Welcome to TMO


TMO is always looking for contributors. We are looking for Writers, Illustrators, Columnists and Script Kiddies to join the TMO team and help create what we hope will be a thriving web community.
See Thru news

"See Thru will be finishing, dead, on Friday April 12th. At the end of the new Attachments series (back in Feb - I forget the date right now). It may carry on in some form. Not sure yet."

We're not exactly rich here at TMO. This site cannot exist on fresh air, so if you have a good idea for funding that doesn't involve us having to fill up the whole site with undignified and over animated banner ads please let us know.
We also accept plain brown envelopes stuffed with cash, but we don't do oral. (often)

How are you feeling ?

Dehydrated, sick and headachy
My head hurts
I feel unhappy
Ow, my guts
I've got a paper cut
Sitting uncomfortably
Bunged up
It hurts when I wee

Were you out last night ?

No, I was too miserable
I went for a curry/kebab/chinese/barbeque
I've still got a paper cut
No, I think I had a fever
Are you kidding me? It hurts to walk
Yes, in the pub till closing time
Yup, shagging!

What time is it ?


Poke your tongue out. What colour is it ?

I don't know, it's too hairy
Poking my tongue out gives me a headache
Pink, but I've still got a paper cut
Sod my tongue, my arse is killing me
Do I really have to poke my tongue out ?
Covered in pubic hair

Which of the following have you experienced so far today ?

Mild throbbing of the temples
Waking up fully clothed and on the carpet
Waking up naked with a stranger
Accidentally soiling yourself
A sore bottom
A paper cut
Abject misery
Snot - And lots of it

How did you sleep last night ?

On my front
With a floozy
All cosy with my teddy bear
In torment, awoken by dreams of death
In a puddle of mucus
Like a drunken fool
With a belly full of vindaloo
OK, but I woke up with a sore head

Are you leaking from anywhere ?

Yes - My rectum
Yes - My personals
Yes - My nose
No, but I'm bleeding a tiny, tiny bit
I may as well be - Life sucks

Are your eyes bloodshot ?


How do you smell ?

Like a cheap tart
I can't smell anything
Like a pub ashtray with a kebab in it
Bad, but worse if I pass wind
Oh great, now I smell. I wish I was dead

On a scale of 1 to 8 how ill do you think you are ?


Please make sure you've answered all the questions!

TMO pointless quizzes are copyright TMO 2002

The Moon Online

The zone

The Moon Online and all it's content is copyright to the usual sources, blah, blah, blah..
The Moon Online copyright 2000