posted
I wonder why it's 'a' coffee, and not 'a' tea? No-one would say 'do you want a tea', or 'I stopped by for a tea'. See also: 'a beer', but not 'a wine'. Hmmm.
As for me, I am dependent on tea, and am one of those sad English who misses it while abroad. As, indeed, no-one makes a decent cup outside these isles. Lipton tea bags. I ask you. With a cup of lukewarm water...
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posted
I don't approve of capuccino sachets. Not quite sure why. I think they might be common. Or do they remind me too much of Nighty Night, and Glen.
I'm off to Nottingham now. Gun crime capital of Britain, or similar. Cross your fingers that I don't get gunned down in a drive-by slaying.
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For some reason, Mr Bhogal at the local post office always thought it hilarious that my dad would send me parcels of tea to Spain.
"Another consignment of tea, Mr Phillips?", he would say, cracking up, every time he saw my dad.
I never really understood why it was so funny. I've since become a customer of Mr Bhogal's post office myself, but I've never revealed my true identity to him - it's been my own little secret, a power game I play - he doesn't know I'm the recipient of all that tea.
It adds a real frisson to all our exchanges.
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I think that 'a coffee' probably comes from the fact that you buy 'a coffee' - a cup of coffe as a self contatined product - from take away coffee places. You might even say "a tea" if somebody said that they are going to starbucks, what would you like. Always putting 'a' in front of it is just indicative of how we associate coffee with product.
Beer, perhaps, for the same reasons. People do tend to say 'a glass of wine' though, rather than just 'some wine', perhaps to reflect restaurant culture? Also, there's a degree of faux modesty in saying "have a glass of wine" or "have a pint" as it neatly steps around the truth - that you're going to have several pints or glasses, disgrace yourself, go home to throw up and then wet yourself in the light morning slumber. "some beer" or "some wine" makes it sound like you haven't yet determined how much you're going to need, but a 'pint' or a 'glass' is a sensible, rational amount.
[ 15.08.2007, 06:13: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
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also, saying "would you like to come with me for some beers" sounds more civilized than "would you like to come with me for some beer". "beers" implies an act of purchasing, making decisions, engaging with the economy and being discerning, whereas "some beer" just sounds like you're going to buy petrol. Maybe there's no difference. I'm divining this bullshit from thin fucking air.
[ 15.08.2007, 06:17: Message edited by: Jimmy Big Nuts ]
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Well, the cappucino from a sachet has been drunk, following a harrowing scene I just witnessed. I went downstairs for a cigarette, and was standing outside when I heard a crashing sound. I looked to my right, up towards the main road, about 150 yards away, and saw a car literally flying through the air, rolling sideways. It landed on its side, bouncing, and came to a halt on its roof. I was stunned for a second and then phoned 999 as people who had been involved or stopped in their cars ran to help. I felt frustrated that I couldn't give them all the info they needed, as my view of any other cars was partially blocked. I was calm until I hung up, and then adrenaline kicked off and I've been a bit shaky since. I had the coffee and a kit kat to keep the blood sugar up, and have since been recounting what I saw to everyone in the office. And, er, now I'm telling you lot.
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Yeah, I'm just sitting here trying to let the adrenaline run its course, or whatever it is adrenaline does. I'm feeling worse rather than better.
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H1ppychick
We all prisoners, chickee-baby. We all locked in.
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I was the car behind a crash on a motorway once - some bare-chested youf was driving a knackered car (obviously his first car as he was about 17) at about 85mph in the outside lane whilst I was 50 yards behind him in the middle-lane doing maybe 80mph.
I watched as he lost concentration, hit the central barrier, rebounded at a 70 degree angle, crossed the carriageway, hit the bank, flipped onto his roof, bounced into the middle of the carriageway and eventually came to a halt, on his roof, about 30 ft in front of where I'd slammed on my brakes.
I watched him crawl out of the car, and stagger towards the hard-shoulder, no doubt petrified that his car was about to explode in full-on Hollywood fashion. The incredible thing was that he didn't show any obvious injuries, other than holding his left arm with his right - maybe he'd knackered his shoulder. Just shows what seat-belts can do for you in this situation.
I drove past his car on the inside lane, gingerly avoiding the debris spread all over the carriageway, pulled over into the hard-shoulder about 100 yards down, and called emergency services. By the time I got through (about 30 seconds) there was a 1-mile tailback behind his car. I reported all the details I had (luckily I could pinpoint the location for the police as the off-ramp for the next junction was a mile away) and got the all-clear to drive off.
I drove the remaining 15 miles home at maybe 60 mph, very cautiously, and felt shaky for the rest of the evening.
You never know, mart, the driver in the accident you saw might have been lucky just like the guy I watched crawl out of a car-wreck.
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When I was a kind I remember seeing these two guys driving along in some sort of jeep which didn't even have a roof, while a black man with a Mohican fired a .50 cal machine gun at them from the back of a moving vehicle. They must have hit some sort of explosive or something, because the jeep flipped over in a shower of dirt and debris and came crunching to a halt in a way that made you think "yep, they're definitely fucked", but actually they both got out and though they were holding their heads, and looking a bit dazed, they seemed pretty OK.
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H1ppychick
We all prisoners, chickee-baby. We all locked in.
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shutupnathan
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posted
Yeah, I've been trying to interpret the scenes I saw immediately afterwards, which are already mangled in my mind. People ran up to the car, and the passenger door was opened, and then a few moments later I was surprised at how few people were crowding around the car. My thinking is:
a) that natural tendency to wonder whether it will explode
b) the person/people inside were obviously dead
c) there's just nothing you can do to help people in an upside-down car that's just been in a crash, and everyone knows not to move them
d) people were being sensible and not crowding those traumatised in the car
Thinking about the way the car travelled and hit the road and bounced and everything, I think you're right Hippy, that with seatbelts on they may well survive it relatively unscathed. I hope so.
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Rolling a car isn’t usually as bad as you might imagine. Certainly statistically you’re probably better off in a car which has rolled than a car which has, say, had a major side impact. So long as the roof stays in tact you’re probably going to be ok, just cuts and bruises. Even if the roof crumples slightly, unless it’s a massive impact your head will just be pushed out of the way.
Most deaths involve serious crushing. So side impacts are very bad*, as are frontal impacts. These are probably the worst, especially in older cars where the steering rack and engine aren’t designed to absorb impacts. Usually the engine will intrude into the cabin, crushing your legs, and the steering column will be forced into your chest/fact.
Obviously rolling a convertible is a little bit different, which is why my car is fitted with a rollcage.
*Side impacts are bad obviously because they can crush you, but also, the brain isn’t very good at absorbing lateral blows. Unlike in the frontal blow where the whole brain is rocked back and forth, a side impact can cause the two halves of the brain to move independently of one another. This causes stress on the blood vessels connecting the two halves of the brain, and can cause haemorrhaging. Many patients involved in a violent side impact can feel ok immediately afterwards, yet fall into a coma some time later, from which they will never wake up. There’s a name for this effect but I can’t remember what it is.
Check out this Swedish video of a crash test of a Ford Sierra. Note that the speeds (50, 70, etc) are in KPH not MPH. 100kph = 62mph. Watch what happens to the steering column at 70kph. Watch in horror what happens to the dummy at higher speeds.
posted
The wife of one of my colleagues stormed into the office in tears sometime last year, with her five year old offspring in tow. It turned out that she'd just stopped at a traffic light and seen a kid get hit by a car. In between screams and sobs, and in front of her child, she recounted in graphic detail how she'd seen the boy get ripped apart and strewn all over the road. Our HR lady (and self-styled emotional support officer) quickly took her off to a meeting room and made her a tea.
It was quite harrowing to hear her description and I'd rather not imagine how much worse it would have been to have witness the event.
posted
I was once told a sweet story by this chick who was on a tube platform when somebody jumped, and after the guy was basically sprayed down the length of the platform, everybody standing on the platform threw up. Imagine clearing that shit up eh readers.
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More relaxing and, although it lacked any euphoric high, it was also thankfully void of that inner emptiness that follows, so I think all in all it was more fulfilling.
I also know very little about the pancreas - except that they serve it at Chez Quis in Chicago.
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Brr. An eventful start to the day: just seen a guy on a bike get hit by a car, literally right in front of me: I stopped to let him come out of the footpath (I was on the pavement), and he went straight into the path of an oncoming car. He got clobbered. There was this almighty crunch, and the windscreen shattered and I yelled Jesus Christ and then I was on the phone to the ambulance people shrieking hysterically about a guy getting hit by a car between Didcot and Harwell. Hung around til the ambulance turned up, gave my statement to the police “There was a bike, and the car hit it,” and went on my way to work.
Incredibly, it seems that the windscreen was shattered by HIS HEAD (helmeted). For everything they say about helmets only being good in minor impacts, I don’t think it’s possible to smash a car windscreen with JUST YOUR HEAD and then sit on the pavement and phone up work and tell them you can’t come in because you got hit by a car.
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Yeah, still feel quite sick and shaken, and keep thinking it was my fault for being on the pavement and blocking the cyclist's view of the road. Can't really get that moment of impact out of my head.
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See, I come out of that same footpath and onto the road in front of that same bend at the end of every single day, so it's quite unsettling to see someone else do it and get smashed.
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quote:Originally posted by Black Mask: wait until 11 and then go to the pub.
I could really use a drink, actually. I still feel really sick and shaken. When the car hit him I thought I’d just seen someone get killed, I was a complete mess on the phone, couldn’t remember the name of the road, my mobile phone number anything like that. I calmed down a bit when I saw the guy sit up, but jesus, hearing that crunch and seeing the way he went onto the bonnet and break the windscreen was horrible. It’s making me shake again, just thinking about it. I really thought he was dead, the car hit him so hard. It’s pretty much the most frightening thing I’ve ever seen. I keep thinking it was my fault; if I hadn’t been on the pavement waiting for him to move out of the way so I could get down the cycle path he would have had a much clearer view of the road. He could have died, and it would have been my fault.
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I'm wondering, to be honest, which is more spectacular - seeing a car fly through the air in a crash in the distance, or watching a guy smash a windscreen with his head, right in front of you.
![[Frown]](frown.gif)
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