Colleague 1: "That new guy Michael asked to take a photo of me the other day, with my bike"
Colleague 2: "Yeah? What on earth for?"
Colleague 1: "I dunno. He's a bit, y'know... 'funny' isn't he? He seemed to feel safer when he was wearing my cycle helmet. I just smiled and let him get on with it."
Colleague 2: "Makes sense. I didn't realise he was... like he is. Hang on - what's he up to now?"
Colleague 1: "Looks like he's sitting naked in the conference room, measuring his nipples with a shatterproof ruler..."
quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: Colleague 1: "Looks like he's sitting naked in the conference room, measuring his nipples with a shatterproof ruler..."
lol, I just did measure my nipples with a shatterproof ruler.
posted
Scars Some nice patches of scar tissue on the front of my right hand and my right forearm. These were caused by burns I sustained as a baby. They used to cover the whole of my baby forearm but as I've grown, my skin has stretched and shifted and now there are just three patches of scare tissue from about midway down my forearm onwards.
Smiley scar below left knee. This was acquired when I was about 6 or 7 while playing in the back garden with my younger sister. I was pretending to be Dracula and I knelt down as if I was going to bite her while she gave her dollies a tea party. Sadly, I managed to kneel on the little ceramic teapot she was using and the spout went right into my leg. Oddly, I didn't notice anything was wrong until my sister started screaming and pointing at my leg. I remember looking down and thinking how the gash resembled the insides of a tomato
Piercings Three sets of earrings piercings in each ear but two sets are now dormant.
I also had my navel pierced many years ago but recently had to remove the navel bar I had in there due to my burgeoning baby bump. It's left a little tiny hole, again in the shape of a smiley mouth.
Tatts... Just one very small one - a blue butterfly on my back that I had done in a fit of adventerous exuberance while on holiday in Australia. They told me that it was done using 'herbal inks' that would fade within 3-7 years. It's still there, however.
...and that I have very long second toes - longer than my big toes (although one got broken a couple of years ago and now curves crookedly towards my big toe rather than stretching beyond it). I also have very high insteps which make it impossible for me to wear shoes against bare skin in the summer without losing most of the skin on my feet.
I have a large beauty spot (mole, actually) on one of my inner thighs. Apparently, one of my uncles has the same thing. He also had a mole right on the end of his nose, so I suppose I should think myself lucky.
-------------------- They give you a pen as fat as a modest cock and you're expected to dab it on the page, as though you were mopping the dregs of an afternoon Tommy. Posts: 1847
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They're not quite lactating yet, Dazza but it's only a matter of time.
-------------------- They give you a pen as fat as a modest cock and you're expected to dab it on the page, as though you were mopping the dregs of an afternoon Tommy. Posts: 1847
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I think the data would be better represented in the form of circles in perhaps twice the size of reality, where the largest circle is the biggest nipple in the background, then the smaller ones in various different colours in the foreground, if that makes sense. If I was less of a techno spaz I may try to do this myself, but there you go...
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I think maybe a 'not to scale' note would be a valuable addition to that otherwise splendid diagram, to prevent mental scarring.
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If misc updated the nipple-o-meter you would be able to empirically state wether or not Physic has big man-nipples...but yeah, I reckon he has.
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Though given that most of the other men seem to have several spare nipples perhaps his total nipple area is about average?
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Is this nipples plus aureoles, or just nips?
-------------------- What I object to is the colour of some of these wheelie bins and where they are left, in some areas outside all week in the front garden. Posts: 4941
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