posted
On a plane I'd be like "Alright?, mind if I.. *mimes blow job by moving hand up and down and simutaneously poking tongue in cheek*Posts: 1641
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quote:Originally posted by Tilde: On a plane I'd be like "Alright?, mind if I.. *mimes blow job by moving hand up and down and simutaneously poking tongue in cheek*
quote:Originally posted by Tilde: On a plane I'd be like "Alright?, mind if I.. *mimes blow job by moving hand up and down and simutaneously poking tongue in cheek*
You are Bunny Lebowski and I claim my five pounds.
-------------------- If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down Posts: 2740
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posted
god you lot have short memories - don't forget that science has proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that cunnilingus causes spots or cancer or something.
-------------------- If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down Posts: 2740
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quote:Originally posted by herbs: Does it make any better to know that she had been talking to him for most of the flight, before making a lunge fly-wards?
I guess it was the least she could do in that case. Nothing worse than someone droning on at you for hours on end.
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posted
I guess Plane-a-lingus would be quite difficult to achieve, logistically. It certainly wouldn't be as subtle or easy to hide as a good old-fashioned 'blowie'.
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quote:Originally posted by herbs: Does it make any better to know that she had been talking to him for most of the flight, before making a lunge fly-wards?
It's true that women can sometimes be talked into this sort of thing. You can't just come out and ask, though - better to cunnningly weave it into the conversation and gauge how receptive she is to the idea.
If this forum were Fight Club I would give out Project Mayhem assignments to Dang, Tilde and Miscellaneous Files to see if they could pull this sort of thing off on, say, a National Express journey to somewhere within the UK in the next week.
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posted
National Express is out as I don't want to catch something horrible.
However, the regular delays to the 18:01 First Great Western service from Reading could provide an excellent opportunity, especially if the train is filled with students from the art school. Everyone knows art students are pure filth, plus a portfolio would make a handy improvised privacy screen.
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I got a blow job on a rail replacement bus service once. It seemed quite daring and glamourous at the time, but really it was just seedy and desperate, like something you'd hear in the lyrics to a Pulp song.
-------------------- Now that you've called me by name? Posts: 2007
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quote:Originally posted by Nathan Bleak: a rail replacement bus service
lol - pure Jarvis.
I liked your perfume but still felt rather nervous / You took me between your cherry-red lips / It was a rail replacement bus service / Al-right!Posts: 8657
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Louche
Carved TMO on her clit just to make you feel bad
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I gave a boy a blowjob on a bus once. It wasn't Nathan, because it wasn't a rail replacement bus. In fact, it was a 362 out of Wigan bus station, on a cold and rainy day and we were on the top deck on the back seat and the windows were all grey and rain smeared and the only other person on the top deck was sat on the front seat and staring blankly out of the smear windows.
I bottled on the swallowing at the last minute though and moved away so he jizzed all over the back of the seat in front. We spent the remainder of the journey, a good half hour to sixth form college, watching globdules of glistening jism dribble their way down the seat to pool, cogaulated, on the grimy floor. Smoking regal king size (you could still smoke on buses back then, in those old enlightened times), lit with matches. Just writing that I can taste semen and fag smoke and smell match-sulpher.
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posted
I was given a blow job in a tree once. In Ashton Court Park in Bristol. It was a hollow tree, of the kind a fugitive king might hide in. I certainly felt like royalty that day anyway. I think if I was a fugitive king then however fast I was fleeing I would always take along someone who could give me a blow job whenever we hid in a tree. Or insist that one was supplied by the local royalist supporter who was hiding me. I think I'd make a fairly good king all told. I wouldn't force them to swallow or anything. In fact, I'd carry a small silver box with the royal crest engraved in it in which to store the royal seed until such a time as I was restored to the throne.
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posted
Can't remember if I've posted this here previously, but anyway... An ex of mine was very 'adventurous' when it came to sex. So much so that once, whilst fishing for carp in Lymm, she decided to give me a blow-job on the bank. We were lay down in a fairly secluded spot, behind a large church and a gigantic oak tree. I was astounded when she started undoing her bra and promptly began wanking off my rapidly-stiffening hard-on. She then decided that a nice blow-job was the order of the day. In the meantime I noticed that there were several carp anglers on the opposite bank - a good 200 yards away, but this didn't deter her in the least.
Several minutes later I felt the orgasm approaching and she expertly aimed my cock at her large tits. Suddenly, as the jizz started spraying on her, one of my bite alarms went off, so I spun around quickly and struck, the jizz still dripping into the water, my shorts still down at my ankles. Unfortunately it was a bream that had taken the bait, not a carp. On the plus side, it must have been a fairly interesting spectacle for the fishermen opposite.
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quote:Originally posted by Louche: I bottled on the swallowing at the last minute though and moved away so he jizzed all over the back of the seat in front. We spent the remainder of the journey, a good half hour to sixth form college, watching globdules of glistening jism dribble their way down the seat to pool, cogaulated, on the grimy floor.
*wintry laughter*
What a great, terrible image. Post of the Month.
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