Do you want a fight ? of course you do.
Studying the noble art of giving someone a good kicking is a must for all Ladz.
Getting into a fight should be easy, but these days, getting into a good punch up can be hard.
When looking to start a fight FLM recommends finding a equal size group of other Ladz and then shouting insults at them and if possible their birds.
Good insults for starting a fight are:
How to start a fight
- Your bird is ugly.
- You are a poof.
- I bet you drink shandy.
- Your football team are not very good at all.
- What are you lookin' at ?
- Do you want a fight ?
After the insults and goading are over, you'll need to start the rumble off. A good way to do this is by throwing stuff.
Traffic cones, chairs, bricks, coppers, students all make good missiles, whatever you can get your hands on will do though..
If you can take one of them out with a flying traffic cone it'll be much easier to begin the kickin'.
Kicks should be delivered with no due care and attention and with your arms flailing like windmills.Lurching your feet forward in the general direction of your foe is a good starter. if your are lucky enough to make contact and bring one of them down the kicks should then be centered on the knackers, the head and the arse.
Punches should be delivered only in close range combat and are simple yet effective. First make a fist by screwing your hand up into a ball. Then pull back your arm and start moving it back and forward attempting to making contact with your foes fleshy parts whilst avoiding your own.
If all else fails use your head to nut your foe. Heads are hard and cause maximum damage if brought into contact with the nose, eyes or head. Another plus side to butting is that banging your head hard kills off brain cells so the harder you nut him the more stupid he will become - Brilliant !
After the fight it's off to the pub for some serious drinking - A good reward for a well 'ard ruck.
FLM's expert fight thug: Happy 'Slapem' Hodgkins.