women". I don't know. Somewhere along the line that sounded like an endorsement.
Posted by Black Mask (Member # 185) on :
quote:Originally posted by Thorn Davis: I think you said something like "if you can get hold of it, you should read King Blood. It's a completely irredeemable mess of racism and violence against women". I don't know. Somewhere along the line that sounded like an endorsement.
Ah, my bad. Apologies.
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Dearest TMO Bibliotherapists,
I keep falling asleep on the train to work while I'm trying to read When the Sleeper Wakes by HG Wells. It's not that I find it boring, I think I'm just over-tired. Could you recommend a book that will keep me awake?
It needs to be a small book that fits alongside the wallet and other junk in my bag.
The book's contents mustn't be so arousing as to cause me trouser embarrassment on public transport.
Perhaps it could be a recently written novel of some kind, as I've been reading old stuff for as long as I can remember.
It should be written in British English, and not American as I get enough of that on the Internet thank you very much.
The plot should not be based around horses, large dogs, any other long-faced mammal, or anything at all to do with these unpleasant creatures.
My favourite colours are burgundy and cream and I'd like a book whose cover would fit in with my decor. Serif fonts would be ideal, if possible.
If it comes with a free bookmark - great!
I look forward to hearing from you.
Lots of love, Misc
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
I demand my money back. This service is terrible.
FYI: I may be a mystery shopper!
[ 25.09.2008, 06:35: Message edited by: MiscellaneousFiles ]
Posted by dang65 (Member # 102) on :
Misc, I just read this:
It doesn't really fit any of your other criteria, but it is the right colour, which, reading between the lines, looks to be the most important thing.
[It was actually quite readable, though it did feel a bit like a feature length episode of QI.]
You can have a discount on that recommendation, due to it being so lame.
[ 25.09.2008, 06:40: Message edited by: dang65 ]
Posted by MiscellaneousFiles (Member # 60) on :
Hmm, I think there might be some mention of horses in that book, but yes, the colour scheme is most appealing!
Perhaps I'll go down to Waterstones on my lunch break, ask to speak to the manager, and suggest that they start ordering books by cover colour rather than author name. To illustrate the concept, I'll take some sheets of A3 with "TEAL", "OCHRE", "LIME", etc printed in giant Comic Sans characters in the appropriate colours.
Of course the top level categorization should be HORSEY / NON-HORSEY. These sections could be on different floors, to avoid confusion.
