quote:Originally posted by dang65: Just called vee auld girl, kno' wot i mean. Faaaam'ly innit. Told her I hadn't sent a card and she said not to worry, the best mother's day cards are homemade by the kid. Said I'd see what I can do next year.
It only takes a little more effort to write and send a card than it does to make a telephone call explaining how/why you haven't sent one. It may well be that the best cards are 'homemade by the kid', but that isn't to say that a grown man can't spare all of - oooo - ten minutes to choose an attractive card and write a few heartfelt lines.
Most of the crap you receive through the post as an adult tends to be grim shit demanding money from you or - worse - offering crazyinsane loans to you... how nice it is/would be to receive something attractive from one's offspring to show you're in their thoughts.
quote:Originally posted by dang65: Is it a complete load of patronising sexist bollocks? Does a box of chocolates compensate for a year of slaving over the dishwasher and grappling with ready-cooked meal packaging?
I can't imagine it remotely compensates, but it's a gesture, isn't it? Everyone appreciates the odd gesture, now and again.
We had my mother and 'her husband' round for a meal on the Friday night and dropped round to hers on the Sunday to give her a card and a framed picture of us all at the christening. None of this exactly broke da bank, but I'm pretty sure it meant something to her.
For D's first Mother's Day, Sam and I made a hand/footpainted card which involved a considerable amount of applied violence and baby torture or - as we said when we handed it to her - "love".
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quote:Originally posted by ben: For D's first Mother's Day, Sam and I made a hand/footpainted card which involved a considerable amount of applied violence and baby torture or - as we said when we handed it to her - "love".
For my first Mother's Day after having my son, J did the exact same thing. It was a very touching gesture and I greatly appreciated it, which is what Mother's Day is all about, I feel. Also, it solved the riddle of what the blue stuff between Ben's tiny toes was and how it got there.
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quote:Originally posted by ben: It may well be that the best cards are 'homemade by the kid', but that isn't to say that a grown man can't spare all of - oooo - ten minutes to choose an attractive card and write a few heartfelt lines.
Most of the crap you receive through the post as an adult tends to be grim shit demanding money from you or - worse - offering crazyinsane loans to you... how nice it is/would be to receive something attractive from one's offspring to show you're in their thoughts.
I can't imagine it remotely compensates, but it's a gesture, isn't it? Everyone appreciates the odd gesture, now and again.
Isn't it the fact that is is an "expected" gesture make it a bit of an empty gesture?
As an adult wouldn't it be nicer to show appreciation (flowers/letters/phone calls/spending time with them) thru out the year rather than just on the one day? It's a bit like Valentines Days for mothers.
quote:Originally posted by ben: For D's first Mother's Day, Sam and I made a hand/footpainted card which involved a considerable amount of applied violence and baby torture or - as we said when we handed it to her - "love".
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For Mrs Mask's first Mother's Day I had her sculpted in alabaster and the statue installed at the top of Nelson's Column, in place of Horatio. I then had the London Philharmonic and the company of the English National Opera, dressed in pink, perform 'Mama Wee're All Crazee Now!' as a team of white stallions drew us around Trafalgar Square in the Royal State Coach, while I fed her beluga caviar dusted with flakes of 24-carat gold and Krug served in hand-carved ruby cherubs.
quote:Originally posted by Gemini: As an adult wouldn't it be nicer to show appreciation (flowers/letters/phone calls/spending time with them) thru out the year rather than just on the one day? It's a bit like Valentines Days for mothers.
Or you could do it 'as well as' teh above.
The 'O I show my appreciation ALL THE FUCKING TIME - not when THE MAN tells me to' line could be applied to practically any tradition of gift-giving or card exchange. It's easy to get jaded when you go to Clintons or wherever - but surely the correct alternative is to use more imagination than just going to Clintons rather than simply jettisoning the tradition altogether.
You can make these things as personal as you like - a phone call or txt to excuse yourself merely betrays a lack of effort and imagination.
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quote:Originally posted by Gemini: As an adult wouldn't it be nicer to show appreciation (flowers/letters/phone calls/spending time with them) thru out the year rather than just on the one day? It's a bit like Valentines Days for mothers.
Or you could do it 'as well as' teh above.
The 'O I show my appreciation ALL THE FUCKING TIME - not when THE MAN tells me to' line could be applied to practically any tradition of gift-giving or card exchange. It's easy to get jaded when you go to Clintons or wherever - but surely the correct alternative is to use more imagination than just going to Clintons rather than simply jettisoning the tradition altogether.
You can make these things as personal as you like - a phone call or txt to excuse yourself merely betrays a lack of effort and imagination.
Which is why I then compared it to Valentines Day. I just thought your attack on not doing something on Mothers Day was wrong for adults, maybe because i didn't do anything for mothers day apart from sending a text to say Happy Mothers Day however I don't have a guilty conscience as I regularly organise spending "quality" time with my mother thru out the year, something she and I enjoy much more than me just turning up on one Sunday a year and cooking her/taking her out for a meal. Personally I think that demonstrates much more of a lack of imagination and effort.
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True enough. For the rest of the year I just ignore mother's cries, except to send a glass of tapwater and a piece of stale brioche up via the dumb waiter, which I suppose reflects pretty poorly on my filial instincts.
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did the Netherlands do something freaky with the clocks this weekend? Just had to change this back again.
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