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Today is No Consequences Day. Twenty four hours in which you can do whatever you want, safe in the knowledge that you will never have to pay for your actions. On waking tomorrow, the world will be returned to the state it was in before NCD. Aside from the predictable yet always tempting option of bludgeoning your boss to death with his/her Blackberry, how would you make use of this opportunity?Posts: 14015
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It seems a shame that I couldn't affect the world permanently for what I do today as it would be pretty cruel to have the man who lives across the road come back to life after I murder him by repeatedly banging his f*ing head in the boot of his f*ing car.
The car he parks a mere pavement width away from the front window of my teeny tiny terraced house.
The car which has the boot into which he stands peering for hours; the boot from which he walks back and forth for f*ing hours every night carrying mysterious parcels; the boot he stands next to, hand on raised lid as he chats for f*king hours to his equally f*ing moronic son before they finally decide they have had enough of tormenting me, sitting mere feet away from them, caught in the light of the flickering TV set whilst they pretend they can't see me and I am finally am forced to get up and draw my curtains.
Oh yes.
That and world peace for a day.
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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An excellent question. I guess the trouble is that the most people would 'waste' this opportunity on making a pass at someone completely inapproprate (sister-in-law, boss, cleaning lady etc etc) because we all know the interesting part of bumping off, say, a political leader can only really be judged after a few years (eg. would assassinating Bush lead to Dick Cheney taking over and making an even worse hash of things? Might the succession of Hitler by Goebbels have led to WW2 being avoided but an even larger number of Jews being gassed?)
It's a sorry reflection on the impact that an individual can make in mass society that the only public acts that would garner any attention at all over a 24 hour period would be mass murder or suicide - which, I guess, partly explains the appeal of those options combined to suicide bombers.
You'd have to fall back on something gratifying to yourself, I think. Even that has risks, though, you know. If I were to make a forette the stunningly generous offer of a day and night of no-strings-attached sex in a range of public places, would I actually get any takers? The result of this kind of speculation might not be to my liking - then after 'no consequences' day I'd have to live with grim knowledge as opposed to pleasing fantasy.
I don't know - I'd probably go for doing some interesting, intense, probably fatal activity that I could then recover from, Groundhog Day style - it would be interesting to establish how long I could hold my own in a fight with a tiger and what 'dying' was like in the final moments. So there you go - boundless opportunity unleashes nothing more impressive than my inner-Steve Irwin.
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Just a thought. If the world would return to the way it was the day before, would that mean that everyone but you would forget what had happened?
It would be pretty cool if not because you could plan something really meaningful and let everyone experience the consequences for the day so that the next day, when order as it was is restored, if everyone remembers it, it could lead to some of them seeking that change.
Of course, that begs the question what you could achieve in a day that would produce results that would make people want to reproduce them in the following era.
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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quote:Originally posted by ben: If I were to make a forette the stunningly generous offer of a day and night of no-strings-attached sex in a range of public places, would I actually get any takers? The result of this kind of speculation might not be to my liking - then after 'no consequences' day I'd have to live with grim knowledge as opposed to pleasing fantasy.
You could bang them anyway I mean - if there are no consequences to them then would it still be a Bad Thing? Also would you have memory of this day? If you did and if you comitted such an atrocity, wouldn't it haunt you forever that you'd done it? Hardly consequence-free. But then, if you're not going to remember any of it... what's the point?
I'd be tempted to try and steal a car and then go on a driving rampage across Oxfordshire. I quite like the image of hammering across fields with police cars following me and a helicopter hovering above. But it probably wouldn't happen like that - I'd probably get arrested before I even got the car door open. So I dunno. Rape and car theft is out. What is else is there? I'd probably just but a few X-box games, try them out safe in the knowledge that if they were rubbish I didn't have to have paid for them.
-------------------- Now that you've called me by name? Posts: 2007
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I would start take-over rumours in as many stocks as feasibly possible; buying sizeable stakes in each of them over the course of the trading day. As the whiff of these rumours hits the market, I will take the profits in each of the positions just before the market closes at 4.30pm. The following day would, of course, see no 'market manipulation' investigations from the FSA and LSE, and I would be on my plane to the Caribbean, awaiting the transfer of funds into my newly-opened Cayman bank account.
quote:Originally posted by Nathan Bleak: You could bang them anyway I mean - if there are no consequences to them then would it still be a Bad Thing? Also would you have memory of this day? If you did and if you comitted such an atrocity, wouldn't it haunt you forever that you'd done it? Hardly consequence-free.
That's a pretty chilling thought. If men thought they could rape without consequences (except in the parallel world short term to the victim) how many would go for it?
As you say, there would be consequences for your own soul, which would maybe be the one, unarticulated, thing holding most people back: If I'm capable of anything, given the circumstances, what does this make me?
lol - no wonder my novel-length trawl through the sewer that is the male psyche is proving such a protracted and debilitating business.
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Do you really think people would go for the gratification of the most basic, even baser instincts? If so, it's a bleak prognosis for mankind because it seems to hint we are only half-way decent because we are afraid of getting caught.
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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I'd like to see if I could really jump to the next office building, from the top of the one in which I work. It doesn't look too far. I reckon I'd make it if I could get a decent run-up. It's a question that's often occurred to me, usually during dull repetetive tasks. First though, I'd go to town and buy some really expensive sunglasses and a nice leather coat so I looked the part. I don't even like the Matrix really, but I think it's important to put on a performance.
I'd like to steal a bus as well. Thorn's GTA style rampage sounds like a lot of fun. In fact I might put together a hastily built killdozer, like that chap in America. He must've enjoyed himself a whole lot before those pesky consequences kicked in.
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quote:Originally posted by sam: Do you really think people would go for the gratification of the most basic, even baser instincts? If so, it's a bleak prognosis for mankind because it seems to hint we are only half-way decent because we are afraid of getting caught.
You said so yourself, Sam.
quote:Originally posted by sam: Yes, ben. And as you can see, I would be the first to waste the opportunity.
quote:Originally posted by sam: Do you really think people would go for the gratification of the most basic, even baser instincts? If so, it's a bleak prognosis for mankind because it seems to hint we are only half-way decent because we are afraid of getting caught.
Well, I think there's always an element where 'fear-of-getting-caught' plays a part as deterrent - after all that's why you have to make laws against things. If people weren't going to do it, then there'd be no point making it illegal.
Nonetheless, I think it's clear that the diminishing of your own soul, the guilt, the destruction of your self esteem act as deterrents for the vast majority of people. I'm sure everyone here has done something bad, whch they got away with, even in terms of not actually hurting someone (like a fling that your partner never finds out about) but still felt a sense of crippling guilt and shame over.
-------------------- Now that you've called me by name? Posts: 2007
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After re-reading the initial post, I would use the day to drive a Suzuki Hayabusa GSXR1300 motorcycle across the country, at full throttle, whilst listening to Sepultura through my headphones. That would be nice.
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quote:Originally posted by MiscellaneousFiles: I'd like to see if I could really jump to the next office building, from the top of the one in which I work. It doesn't look too far. I reckon I'd make it if I could get a decent run-up. It's a question that's often occurred to me, usually during dull repetetive tasks. First though, I'd go to town and buy some really expensive sunglasses and a nice leather coat so I looked the part. I don't even like the Matrix really, but I think it's important to put on a performance.
I'd like to steal a bus as well. Thorn's GTA style rampage sounds like a lot of fun. In fact I might put together a hastily built killdozer, like that chap in America. He must've enjoyed himself a whole lot before those pesky consequences kicked in.
An adult Columbine?
Nice you lot. Rape and mass murder.
But I would invite you down my road. That neighbour of mine is asking for something.
I would pay for a dream day and night on my credit card because I wouldn't have to pay the bill afterwards. I'd spend a couple of hours paragliding; then have a quick helicopter ride to a small airport where I would have a few hours with a flying instructor so I could pilot a plane myself, and then I would have the afternoon in a glider, silently soaring above it all. Then I would take my old man out for a meal in one of the best restaurants in Europe, somewhere warm so we could eat outside, and top it all off with the rest of the night with him in the best hotel in Europe. We'd be like Zefferelli's Romeo and Juliet when we awoke; all romatic and sorry to see it go just before the morning breeze blew in and the magic ended.
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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quote:Originally posted by Ringo: hold on.... you'd spend the night in a hotel with your dad?
It doesn't mean my dad where I come from. And he is quite an old guy too and he is my man.
Hmmn.
My dad is one of those bald, bearded guys who looks like his head is on upside down. Quite apart from the usual tabboos, it is hard to imagine anyone wanting to spend the night with him, but I have to assume my mum did. At least three times.
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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That would suck actually. You'd be trying to do your own thing while fighing off hordes of people wanting to either beat you up, or have sex with you, possibly by force. You'd never get anything done.
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Anyway! Don't get pissy with me about a spot of incest. In the great scheme of things are you telling me it'd be worse than mass murder, you loonies?
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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quote:Originally posted by sam: Anyway! Don't get pissy with me about a spot of incest. In the great scheme of things are you telling me it'd be worse than mass murder, you loonies?
I just wanted to be able to drive like a benny without breaking the car or getting a secion 59. I'm not the one who wants to fuck their dad.
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I think it's well documented that on the occasions in history where there really have been No Consequences Days, people did go for the shag-anything-in-sight option. Males and females. That and unrestrained alcohol swilling and ultraviolence. It's what we do.
Looting is also popular of course, though I don't recall many reports of driving-very-fast-while-naked, but then cars haven't been around all that long really, and in places like the last days of Berlin '45 there probably wasn't a lot of open road to let loose on anyway.
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not...
You reached over with your hand and knocked my Jap over
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8:30am - 1. Destruction Derby I'd go out and smash up my neighbours cars - one family down my street park in a really selfish way. They're always out there swapping cars round, dominating parking spaces and generally acting in a ***** way. I'd go and hire a few cars; a volvo and some 4x4's and spend a good half hour smashing the fucking shit out of their cars. Then I'd torch them and whilst the flames were licking the sky I'd go and smash their house up a bit, hopefully the wife would come out and start screaming and shit and I'd run her over a few times - maybe... I dunno if i'd actually have the stomach for the last bit, I imagine a few people would have come out of their houses and try to stop my rampage, so I would probably have to run them down a bit too. I guess I'm just going to have to get used to that.
8:30am - 2. Scramble away Anyhow, I'd be a bit keyed up now and the emergency services would be on their way so I'd jump on a trail bike I just bought with one of the many credit cards I applied for during the planning stage of this day. A Honda XR250 probably, and make my escape across public footpaths and farmers fields, Spending a few minutes on the local golf course.
9-30am - 3. Push 'n' Roll Go to a skate shop and buy a brand new set up (Skateboard) go to a shopping centre and just have a roll on the perfect flat marble floors until I got stopped by the security guard. I reckon on about 5 minutes of lovely smooth rolling before I get stopped.
10:30am - 4. Sports car to London Jump in a hired Aston Martin and drive it up to London, buy myself some suits and and a few changes of clothes from the most expensive stores I could find. Then it's off to the Luxury Penthouse flat I've rented in Mayfair. To get changed and fuck about with the electronicy stuff for a bit.
12:30pm - 4. Sashimi death gorge out Go to a Japanese restaurant and order most of the menu, just to try everything and anything I fancy. Including Sea urchins.
2-30pm - 5. Expensive Hooker I'm a bit ashamed but it has to be done.
2-33pm - 6. chill for a bit er... maybe a jacuzzi
3:00pm - 7. Another Hooker Probably a black one.
3:30pm - 8. Some remorse
4:00pm - 9. Another Hooker or three Maybe just get two or three of them to sex up on the bed whilst I watch and video them.
6:30pm - 10. Dinner probably claridges with the three hookers
10:00pm - 11. Games console fest Spend the rest of the night playing all the latest games consoles inc. playstation 3 japanese import.
11:30pm - 12. Another Hooker Probably an asian.
11.58 - 13. Chocolate gorge out Eat a yorkie, walnut whip and flake.
quote:Originally posted by sam: And he is quite an old guy too and he is my man.
Is he a dustman? Does he wear the associated headgear? Could his trousers best be described as "cor-blimey"?
My beloved - not my father, you understand - dresses extremely well, I will have you know and he works in an office and manages to look extremely sexy in his suit as well! And he is sexy and experienced and charming.
Which is quite enough chit-chat about my private life!
-------------------- A day without laughter is a day wasted. In memory of Alastair Posts: 1936
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