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Honestly, one deranged crackpot mounting a laughably stupid lawsuit is the best you could do? You may as well go "Yeah, you think PCs are prone to software issues, drivers conflicting and poor optimisation? Well what about irons!" and link to that story about the dude who took a manufacturer to court because he tried to iron his clothes while wearing them.
I don't know. That whole consoles = stupid thing really bewilders me. What's supposed to be an 'intelligent' PC game anyway? Is Gears of War really less stupid on the PC because you play it with a keyboard and mouse? Is BioShock thicko on the Xbox and an innovative critique of capitalist objectivism on the PC because the resolution goes up higher? What does stupid even mean in the context you've quoted? What are the intelligent PC games? Fucking... Hellgate: London? Usually people claim console games are thicko if they've had endless amounts of inventory management taken out or are lacking a dizzying array of keyboard shortcuts as though intelligence is somehow demonstrated through the ability to remember that control+c does the same thing as clicking on this guy here and then this guy over here.
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I've signed up for a Japanese PSN account so now I can download japanese stuff for my PS3. Like the Japan-only demo of Gran Turismo 5 Prologue. It seems a bit weird, getting a demo of what is actually a bigger demo of a final game that's probably not going to be released for another year or so, but still. GT5. I'm tumescent.
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I've been playing Team Fortress 2 all day and I'm totally shit at it but it's totally ace and you all totally have to come and play against me TONIGHT.
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Team Fortress 2 was, like, my life last week. Best things about TF2:
laying a few crafty mines on the ceiling of a checkpoint, hiding round the corner, waiting for two or three oblivious enemy scouts to arrive, then detonating the mines, obliterating all enemies simultaneously.
while a medic, permanently attaching yourself to the best member of your team ostensibly to provide perpetual healing but in fact to rack up a points-share of all his kills.
while a spy, disguising yourself as one of your opponents and infiltrating their team, only to sneak up behind one of them and literally STAB THEM IN THE BACK WITH A KNIFE KILLING THEM INSTANTLY and run off before the ohmygodding witnesses shoot you dead.
Yesterday, I killed an unfortunate Korean gentleman by throwing an ammo box at his knees, which sent him stumbling backwards off a cliff.
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quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: I've got a Wii but I don't think I'll be buying this Galaxy game.
Well, you’ve made the right decision there Misc. I’ve just spent a few hours playing my sister’s copy of Super Mario Galaxy, and to be honest if I’d spent actual money on this fucking game I would be seriously considering killing myself. Through and through, playing this game is a dismal, miserable experience.
I suppose it’s churlish to complain that a Mario game takes place in the Mario universe, but like Disney and the Mars Corporation, there’s something distasteful about the deployment of the super-cutesy aesthetic in the service of gigantic corporate moneymaking. There’s nothing there in terms of artistic worth, as with something like (the film) Ratatouille, just smiling doe-eyed characters created by a mega-rich company with the aim of taking money from children. So I was off to a bad start given that Mario and his world have always made me feel a bit queasy.
Nonetheless, I thought I’d give it a go, seeing as it was a) being raved about as though Mario and the Wii were the greatest match since the internet and porn and b) I didn’t have to pay for it. But even for free I felt disappointed in it and even though I’m unemployed and have nothing to do but sit around the house staring at the walls and crying, the game still managed to feel like a massive waste of my time.
It’s not bad exactly, in the sense that it’s not buggy or glitched or unfinished, it’s just that… whilst playing it the word that kept floating back into my head was autistic. There’s a focus on completion and precision coupled with the simplistic smiling faces on your allies and straightforward frowns on your enemy that made me think that the game would be perfect for autistic kids or, I suppose, adults who had had their emotional development retarded in some way. Which is probably why it’s been such a hit in the gaming community. It hinges on that whole “Gotta catch ‘em all!” gameplay conceit, which relies on the gamer being compulsive obsessive enough to want to play the same level three times, once again with time limits, again in a race or with some other minor tweak just to get the next star. Perhaps this is normal for a Mario game? It’s hard for me to say because I haven’t played one since I was about eight, which probably accounted for some of my bewilderment at points in the game. At one point a talking bee said “These stones mean that sproutles can’t grow!”. Given that most plants in the game attempt to do you physical harm I couldn’t work out whether what he was telling me was good advice or bad. Maybe if I was a colossal nerd I would have known what the fuck a sproutle is in the world of Mario, but for five minutes I wandered round without progress as I tried to figure out the implications of his nonsense.
Another thing. A great deal of fuss has been made of the gravity and orbs that make up the levels of this game. Oh yeah, it’s great to be able to walk over the edge off a world and keep on going on the other side, except for the ones where by some arbitrary designation you fall off the edge. There’s nothing to help you distinguish between levels where you have to walk right round the other side of the plateau, and ones where this will result in your instant and unavoidable death.
Not that I had a particular problem with dying, mind, as it just represented a step towards a logical moment to turn off the Wii. Like Patience, it does a decent enough job of keeping you hooked, even if playing it isn’t actually fun. So I found it hard to turn off mid game, but the flip side was that every time I earned an extra life, my heart sank a little as it put further distance between me and the Game Over screen, which probably isn’t the way things are supposed to work.
I don’t mean to be mean, and it’s apparent that a lot of people are getting a great deal of pleasure from this game. It’s just that my over-riding impression is that to actually have fun playing it, there probably has to be something wrong with you.
A and I are also playing the Dynasty/Samurai Warriors game. It's called Warriors Orochi. They've combined the two games to make one. Much fun, pretty much like the rest of the games, but now you play three people. Fun fun fun.
Dynasty Warriors 6 comes out in February, hurray!
Teffers, if you're reading this, you and your girl would really like Warriors Orochi.
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quote:Originally posted by Fionnula the Cooler: That post is so wrong I'm beginning to think it must be some sort of Thorn Davis trick.
Well, if it helps, the overwhelming positive reaction to this game convinced me to plough on for another hour or so at which point I begn to appreciate the game as a piece of art. I was playing something called the sweetie galaxy, and had reached a point at which I kept dying and couldn't get past. The layout of the level meant that it was quite easy to earn two extra lives every now and again, so for every time I died, I earned about one and half extra lives. As I said before the game gets its hooks into you on some level, making it hard to turn it off, even if you're not having much fun. Much like, I imagine, a crack addict probably wouldn't claim to enjoy crack. So I was stuck in this 30 second loop, unable to die, unable to proceed and really hating every second when I realised the game had introduced me to the profound existential hell of an Italian plumber, unwilling to give up, unable to change his lot in life yet still trapped in a cycle of misery. So in that sense at least, I have to give it some credit.
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i got COD 4, which is alright. More COD really, nothing new. Running around with bullets flying everywhere, dying repeatedly, and trying to find the point where you trigger checkpoints. I like the bits where you're in buildings, using flashbangs and gunning people down at close range, but mostly it's just trying to find cover and shooting at undending streams of middle easterns.
More better is Ace Combat 6. Beautiful presentation, and satisfying gameplay. Swooping around in the sky, locking on, firing missiles. Each mission lasts around 40 minutes. You start off with lots of targets, finish with none. By the end of each mission, you've ticked off your list, and can bathe in the satisfaction that this brings. Lots of stats too. I've always had a soft spot for arcadey flight games. F/A-18 Interceptor on the Amiga, G-Loc, F-16 Falcon, F-29 Interceptor, Comanche, F22 Raptor. All of them just flying around, locking on and firing missiles. I still find it thrilling to be flying at over 1000 miles an hour, going through canyons, under bridges, between buildings, seemingly inches from firey death. And Ace Combat 6 makes it all so gorgeous, in eye gouging HD.
[ 14.12.2007, 05:30: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
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finished COD4 and Ace Combat, so I've been playing with my shiny new psp. Specifically, Crush and Metal Gear Solid Portable Ops. It's nice to play metal gear again, after having only played the first game on the playstation.
Also got an R4 card for the DS, and downloaded a shit load of games for that. Been playing some old SCUMM stuff and all the games I've wanted to try but not buy over the years.. cooking mama, dragon quest rocket slime, simcity ds, etc.
I also tried to play a game about sherlock holmes and the Cthulu Mythos on the PC, but vista wasn't having any of it.
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My Dad got CoD4 for christmas but discovered the next day that their PC is too crappy to play it. So now he's having to buy a whole new PC just to play that game. That's a pretty expensive christmas present.
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Got Guitar Hero 3. Did some online rocking out. The guitar is better than the one you get with Guitar Hero 3. More solider. The game overall feels harder than Guitar Hero 2. I was doing fine until Iron Maiden and Muse, which hurt me. Finally managed to co-op Freebird on Guitar Hero 2, which was a great experience.
Also borrowed Assassin's Creed. Started on that. Very attractive, definitely shows off the TV. Quite soothing gameplay, but it's starting to get a bit samey after having completed the first couple of levels. Mostly I like running around in the streets knocking people over, and also when you start climbing the walls and people say things like "God help him, he's gone completely mad'. I found Optimus Prime in the game last night, without even searching. Hopefully Desmond will get to punch Lucy at some point.
Started the new Sam and Max, but my hangover at the time prevented me from really getting into it - the bright colours were hurting my eyes and making me puke.
I also played some Mario Party, which was suprisingly fun. Same with the movie trivia game "scene it".
[ 14.01.2008, 05:40: Message edited by: Dr. Benway ]
Yeah, that was my experience of Assassin's Creed. It's incredibly light on gameplay, but there is something incredibly relaxing about the free running. I'm loathe to sell it now I've finished it just because dipping into for a sprint round Jerusalem is quite a pleasant way to unwind.
Finished Mass Effect, and the first thing I did was start again with a new character, hard faced racist bitch who's just going through the game bullying everyone and generally acting like a brat. Even though I tried to cover as many of the side missions as I could the first time out, it's still making me laugh out loud to see things play out in new ways. You don't get to be outright evil. You're still the hero, just one that acts like a complete arsehole all the time.
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I've been playing a lot of Oblivion which is excellent. I'm really really enjoying it. I've got about 12 hours in so far and not even bothered to do the main missions yet. Although the levelling system is a bit confusing and I'm not sure I'm advancing my character in a good way so I might have to start over again.
I also borrowed Guitar Hero 2 off a friend which is pretty good but I find the choice of songs a lot less interesting that GH3. Also GH2 is seems much easier than GH3 although in 2 it doesn't make it so obvious which notes you can hammer on/pull off.
At some stage I will have to get onto Xbox live I think but spending the £60 on an adapter is a bit much at the moment so that might have to wait for a bit.
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your comments about guitar hero 2 seem to reflect my comments on guitar hero 3. Although I don't think that the tracks are much better on 3. 2 has the best track - a bonus song called Less Talk More Rokk by the freezepops. Not the best piece of music, but the most fun to play. So far on 3 my favourites are black magic woman, suck my kiss, sunshine of your love, paranoid and welcome to the jungle. Worst is Sabotage.
[ 14.01.2008, 06:51: Message edited by: Dr. Benway ]
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I've unfortunately not seen some of those songs as I believe you have to play in co-op to unlock some of them.
Black magic woman is lots of fun. I also like One and Cliffs of Dover.
I want to enjoy Raining Blood and I'm sure I would but I can't get through the first fast section even on hard which upsets me.
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yes black magic woman is quite different to the standard fare isn't it. They've tried hard to match up your finger moments with the music. One of the few tunes that's actually relaxing to 'play'. Apart from the end.
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new favourite thing about Assassin's Creed - striding around, pushing people off the top of buildings, and then watching the locals gather round the broken corpse, expressing their shock and horror at the terrible accident.
quote:Originally posted by Dr. Benway: new favourite thing about Assassin's Creed - striding around, pushing people off the top of buildings, and then watching the locals gather round the broken corpse, expressing their shock and horror at the terrible accident.
You should try getting a job with one of those "private security firms" in Iraq.
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There are few more satisfying things in Assassin's Creed than going full pelt into a group of people on a horse and watching them scatter.
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I spent part of my lunch hour trying to download Jet Set Willy. After a few attempts I plumped for downloading it from a website which requires that you make a review or visit a sponsor, and then it turns out I have to wait 24 hours more.
Bummer. I hope it turns out I really can download it after all this. I want some nostalgia.
-------------------- Black Mask: Have a good weekend, TMO!
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